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You've seen it. It's in the hallways: posters taped to walls, pop up figures in corners with SHARP banners, tables with cards and other literature promoting the program. Where I work, there are even stickers on the bathroom mirror like a picture frame saying that I am part of the SHARP program. No I'm not.
Like most of you, I have sat through the dry, boring SHARP power point slides and videos. Sexual Harassment/Assault Response & Prevention. Oh joy - who actually looks forward to these things?
In every video the scenarios are the same. Here it is, blunt as can be for you: Girl gets drunk and can't keep her legs closed. Guy gets drunk and becomes a sexual predator. What's the solution the Army comes up with: YOU better go to the bar and baby sit people. Why? They're over 18, they're adults. What's that? Someone say "it's your responsibility?" No. Absolutely not.
I am 30 years old, have a wife and two small children. Where was I at 0230 hrs on Saturday when PFC Idiot was drunk and having sex with the drunk PV2 She-idiot? I was a home, where a married father should be. Why wasn't I at the barracks Friday night checking on people? Because those are the single soldier's quarters. Married individuals have no business there. I've seen what married Soldiers do in the barracks - it damn sure ain't their job.
That's like blaming TV for a kid's actions instead of crappy parenting. How about the military address the real problem: Can't control your alcohol without making bad decisions? DON'T DRINK! Oh my goodness...a logical, mature thought. Besides - two drunk people having sex isn't rape. Just because one party wakes up and thinks "oh no! I shouldn't have done that" doesn't mean you were attacked and doesn't warrant filing a report on someone. You got drunk and made a bad choice. It means you're an idiot and lack self control, period.
Lets talk more about this SHARP failure. All videos/scenarios point to lower enlisted Soldiers. Anyone keeping up with the news? Seems like here lately our offenders are mostly senior enlisted and officers. Hmmm...profiling the wrong crowd with all this stuff much?
Our SHARP program goes into how to report an incident that's already happened, or other Soldiers having to make on the spot corrections as they see something happening. "Hey man, that's not cool, don't do that." "Why are you letting him talk to you that way". "She's not a piece of meat, bro." Then they slide into how to tell on someone for their behavior. Tell on them. What, are we in kindergarten?
How about this...instead of running and telling a third party that a guy just slapped you on the ass or said something way, way off center, you ball your fist and you break his nose? Kick him in the satchel. How about you make it so abundantly clear that you are not to be fucked with and harassed that it never, ever happens again? Call it excessive? I don't. Rape and being sexually harassed is serious - so destroy the behavior with a serious response to it.
Think of it this way: what you would tell your daughter if she said something was going on? Easy dad...me too, I'd find the little bastard and I would - I'm right there with you. But seriously: what would you tell her? Go tell the principal? Or would you tell her to put the kid on his ass and end it right then and there?
So why do we tell our Soldiers NOT to stick up for themselves and just go tell a third party to handle a problem? Did tattling on people ever solve anything in your life? Didn't work for me either.
Lastly, its now on my NCOER. How do I help support the SHARP program? Easy, I keep my d#*% in my pants and my hands to myself while at work. Seriously?
Our kinder, friendlier culture doesn't want anyone to stand up for themselves. They want you to report, tell, and play nice about it. There is no Prevention in this program. Until the actual issue here: drunken stupidity, immaturity, and taking responsibility for one's personal well being is addressed, nothing will change.
Like most of you, I have sat through the dry, boring SHARP power point slides and videos. Sexual Harassment/Assault Response & Prevention. Oh joy - who actually looks forward to these things?
In every video the scenarios are the same. Here it is, blunt as can be for you: Girl gets drunk and can't keep her legs closed. Guy gets drunk and becomes a sexual predator. What's the solution the Army comes up with: YOU better go to the bar and baby sit people. Why? They're over 18, they're adults. What's that? Someone say "it's your responsibility?" No. Absolutely not.
I am 30 years old, have a wife and two small children. Where was I at 0230 hrs on Saturday when PFC Idiot was drunk and having sex with the drunk PV2 She-idiot? I was a home, where a married father should be. Why wasn't I at the barracks Friday night checking on people? Because those are the single soldier's quarters. Married individuals have no business there. I've seen what married Soldiers do in the barracks - it damn sure ain't their job.
That's like blaming TV for a kid's actions instead of crappy parenting. How about the military address the real problem: Can't control your alcohol without making bad decisions? DON'T DRINK! Oh my goodness...a logical, mature thought. Besides - two drunk people having sex isn't rape. Just because one party wakes up and thinks "oh no! I shouldn't have done that" doesn't mean you were attacked and doesn't warrant filing a report on someone. You got drunk and made a bad choice. It means you're an idiot and lack self control, period.
Lets talk more about this SHARP failure. All videos/scenarios point to lower enlisted Soldiers. Anyone keeping up with the news? Seems like here lately our offenders are mostly senior enlisted and officers. Hmmm...profiling the wrong crowd with all this stuff much?
Our SHARP program goes into how to report an incident that's already happened, or other Soldiers having to make on the spot corrections as they see something happening. "Hey man, that's not cool, don't do that." "Why are you letting him talk to you that way". "She's not a piece of meat, bro." Then they slide into how to tell on someone for their behavior. Tell on them. What, are we in kindergarten?
How about this...instead of running and telling a third party that a guy just slapped you on the ass or said something way, way off center, you ball your fist and you break his nose? Kick him in the satchel. How about you make it so abundantly clear that you are not to be fucked with and harassed that it never, ever happens again? Call it excessive? I don't. Rape and being sexually harassed is serious - so destroy the behavior with a serious response to it.
Think of it this way: what you would tell your daughter if she said something was going on? Easy dad...me too, I'd find the little bastard and I would - I'm right there with you. But seriously: what would you tell her? Go tell the principal? Or would you tell her to put the kid on his ass and end it right then and there?
So why do we tell our Soldiers NOT to stick up for themselves and just go tell a third party to handle a problem? Did tattling on people ever solve anything in your life? Didn't work for me either.
Lastly, its now on my NCOER. How do I help support the SHARP program? Easy, I keep my d#*% in my pants and my hands to myself while at work. Seriously?
Our kinder, friendlier culture doesn't want anyone to stand up for themselves. They want you to report, tell, and play nice about it. There is no Prevention in this program. Until the actual issue here: drunken stupidity, immaturity, and taking responsibility for one's personal well being is addressed, nothing will change.
Edited >1 y ago
Posted >1 y ago
Responses: 24
Sexual Harrasment/Assault is not an Army issue, it is a parenting issue. Good, decent, well raised human beings do not require training to know that these behaviors are wrong and morally reprehensible. If they need to be taught that at this stage, there is nothing we can do for them. Their formulative years have been wasted. All we can do is identify them and remove them from the service.
There is no amount of training that will undo 17 + years of bad parenting.
There is no amount of training that will undo 17 + years of bad parenting.
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SGT Zila Winstead
I don't want to say you are completely wrong, but saying there is "no amount of training will undo" the problem, I say that is wrong. I understand that we cannot completely change the mindset but by ignoring the situation is not going to help. And by also saying, "lets identify them and remove them from service" it sounds similar to "lets get rid of them and make it someone else's problem". I get it, the training may suck in your eyes, but for some people it works, it may not be a lot, but it is some. And that some, makes a difference.
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SGT (Join to see)
Just another example of mass punishment (mass mandatory training) because the Army doesn't manage personnel very well. SSG Hasbun has a good point- most Army soldiers don't have proper home-training and Army culture adds fuel to the fire. They send plane loads of young women to work and live in remote areas with sex-deprived, uneducated alcoholics... and then they wonder "why do we continue to have SHARP cases?" It's insane. My wife and daughter cannot go anywhere without "JOE" being loud, cussing, undressing every female with his eyes... We need to admit, and our congressmen need to know that the ARMY is not family oriented by any means.
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I have seen these videos. And they are awful. I can understand the intent behind them, but much of this SHARP program is a PC CYA exercise.
It takes the focus off of individual behavior and places the responsibility on third parties. Should we watch out for each other...absolutely. But at which point do we emphasize the reason we got into a situation that requires us to be held accountable for someone else's poor decisions?
We have got to get to a position in which we can discuss and evaluate this entire concept of "victim blaming." Taking personal damn responsibility is a good start, male or female.
To me, as a woman, many of these videos are sickening. They portray women as weak, naive idiots who place themselves in avoidable situations. And demand that other people take responsibility for the consequences.
I teach my own three daughters to be responsible for themselves. My seven-year-old grasps this concept. It's insulting to be promoted to the mostly-male military as "princesses", especially in light of the constant demands on our occupation for "equality in the ranks."
It takes the focus off of individual behavior and places the responsibility on third parties. Should we watch out for each other...absolutely. But at which point do we emphasize the reason we got into a situation that requires us to be held accountable for someone else's poor decisions?
We have got to get to a position in which we can discuss and evaluate this entire concept of "victim blaming." Taking personal damn responsibility is a good start, male or female.
To me, as a woman, many of these videos are sickening. They portray women as weak, naive idiots who place themselves in avoidable situations. And demand that other people take responsibility for the consequences.
I teach my own three daughters to be responsible for themselves. My seven-year-old grasps this concept. It's insulting to be promoted to the mostly-male military as "princesses", especially in light of the constant demands on our occupation for "equality in the ranks."
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Many of the prevention programs were initiated as CYA procedures. Even the highest ranked person can admit that no amount of classes or briefings will change human nature. If a person is going to commit an offense no amount of training is going to dissuade them. In fact I have heard soldiers joke about the classes being training videos on how to get away with it.
Fortunately alcohol is not a complete defense in criminal proceedings despite it common being used as such. I have investigated many cases over the years where Johnny and Jenny were drinking and having a good time, but someone passed out before 2nd base. Where the other figured it was ok to take it to home plate without the others consent is beyond me.
Much like Jeff Foxworthy used to joke about warning labels, they wouldn't be there if someone didn't do try to do it.
Fortunately alcohol is not a complete defense in criminal proceedings despite it common being used as such. I have investigated many cases over the years where Johnny and Jenny were drinking and having a good time, but someone passed out before 2nd base. Where the other figured it was ok to take it to home plate without the others consent is beyond me.
Much like Jeff Foxworthy used to joke about warning labels, they wouldn't be there if someone didn't do try to do it.
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