Posted on Jun 13, 2016
Take needs of the Army assignment or keep my daughter? What to choose.
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I am faced with going Needs of the Army, or get out. If I go NoA, I lose my daughter. If I get out, I may not be able to support her. The judge presiding over my custody case told me that the only way I will get custody of my daughter is to get stationed at Bragg. But in order to do that, I need Airborne School. I can only get it if I reenlist for it, but HRC Retention is not wanting to play ball. What would you do, RP? Because I don't want to lose my kid, but I also don't want to get out, only to risk not being able to get back in.
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Edited >1 y ago
Posted >1 y ago
Responses: 50
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Time to man up, what ever it may me. What is your priority andjow are you going to accomplish it
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1. Get help
2. seek out your squad leader, ask to speak to top (1SG). Make sure command is aware and ask what resources are available.
3. Talk to chap (Chaplin).
4. Go to mental health- speak to sociologist or counselor to get assistance
5. Go see JAG. Laywer. Pay for Laywer if necessary.
Be keenly aware that there is a gender double standard and sexually prejudicial methodology that many courts have applied to parental rights. Do surrender your dreams or your rights.
And in the interim , for God sake, go to airborne school son and stop being a dirty nasty filthy stinking leg !!! :)
You can do all of this. Organize and make a plan then execute
Airborne!
2. seek out your squad leader, ask to speak to top (1SG). Make sure command is aware and ask what resources are available.
3. Talk to chap (Chaplin).
4. Go to mental health- speak to sociologist or counselor to get assistance
5. Go see JAG. Laywer. Pay for Laywer if necessary.
Be keenly aware that there is a gender double standard and sexually prejudicial methodology that many courts have applied to parental rights. Do surrender your dreams or your rights.
And in the interim , for God sake, go to airborne school son and stop being a dirty nasty filthy stinking leg !!! :)
You can do all of this. Organize and make a plan then execute
Airborne!
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He who wishes to fight must first the cost. I have no idea why being stationed anywhere other than Bragg would lose your daughter, however, I would pick what is in her best interest. Also, if it will create a hardship by not staying at Bragg, such as losing your family, you can leverage a compassionate assignment. It doesn't fit the normal description of what that is, however not knowing more about your particular situation I would recommend talking with your branch directly.
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you need to sit back whats important to you your daughter or the millitary, find something outside that will support her as well as you, its up to you and nobodey here can give you the right choice unless they've walked in your boots
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1. Reconcile with your ex and be smart/adaptable
2. Put Army first since that is your employer and pay the bills
3. Put your daughter first, and take a chance on the outside. There is always good opportunities outside the Army if you are willing to work hard for it. No one owe us a living, and we have to prove our worth to collect that pay check.
4. Be an entrepreneur, start a business so that you do not need a job. Rich Dad Poor Dad is a free podcast.
5. I am sure you have a winning personallity, and get a rich lady to marry you and be successful on relationships this time.
choices are all yours, young man!
2. Put Army first since that is your employer and pay the bills
3. Put your daughter first, and take a chance on the outside. There is always good opportunities outside the Army if you are willing to work hard for it. No one owe us a living, and we have to prove our worth to collect that pay check.
4. Be an entrepreneur, start a business so that you do not need a job. Rich Dad Poor Dad is a free podcast.
5. I am sure you have a winning personallity, and get a rich lady to marry you and be successful on relationships this time.
choices are all yours, young man!
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Why is this not discrimination? The judge flat out said your military service is why he will not let you have custody? Can you ask for a Guardian Ad Litum ? (spelling sorry)
An independent custody review investigation may help if your state allows them and follows their guidelines.
If you are a sole parent, you can not join Active Duty. Occasionally you can join Reserves.
An independent custody review investigation may help if your state allows them and follows their guidelines.
If you are a sole parent, you can not join Active Duty. Occasionally you can join Reserves.
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SPC (Join to see)
That's precisely why I want to avoid getting out. I can go Reserve as a single parent, but not Active. It is discriminatory, however, the judge's ruling is based upon my financial ability to make a trip to see my daughter that my ex-wife would not be able to make. So he saw it best for my daughter to live with her mom for the time being, until I live locally.
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SSG (Join to see)
I would write the bar association. A Judge can not, not award placement, because you are the better parent and it would be a financial hardship on the other parent to visit. Nor can they blatantly cite military Service as a reason for non custody.
However, a sly judge will word his judgment so its not so obvious. Depending on how you want to play it, a lawyer may find a way to sue the city. (civil suit for discrimination)
Been there, done that, got the T shirt.
However, a sly judge will word his judgment so its not so obvious. Depending on how you want to play it, a lawyer may find a way to sue the city. (civil suit for discrimination)
Been there, done that, got the T shirt.
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How old is your daughter?
Me personally I would go NoA DEPENDING on the relationship i have with my ex-wife or baby momma. I cant be with my kids and not support them.
Thats a tough choice. HRC cant do NOTHING?
Me personally I would go NoA DEPENDING on the relationship i have with my ex-wife or baby momma. I cant be with my kids and not support them.
Thats a tough choice. HRC cant do NOTHING?
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SPC (Join to see)
The 11B Airborne slots are over strength. So I am kind of stuck. Because they do not want to send me. However, I'm being given a lot of advice (as seen above) that really help. Maybe one of them will work out!
Also, my daughter is 2. And I am her absolute favorite person. That child is my world. I would never voluntarily lose my daughter. hence my asking how others would handle this. because I am lost in the sauce here.
Also, my daughter is 2. And I am her absolute favorite person. That child is my world. I would never voluntarily lose my daughter. hence my asking how others would handle this. because I am lost in the sauce here.
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That's a very tough decision. Have you talked to your career adviser/counselor in regards to your situation? I for one, would stay in due to benefits and pay. I am a family person as well and it's a main theme within my life but I must do what I have to do have my family prosper. That's my honest opinion.
Find some guidance within your adviser. Check with a detailer and get inputs on how to gain custody of your child and still serve. Research, research, research.
Best of luck to you.
Find some guidance within your adviser. Check with a detailer and get inputs on how to gain custody of your child and still serve. Research, research, research.
Best of luck to you.
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SPC (Join to see)
My ex-wife was given the temporary custody. But the same judge is presiding over the permanent case. And he made it clear that if I want to regain custody, I would have to be stationed local (meaning, Bragg).
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PO1 (Join to see)
SPC (Join to see) - That's not for him to decide. You are at the needs of the Army. You shouldn't be punished for doing what you do. How about re-assigning temp custody to family members, your parents, grandparents?
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SPC (Join to see)
I'm currently looking into it. My ex-wife is NOT stable, nor reliable. Which is why I am pushing so hard to get back so that I can take my daughter back. At least then, I know she'll be taken care of and provided for in more ways than just a financial hope.
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PO1 (Join to see)
Make sure to have documentation, witness and information that can support your claim that your ex-wife is as you say, unstable. Play your cards right.
Best of luck to you.
Best of luck to you.
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