What is the best prank you have pulled on a new butter bar?

Actually none

I'm an Aussie - the old 'drop bear' prank. Poor US Sgt stayed in his APC on a hot summer's day, scared shiteless of a drop bear getting him!

Asked the LT to look for the Humvee Keys

Not me but right before I joined my platoon in Germany they had convinced our LT that his desk was one in the common area of the platoon offices. He sat out there for a good week before the PSG finally stopped messing with him,

You know the best way to train a LT?

My brother and his fellow NCO's took their LT's clothes while he was in the shower and left him with a belly dancer outfit to walk the FOB.

Actually, though, as I think about it, when I was at USAF OTS, I was told I had one really irksome habit, of constantly apologizing. So, one day, amusimglyx, a group of those in my flight after I'd been recycled finally called !e into a roo!m. Forgetting what day it was, they'd gotten me a cake for my birthday, with the following in icing: 'It's my birthday, and I'm sorry." Yes, actually, that is a true story, lol, mortified though I am to admit it now, lol....

Left a message on his board to contact Major Storm, and the phone number. It was the number to weather.

I was a maintenance flight chief on Minuteman ICBMs in North Dakota. Maintenance teams would dispatch up to 100 miles in the North Dakota boonies to repair an off alert sortie. I was an E-6 with about 12 years of field experience supervising a bunch of two person maintenance teams. Someone at SAC thought it would be a good idea to have “flight officers” made up of brand new 2LTs. Flight officer training was about 3 weeks long where the newly commissioned 22 or 23 year old lieutenants would learn little more than “the pointy end goes up.” I had the task of taking a rather attractive young 2LT to Hotel 09 for her first field trip. After a journey of about 90 miles through blowing snow and temps in the teens we finally arrived at the launch facility (silo) where we were cleared to enter by the on-site team chief and Flight Security Controller.

After I parked the truck she looked at me and said, “I really have to pee.” I told her the latrine was downstairs in the soft support building right next to the Pepsi machine. She said she’d be right back.

She climbed downstairs (the SSB is below grade) and within 30 seconds came up and got back in the truck. She looked over with a really red face and called me a “mother*^@*%.” That was it. I couldn’t stop laughing and neither could she. I explained you either do your business by the fence or take the folding toilet seat with little plastic bags but YOU were responsible for disposing the contents. She chose the latter. Another lesson well learned.