Posted on Apr 20, 2016
What is the goofiest thing you did in the military?
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It was my first field problem as an armor PL. It was TF on TF so half the brigade was out there. My platoon was responsible for guarding a large hill and I drew the sector sketch. I drew the primary, alternate, and supplementary positions but never labeled them as such. Somehow I lost the sector sketch and the red forces got a hold of it. They looked at my sketch and found 12 tanks on the hill by my drawings. It became great disinformation and caused the red force avenue of attack to change right into the teeth of our TF. It became comical as my platoon was moved from the hill. I suspect I never got an ass chewing because we did so well. lol
Edited >1 y ago
Posted >1 y ago
Responses: 36
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I kept asking the legal rep "hypotheticals" during one of my deployments. As an example, "If I weld pitch forks to my brush guard so I don't have to stop for road kill is this considered poaching? Would it make a difference if I had tags for the animal?"
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Once when one of my coworkers asked me a question, I didn't catch it but pretended I did. So I pretended to think hard about it, then slowly began to hip thrust. Without missing a beat, my coworker then began to do the Stayin' Alive dance from Saturday Night Fever, and we both turned while still dancing to our NCOIC who could only stare at is with one eyebrow raised like, "What the..."
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As a 2nd LT in '84 I was advon at Graf and while waiting for the main body to arrive we had plenty of time on our hands. As such, a few soldiers convinced me to ride into a small town to visit a Gausthous (sic). While there I discovered Uzo and finished off a great deal. All I remember going back is that I was riding on the hood of the 1/4 ton guiding us through the dark. How we made it back to the cantonment area without the MPs finding out I will never know.
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CPT Joseph K Murdock
lol it could have been so bad if you were caught. Does UZO give you a different buzz?
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LTC (Join to see)
It definitely does give you a different buzz. I still remember it to this day! And yes, it would have been much different had I been caught. Of course I can say that about the many other nutty things I did as a JO :)
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CPT Joseph K Murdock It seemed a few hours before AM CQ duty that 1SG Shaw was urging young PFC me to have 'another'. He thought it was funny when he came into the orderly room and saw me spewing, (sure - tomato juice will settle your stomach), into his waste basket.
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when I graduated basic training and AIT I went and bought used green jungle boots and I faded all my uniforms. I figured that it would look better to be seasoned like someone who got busted down than to appear new. As an MP on the gate and can't even tell you how many people stopped and asked my what I got busted down for!
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CPT Joseph K Murdock
After 9-11 my unit became fully engaged as gate guards. I did some rotations with them as a CPT and ruined the protocol as the driver and I tried to render a salute as quickly as possible.
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Lord there are lots. As a newb someone bet me $20 I wouldn't low crawl thru the mub/sand pit we created as a concrete pouring simulation. Needless to say I got hosed down by 1st Sgt. Black out FOB lightning I had found an early 80s Honda motorcycle near our job site that I thought would look nice in my tent, I bunked with Humit chicks so I guess I wanted to impress. I go out after all is quite and I inched that thing but it was squeaking every time the wheel rolled. I got a little paranoid that the guards in the guard tower would light my ass up so I ended up parking it in the middle of the job site. The next morning the platoon sgt gave a speech, "Blah, blah, blah, responsibility, blah, whoever brought this motorcycle out here after this formation better move it back" his mouth dropped when it was my ass moving it back. Also went rouge after I was left on Bagram, was told Marmel was men only, so I started base hopping from the PAX terminal and went all over RC North OEF 2014. There are other stupid things that shall not be discussed.
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I caught a baby rattlesnake and deposited it outside our PATRIOT site. I caught it by hand, dumped it in an empty sandbag and carried it a safe distance outside the wire before letting it go.
Never liked killing stuff that doesn't need to be killed.
Battery Commander, 1SG and Platoon Sergeant were pretty pissed.
On the other hand, it was a really s****y long (45 day) FTX, and we hadn't been back from OIF 1 a month yet.
Never liked killing stuff that doesn't need to be killed.
Battery Commander, 1SG and Platoon Sergeant were pretty pissed.
On the other hand, it was a really s****y long (45 day) FTX, and we hadn't been back from OIF 1 a month yet.
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SFC Marcus Belt
CPT Joseph K Murdock - We asked the same thing. The Battalion Commander made it extraordinarily painful for us. Padlocks on the motorpool gate, a convoy op from Ft. Bliss to Yuma, two weeks of 18 hour days in the motorpool checking 5988s....don't even get me started on how silly it was.
And when he made the cooks serve food at breakfast, lunch AND dinner IN the motorpool, and required non-meal card holders to be escorted to and from the DFAC by their platoon sergeants, that was WAY beyond reasonable.
I'd forgotten how much I dislike that man.
And when he made the cooks serve food at breakfast, lunch AND dinner IN the motorpool, and required non-meal card holders to be escorted to and from the DFAC by their platoon sergeants, that was WAY beyond reasonable.
I'd forgotten how much I dislike that man.
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SSG John Jensen
friend in commo had a nice life-like rubber snake, in the field he would lean his rifle against a tree put the snake at the base and walk away. We would all watch some NCO sneak up to the rifle to snatch it, the laugh at his screams when he saw the rubber snake
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