Posted on May 29, 2015
Post Traumatic Stress and Children. What are your thoughts?
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PTSD
Children
Family
Warfare
Responses: 19
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Gets me thinking about how I've treated my children since my return of my fourth deployment... I've been an asshole (sorry for the language). They are a little young to truly express their thoughts in a letter.. but everyday I see them getting a little more frightened of me.. Maybe I should talk to them, and try getting back to where things used to be. Tell your daughter thanks..
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1SG Jason Fitzpatrick
@ SFC Bo Lathrop, I really appreciate what you said, and yes, you should talk to them, but first, talk to a professional. Battle, you gotta deal with that Devil before you can talk to the little people. Get help before your children say "you destroy everything that you touch, I son't want to be part of your life"...I have been seeking and receiving help, I think that is part fo the reason My beautifully Strong daughter was able to finally express this and feel comfortable enough to show it to me. I am trying to get better, and I am getting help. It is a slow process, but for God's sake, start it. It will not get better by ignoring it...Courage to ask for help Sergeant!
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Well written, and full of emotions. My heart goes out to you and your family, 1SG.
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You have a VERY strong daughter, Top. Very well written. I hope that she continues to be able to show you that her feeling about your struggles. My heart goes out to your family.
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Top, I have borrowed this letter to share on Facebook, I haven't used your name or your daughter's name (of course) but the word needs to really get out.
This is what I posted with the letter:
A Retired First Sergeant on RallyPoint​ posted this today, his daughter wrote it and I apologize Top for stealing it but the words are what matter, this is so true, and not all PTSD is created equal. I know people whose PTSD has affected their entire ability to live a normal life while others only have the "minor" effects listed in this letter.
This is what I posted with the letter:
A Retired First Sergeant on RallyPoint​ posted this today, his daughter wrote it and I apologize Top for stealing it but the words are what matter, this is so true, and not all PTSD is created equal. I know people whose PTSD has affected their entire ability to live a normal life while others only have the "minor" effects listed in this letter.
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1SG Jason Fitzpatrick
I posted it on my Facebook page as well Mr. Huddleston, The only thing that I ask is that you give her the credit fro her words. I am so proud of her strength.
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Top, this is very well written and is something that should be discussed at so many higher levels. Your daughter poignantly portrays everyday life from a child's perspective. My hope is that this goes viral and people realize that it is not just the servicemember that is affected. I also hope that you can somehow make it through everything that you are going through to be there how she needs you to be. I know it is not easy, but for all of those warriors out there dealing with their own demons I pray that they continue to work for a better tomorrow each and every day.
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1SG Jason Fitzpatrick
Feel free to share. the only thing that I ask is that you give her the credit for it.
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At the risk of having my head handed to me ...
Perhaps this is why warriors should not have families.
Perhaps this is why warriors should not have families.
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SPC (Join to see)
I've heard this. I also just read an article how the military is increasingly replenished by family members of our own.
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SPC Jan Allbright, M.Sc., R.S.
yea .. the warrior sub-culture thing.
Now that's a scary appendage of the forever-war.
Now that's a scary appendage of the forever-war.
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1SG Jason Fitzpatrick
I started another discussion regarding the advice people have given to their children as they start their military career. Of course, a lot of "Don't Do it" comments, but we raise them to make their own decisions.
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SFC (Join to see)
You make a valid point, Mr. Allbright. The age old saying, "Well, you were never issued a family at CIF."
While our spouses understand what they are getting into (to a degree), the children didn't choose the military life. It is rough, for sure, and all we can do is try and help them understand why Mommy/Daddy wakes up in the middle of the night looking for his rifle, or jumps every time a bomb explodes on the TV.
While our spouses understand what they are getting into (to a degree), the children didn't choose the military life. It is rough, for sure, and all we can do is try and help them understand why Mommy/Daddy wakes up in the middle of the night looking for his rifle, or jumps every time a bomb explodes on the TV.
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Not only does it affect our children but our spouses as well. This is one of the reasons I am going through my second divorce because of PTSD and depression. I can say I am a little better now and maybe it's because I am too myself for the most part. I get my children every other weekend so I still get to spend time with them individually.
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1SG Jason Fitzpatrick, that is really compelling stuff.
Every day, I try to pick the kids up and spin them around just like always. Even when I don't want to because the joy I once had for it isn't there anymore. It is for them.
I spent a day in the yard with the kids over the weekend, just doing whatever they wanted. Frisbee.
Soccer.
Tossing a baseball.
My daughter ran up after a break in the action and hugged me and told me it was the "best day ever".
Life has been anything but perfect for me since I got home last fall. Pending divorce. Lots of tension and chaos. But for one perfect moment, I was just happy to be daddy.
Every day, I try to pick the kids up and spin them around just like always. Even when I don't want to because the joy I once had for it isn't there anymore. It is for them.
I spent a day in the yard with the kids over the weekend, just doing whatever they wanted. Frisbee.
Soccer.
Tossing a baseball.
My daughter ran up after a break in the action and hugged me and told me it was the "best day ever".
Life has been anything but perfect for me since I got home last fall. Pending divorce. Lots of tension and chaos. But for one perfect moment, I was just happy to be daddy.
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Really, I hope you and your family will become stronger for this, and be happier in the long run. Best of luck.
I don't know if writing is something she has a knack for, but it certainly seems like it. I hope her great ability to express herself can be fostered and will help you all.
Nothing like crying children to go with your morning coffee to remind you that life sucks. I'm going to go hide in a corner now. (I'm sure my whole post is inappropriate. I really mean well, 1SG).
I don't know if writing is something she has a knack for, but it certainly seems like it. I hope her great ability to express herself can be fostered and will help you all.
Nothing like crying children to go with your morning coffee to remind you that life sucks. I'm going to go hide in a corner now. (I'm sure my whole post is inappropriate. I really mean well, 1SG).
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1SG Jason Fitzpatrick
Thanks, no offense was taken. I am very proud of my daughter's ability to express her feelings, and that is what I am working on as well.
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