Posted on Sep 1, 2014
Lady Valor: Navy SEAL-turned transgender. Fair for his family?
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He was part of SEAL Team 6 (aka: Development Group, or DEVGRU, equivalent to Army Delta Force, or SFOD-D), the elite of the elite. Until he 'came out' and went transgender.
He may have accomplished missions while on teams and his views and preferences seemed irrelevant as long as missions were completed, but is it fair to the family that he hurt and practically 'left behind'? How did he get so caught up in 'American Dream' and wouldn't he 'come out' earlier?
PS: I'm NOT here to bash his decision to cross-gender. I'm here to express my disappointment to the family he let down after so many years. What's your take on this?
Please be objective and respectful. And if you decide to down-vote, your explanation will be appreciated.
The link below points to series that will commence on CNN shortly documenting her (formerly HIS) life:
http://www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/us/cnn-films-lady-valor-the-kristin-beck-story
He may have accomplished missions while on teams and his views and preferences seemed irrelevant as long as missions were completed, but is it fair to the family that he hurt and practically 'left behind'? How did he get so caught up in 'American Dream' and wouldn't he 'come out' earlier?
PS: I'm NOT here to bash his decision to cross-gender. I'm here to express my disappointment to the family he let down after so many years. What's your take on this?
Please be objective and respectful. And if you decide to down-vote, your explanation will be appreciated.
The link below points to series that will commence on CNN shortly documenting her (formerly HIS) life:
http://www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/us/cnn-films-lady-valor-the-kristin-beck-story
Marriage
Transgender
Family
Edited >1 y ago
Posted >1 y ago
Responses: 28
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To say he should have done it differently or came out is an easy response when you take no time to actually educate yourself on the subject matter.
This year is the first time legislature has even been suggested to end the trend of medical treat camps been to reverse gay tendencies. Yes, there are medical and religious camps with the sole purpose of reversing gay.
Considering Kristen left the navy in 2011 and don't ask don't tell wasn't repealed until sept 20 2011 the suggestion of just coming out wasn't really an option.
It is both horrible that he had to live a lie and that his family had to go trough that difficult transition. But he isn't the only one and this can be a learning experience. Kristen is a war hero and even braver for coming out the way she did. Everyone has the right to happiness.
This year is the first time legislature has even been suggested to end the trend of medical treat camps been to reverse gay tendencies. Yes, there are medical and religious camps with the sole purpose of reversing gay.
Considering Kristen left the navy in 2011 and don't ask don't tell wasn't repealed until sept 20 2011 the suggestion of just coming out wasn't really an option.
It is both horrible that he had to live a lie and that his family had to go trough that difficult transition. But he isn't the only one and this can be a learning experience. Kristen is a war hero and even braver for coming out the way she did. Everyone has the right to happiness.
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It's not fair to others to misrepresent yourself or withhold something that could later manifest itself and detriment your relationship with them. I'm not saying you have to tell them every sordid detail of your life and all the stupid things you did growing up/earlier in life/on overseas deployments that you will never repeat again (partying, drinking, frat stuff, and the kinds of things that went on in places like PI, etc.), but if it's something that is still nagging you and could affect your relationship, it should be discussed. Especially doubts about your own sexuality. WTFO?
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SPC (Join to see)
Sexual orientation and gender identity are not synonymous, Sir. In fact, a recent study of the hypothalmy (hypothalmuses?) of transgender personnel in comparison to those of hetero- and homosexual people showed a stark contrast between the hypothalamus of, say, a trans* woman and those of straight and gay males (who, interestingly enough, had similar structures in that part of the brain). HOWEVER, said trans* woman's hypothalamus was almost IDENTICAL to those of straight/lesbian women.
Please see above, where I address the "secrecy" issue, Sir.
Please see above, where I address the "secrecy" issue, Sir.
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Capt Jeff S.
The LGBT community is well known for commissioning studies which come up with facts to support their theories.
http://downloads.frc.org/EF/EF08L41.pdf
http://downloads.frc.org/EF/EF08L41.pdf
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I don't see your point more or less, it's rather likely that she was repressing and pushing aside any feelings in that direction for a very long time. There comes a point however where for your own mental and physical health, you cannot continue living a lie. Transitioning doesn't necessarily mean you leave your family behind, some families can and do survive intact, others cannot, just like some families don't survive other serious medical conditions. In the end it's certainly none of our business.
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This man is certainly not first man to come out as a transgendered individual after many years of marriage and a career in the military. We will never know what makes people tick. But it is obviously a difficult decision in a persons life to change their gender/role. I think men are raised to bury all emotions deep down inside and ignore who they really are. I think he should have told his wife earlier about who he was inside. But men are always ashamed... I respect his service though. I hope his wife and children can continue loving and accepting him over his changes.
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None of my business. He kept his personal business to himself and served a full and distinguished career, if he wants to live as a she in retirement then best wishes to her.
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PO1 (Join to see)
Mr. Edwards, though I appreciate your comment, please be careful on how you phrase it as to not sound judgmental like they did during European Inquisition.
If you're using a Christian perspective, remember we were NEVER given authority to judge. Not even the Son of man. We were however given authority to correct, discipline, rebuke if we must. All however done WITH LOVE.
In this case we must still love Chris (or Christine) as a person, but express some of his actions and decisions as not very praise-worthy.
If you're using a Christian perspective, remember we were NEVER given authority to judge. Not even the Son of man. We were however given authority to correct, discipline, rebuke if we must. All however done WITH LOVE.
In this case we must still love Chris (or Christine) as a person, but express some of his actions and decisions as not very praise-worthy.
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Well it was his decision to come out when he did and for reasons only he/she will only know even if he did decide to publicly share a few of the reasons. It is not our place to pass judgment on him for his decision in his personal life, However we do not know how he got caught up in the "American Dream" but if i were to guess like with any lie you can easily get wrapped up in it and it can become a faulted reality.
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PO1 (Join to see)
Well I have to admit this was one heck of an American Dream. He became a SEAL, a monumental accomplishment indeed. He then underwent further grueling by getting selected for Sixers. He then got married and had kids.
He'd done quite substantial accomplishments in living it up. Don't know about you, but something tells me his mind may've got warped when he was a SEAL. Something just doesn't add up
He'd done quite substantial accomplishments in living it up. Don't know about you, but something tells me his mind may've got warped when he was a SEAL. Something just doesn't add up
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LTC (Join to see)
I really hope that some SEAL saw your comment and objected. He's not the first SEAL or combat veteran to undergo gender transformation. It might be easier to compare a transgendered person to someone who grew up in North Korea, knowing he is different, having to be careful about what he says to whom, and dealing with expectations to get married and have kids.
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LTC (Join to see)
Maybe North Korea wasn't the best example. Compare the experience if being gay or transgendered to living during the Red Scare. The FBI, headed by a closet gay, kept files on people and ruined their lives because of their "supposed" ideology (and sexual orientation for some). Mere rumors are enough to damage peoples' lives, and get one fired.
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