Posted on Nov 18, 2016
What is the most military-appropriate name you've encountered in the military?
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Posted 9 y ago
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I had a couple buddies in Germany with military appropriate names, we were all SGTs so just think of their name with SGT in front; Slaughter, and Major.
It was a kick when Major would answer the phone "SGT Major, how can I help you" and folks would say "oh wrong number and hang up, or he'd call for a piece of equipment and someone would drop what they were doing and haul butt over to the shop and get a puzzled look and say you aren't the Sergeant Major, and he'd tell them he never said he was THE Sergeant Major just that he WAS Sergeant Major.
It was all good fun till someone told The SGM, for some reason he failed to see any humor in it.
It was a kick when Major would answer the phone "SGT Major, how can I help you" and folks would say "oh wrong number and hang up, or he'd call for a piece of equipment and someone would drop what they were doing and haul butt over to the shop and get a puzzled look and say you aren't the Sergeant Major, and he'd tell them he never said he was THE Sergeant Major just that he WAS Sergeant Major.
It was all good fun till someone told The SGM, for some reason he failed to see any humor in it.
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LCpl Darrell J. Farley Jr.
SGT Stuart Griffin I was in the Marines with a Sgt Swallow, and Cpl Face. As luck(?) would have it they had a slight disagreement at the E Club over the weekend. Monday morning, standing formation at 0700, the First Sergeant came busting out of the Barracks Hatch and screamed out, “Give me Face and Swallow, RIGHT NOW!!!” You should have seen a whole Company at attention trying to stifle laughter! Even the Company Gunnery Sergeant out front of us all to pass the “Word” was smiling and holding back a laugh. 1st Sgt realized what he just announced to 120 Marines, said “Go% D£!# IT! You know what I mean!!!”
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LCpl Darrell J. Farley Jr.
Lt Col Paul Maxwell worked for the Navy as Civil Service, worked along side a retired Army Major named Minor!!! Major Minor!!!
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SPC Eric McInteer
Sergeants Major, present company excluded, tend to have a very poor sense of humor. Must be from chasing people off their grass all day.
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Marines.. went to basic in the Army with a kid named Marines.. So one tape said US ARMY, other said MARINES.... drill sergeant accused him of having an identity crisis
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SGT Alan Dike
SGT Michael Wyatt - I may have one of the least military like names lol.. I was someones very own private dike. They left me alone in basic, surprisingly. So I'm bored, in chow line.. lean over and offer to trade off blouses with the guy next to me.. cause no way can he have a worst last name than I do. Wrong. Of the 200+ folks in my company.. and I chose the one guy with a worst last name. His name.. Glasscock, he was private glasscock...
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CPL Calynn Duffey
I had a 1SG Anger. Despite the name, he was one of the most levelheaded individuals I've had the pleasure of serving with
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My English professor (Dr. Justice) has a brother who was an NCO, SGT. Justice.
Later became a police officer after he got out, so he was Officer Justice.
Later became a police officer after he got out, so he was Officer Justice.
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SGT (Join to see)
I'm an MP and we got SPC Justice in our unit. He texted me one time when I didn't have him saved in my contacts "This is Justice." I laughed so hard and responded with "This is Honor... because it was an honor receiving that text."
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PFC Drinkwater--I told him that his name obligated him to become a drill sergeant.
I've also met Privates Hooker, Bacardi, and Smirnoff.
I've also met Privates Hooker, Bacardi, and Smirnoff.
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SSG (Join to see)
PVT Hooker remains in my memory at basic training, because the DS allowed him to do pushups with a broken hand and cast.
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MAJ Shannon Read
I often had to call in for Admin info to Ft Knox to a MAJ Hooker. What made it worse was when I was around my teenage daughter when I had to call in, she would be in the background laughing.
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I had a MAJ Minor in my unit. On side note, on my last deployment some thought it would be funny to "promote" me to MAJ, so some could say there was a MAJ Surprise coming into theater.
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SPC Christopher Wilson
I knew a Joe Last name BOOTY
I was on baggage detail when I was going home from Deployment His last name was PLAYER he told me that it was a sort of Ellis Island screw up when his great great grandpa joined the Aemy. Got to love Admin
I was on baggage detail when I was going home from Deployment His last name was PLAYER he told me that it was a sort of Ellis Island screw up when his great great grandpa joined the Aemy. Got to love Admin
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I was CQ during lunch, everyday someone had to stay back and answer phones well it just so happened to be my day. Anyway, Soldiers, Marines, Airman and sailors liked to prank ( I was in a joint unit) And Col. Pancake need a ride from Tampa Int'l. So I told him to flapjack his ass to MacDill and he might get there quicker. Two hours later Bird Colonel Pancake showed up at the unit. The rest you can probably guess
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Ah, here we go, my first BN XO was overweight and was named MAJOR PIGG. Then I believe our intelligence guy at BN level was CPT JUSTICE. I saw a SGT CHRISTMAS once.
My favorite are the leftover clones from the cloning program in the 1980's. The Army conducted a cloning program in the 1980's for Infantry Units. Each cloned Soldier was named SGT RIVERIA, I'll bet there are a few left serving now in Infantry Units with that same name. Seemed at least one Infantry Company always had at least one SGT RIVERIA issued. When confronted they would always deny they were a clone and would go off on some long boring explanation on how it was a common last name where they came from.........yeah right, and Army CID doesn't plant spies in units either. :)
My favorite are the leftover clones from the cloning program in the 1980's. The Army conducted a cloning program in the 1980's for Infantry Units. Each cloned Soldier was named SGT RIVERIA, I'll bet there are a few left serving now in Infantry Units with that same name. Seemed at least one Infantry Company always had at least one SGT RIVERIA issued. When confronted they would always deny they were a clone and would go off on some long boring explanation on how it was a common last name where they came from.........yeah right, and Army CID doesn't plant spies in units either. :)
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SFC William H.
Gotta watch out for those "replacements and TDY guys"........they still don't do that do they?
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SPC Erich Guenther
SFC William H. - LMAO, yeah we had a PV2 that knew the load plan for a M901A1 inside and out right after OSUT. His excuse was his father was a Sergeant Major...........we called him CID-NEY anyway.
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Went to basic with a kid called Fagett. The drill sgts went to TOWN on him. "Where's that fagett"!! " Come here fagett"!!! " "Fagett, front and center"!!! The worse was when someone couldn't do the exercises, they would scream " your fucking pathetic, you should be like this Fagett here"!!!!
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1LT (Join to see)
I'm guessing that would be frowned upon in Basic now... Such fun all these rules make impossible
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