What is the best way to tell your unit that you in no way shape or form want an ETS award from them?

I don't believe in ETS or PCS awards, unless the soldier did something above and beyond. Otherwise, they are just like participation trophies...

If they're making you write your own anyway just write yourself up a silver star. When it gets kicked back tell the CO/1SG that you have no idea why it wasn't approved, they'll just have to fix it.

Was never a problem in USMC that I was aware of, because awards were hard to come by. Other than being recognized for Valor or a specific achievement, awards were for End of Tour or End of Service. If the member was also retiring and requested a ceremony or formation then the appropriate End of Service award would be presented, and often roses for the wife. There were unwritten accepted norms regarding level of award based on rank, but usually not so much so for Valor. Most enlisted MOH citations over the years ended with "he gallantly gave his life for his country". I don't ever recall anyone being told to write up their own award or refusing any award.

I think the best ETS award you can give to anybody is a DD214. My ETS award was a reduction to PFC and 45/45 3 or 4 months before I supposed to ETS. >:( Still got out with an honorable and a good re-enlistment. Did IRR until my mandatory time was up. :D

Never had this problem, There was no such thing as an ETS award. On the night before my ETS, I, as Range Safety NCO, put two battalions of Infantry through a familiarization course with the sniper scope. I closed out the range, caught a few hours sleep, had breakfast, turned in my bedding, said goodbye to my platoon and friends and went to the orderly room and signed my DD214.

I'd tell them, "Hey guys, I appreciate the thought and gesture, but I don't want any personal recognition. Thank you for your support!"

I've seen top notch soldiers who weren't in the click get bullshit ETS and Pcs Awards. And I've seen race based awards given to slackers way above their performance based on race of CMD race. The Army is a microcosm of society. It doesn't run by the book or in a vacuum. It sucks often, but it's the best in the world.

Yip awards systems pretty much are a crock, unless you are getting one lol, plenty of people have written or been told to write their own awards, NCOERS, and many other things over a career. I actually despise this activity to its core. All that is is a bunch of lazy NCO's and Officers that do not care about soldiers. I blame both because when it comes to awards this is the only time that shit rolls up hill lmao. Officers are the worst, and they are extremely lazy when recommendations come up for awards they do not want to spend the time and energy on to see that it gets to the right approval authority. So they blanket some bullshit off a ARCOM and send it back as a downgrade fully knowing what they are doing.

When I retired from the USAF my commander asked me to write my own MSM. I told him I would provide bullets but the award would do little for me after retirement. I did, he did and I received the award in front of my family. It was a big deal to them. I felt like I earned it but should have received it earlier when it could have helped toward promotion.

Having seen this issue from both sides, my personal opinion is this: I did and do my job to the best of my ability because that is how I was raised, and what I believe. I think the ubiquity of end-of-tour awards has rendered them almost meaningless. Many of my Marines and troops performed truly outstanding work, and I always wrote them up for the highest awards I thought appropriate, knowing that the chain of command was going to downgrade them- but I wanted to recognize them. I always pulled them aside and explained that I wasn't "giving" them an award, but that I, personally, thought that they deserved it. As for myself, I have actual heroes in my family, and I feel that by accepting an award of this nature that I am doing a disservice to their memory. Napoleon said that men would die for bits of ribbon and metal when no rationale reason could persuade them to…and I think I'm smart enough to know the difference.

To me, it counts on the situation. I was stationed in Germany and was working in the orderly room (not by choice) when our unit got called for deployment for Desert Shield/Storm/Calm. When it came to loading up our equipment, it was a Saturday and no one (not the OPS SGT, 1SGT, XO, or the CDR) came in to help pack up the Company HQ items. It was just me (SGT at the time) did it all by myself. When we got into the AOR, I had to carry three weapons (two not mine), three laptops (in carrying cases) and my two duffle bags. Not one soldier offer to help. When we got back from deployment, our unit was being disbanded (7th CORPS), my PCS award was a Letter of Appreciation. I stood in front of the unit took it, shook hands, saluted. When I got back in formation, I rip it up and threw it away. It was a big slap in the face. That was my situation.

Well if your unit is like mine you would be O.C.S. for a year or more before it got approved anyway.. so just keep your head down and quietly leave.
I joke as I see people inprocess that they should start their PCS awards now so maybe they can get it before they leave.. lol

I med boarded out after 15.5 years...I didn't even get a good bye.....never mind an ETS award....I was considered useless by the CoC I guess.....

Been retired now since 05. Got a few awards that are still packed away...not because I didn't appreciate them, been busy remodeling a house.... Learned a few things though while active. An award is Not for the civilians, it is for us, the military. If we did not recognize service and commitment, we would fail to develop good leaders....and yes I have known a few fools get awards.... If your unit feels you deserve this, then provide everything you are asked to....set the example, show your troops what Eprit de Corps is. I too was asked to "write" my own EPR and an award... When I asked my supervisor why he bluntly told me, because I should know and always be aware of what I am doing and how I want to be seen..... also, it was much needed training for the future... I eventually had to write over 70 LOE's in theater in Kuwait, for my troops before end of deployment... Forced me to learn to pay attention to them, what they did or did not do daily, our mission and how well we completed it and how to convey that to their leadership back home. Once I started doing that, it made me a better NCO and taught me to really keep track of what was going on around me and with my troops. Once I got home I was slammed with having to write two EPR's with damn little to go on..... no thanks to my Shop chief.

Take it, appreciate it... Hang it on your wall, and be proud... but, if you still think it's a waste of time in the military, that attitude will carry over into a civilian job.... and some of those jobs employ fellow former military members.

Just suck it up and accept the award. I did that after my OIF deployment 10 years ago, because I was mad at the unit and had "my integrity". Turns out, I was a petulant child-disappointed my next higher. Learn from an old mustang...

I have stood in your boots, ETS'ing, hating my unit of assignment, knowing I would never, ever, wear the uniform again. Years later I stood on the other side and realized how individual awards impact unit cohesion and morale. Whatever you do, be gracious. It will not kill you to let them pin a small piece of ribbon and metal on you. But, be careful. After ETS I burned everything but my 214. Years later I would regret not being able to prove certain things about my service.

A lot of guys quietly hate their military experience usually due to abusive chains of command but go thru their enlistment doing their job well anyway. This strikes me as a case where a soldier seems to be telling his chain of command "You treated me like a piece of $&!+ for four years, treated the people around me the same way, and now you want me to smile, shake your hand, and pretend it's all been great. No thank you. Just let me go in peace.

First, I would check to see when your exit interview is. Every unit I have been to has given me one. That would be the time to air your concerns. Take the award, even if you have to write it. If the place is as bad as the implication is, you probably more than earned it!

As a former member of the same unit, I fully agree with this sentiment. I served with SGT Camron and he was one of the few NCOs who took care of his soldiers in the unit. I'm sure some of you lifers will try to flame this post but the fact of the matter is, he is right.

If what you say is true then it shouldn't be a problem. Eventually you will be asked to write the award, at which time you can do what Soldiers all over the world have been good for centuries - stall until it's too late for it to matter.
If someone DOES step up and writes you an award, then grin and bear it. It means that someone other than you sees that you contributed to the readiness and strength of your unit. Respect their effort and receive the award with the honor and dignity expected of a Noncommissioned Officer.