Posted on Apr 22, 2016
SSG Bethany Viglietta
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I am an Army Recruiter and it would be great to share.

As we gear up to ship out some of our first female Future Soldiers in combat jobs, I ask of the members of RP, what is your advice for these young soldiers?

Please keep it constructive and nothing along the lines of they shouldn't be able to serve in these positions because that ship has sailed and opinions about how they should not serve in these positions are not going to change anything.

Edit: The conversation among RP members about mentoring these service members is amazing. Honestly, I did not know what to expect when I started the thread, because this is a subject many feel strong about. Thank you so much for all of your advice thus far, I cannot wait to share it with our female and male recruits and hope you share it in your ranks/communities as well. Together we are molding the future of the military.
Edited 8 y ago
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Responses: 403
PFC Assistant Gunner
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Ssg I may only have been in a hot minute but my advice from my limited experience is this.....tell them that they can't act like they are entitled to anything extra and to expect to be on the receiving end of some disdain. Tell them to pt on their own using the male standard and to constantly strive to be better then all their male counterparts
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SN William Besold
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Only i can say girls do you job and watch your back and make your ship mates proud
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CPT Erik Eriksen
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I come from a time that having women in combat units was unthinkable. However, even then, there were only two thoughts on my mind: "Mission first and men (people) always." Having said that, I think that there are three points that I would like to make.
1. You have to train and be prepared to complete the mission at all times. You will not be treated equally...you are a minority. You will have to work harder and smarter to be considered an equal. It may not be fair, but it is a function of being a minority. This will change, over time, but slowly. If you have questions about this comment, ask a black or Hispanic soldier (depending on the demographics of your unit) how they feel.
2. Regardless of how the last ten or twenty years has brought this male/female equality to the point we are at now, there are hundreds (or thousands) of years of culture we are trying to over turn. Do not expect it all to happen at once. I am not only talking about sexual attitudes, but philosophical and social attitudes and manners as well. For example, if I, as a Captain, held the door for a female of lower rank, that may be good manners, but it may also seem condescending. The same for doing physical tasks. My advice is to take all of these things into consideration, take them in stride, and be professional. This may be difficult for everyone in some ways.
3. There are different attitudes based on age. Young men and women today may be able to work together very well. Your higher ranking men and women may not find this quite so easy. So be cognizant of the fact that the senior ranking people (senior NCOs and officers) may find this more of a struggle and act accordingly. These are, most likely, the people that will act the most negatively if you pull the "female" card.
In the end, remember that the mission comes first and your fellow soldiers come always. Be all you can be!
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COL Ed Mullin
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The key is upper body strength. Most women lack the upper body strength required for close combat fighting. Many young men also lack the fighting skills that were learned through experience in previous generations. Soldiers need the strength and ability to put a bayonet through the enemy's spleen even when exhausted, scared and hungry. If you have the desire and ability you will be successful.
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Cpl Stanley Richards
Cpl Stanley Richards
8 y
you are skippy right old salt
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SFC Thomas Holcomb
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It is a very tough life. The first 20 plus years I was a Field Artillery Man, 13B, D,F, E, somewhere i fit in becoming a Pathfinder, 27M, along with being Airborne, it's lonely hard stress full then after 30 i was hurt and medical Retired if anyone's ready to live in some the most ungodly places on earth then go for it and as a 92y40 in a artillery battalion hq is no cake walk
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CPL Glynnda White
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Excellent edit....all I suggest is females be treated exactly the same as men in the specialized units of the military-if they cannot pass under the given standards they should not be given the position. They should also be warned (which is fair) that if they go into combat and are captured they will very likely be subjected to rape and likely many times over. Please be reminded everyone that the US is one of a handful of nations on earth that actually practices Geneva Convention standards when it comes to prisoners. I am a first degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do, not much I know, but I trained with males, all of whom were bigger than me, and I kicked their tails just fine, my best running time was 6 min 30 sec mile, I know this is better than a good percentage of males.....I'm just sayin' women can do it if they want it, without the special treatment.....They don't need any favors from politically and/or horny males or power hungry females who need a female victim to hold on to their power. In basic I witnessed a number of females gaining "special" favors from male drills and I saw those otherwise good NCO's lose their rank. I don't like females who play this game, they are a serious insult to the women who do it the right way. I have no respect for them and I have a serious problem with women and men mixing due to experiencing this problem throughout my military career. Yes I blame the males however it was females seeking favor who instigated.....disgusting and should have been treated as sexual harassment and the "Ladies" involved given the boot out of the military. Did these females just have something to prove or did they really want to be Rangers, or was it just to further their military careers...I'm hoping it was door number two and if so that they will be frank and honest about their training without congressional inquiry...
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SFC Jim Ruether
SFC Jim Ruether
8 y
Hi CPL White,
Another great response. If you can do the job then go ahead and do it. I would however be worried about a female getting grabbed in a firefight and know that she will be tortured and raped like you have stated. I took Karate and had my hat handed to me several times by female sparring partners so you are preaching to the choir about getting an #$% kicking from a female. ha ha
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1LT Orion LaPalm
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You are part of the problem. Some of these young women are going to end up in a terrible situation and you are the one that helped put them there. I hope you are proud of yourself.
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1LT Orion LaPalm
1LT Orion LaPalm
8 y
OK then my advise is to tell them several terrible situations that could end up happening to them. If you don't, that is the same as lying to these women. If they still decide to join, you can sleep well because you gave them all the information to make a an informed decision.
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SSG Bethany Viglietta
SSG Bethany Viglietta
8 y
1LT Orion LaPalm - You keep using the words terrible situation. Do you mean Rape, sir? Or death because they are closer to the front lines?

If you mean rape/assault, this is an entirely different conversation. We should not keep women out of positions because their brothers might rape them. That's the wrong answer. The right answer is to educate EVERYONE because males can get raped as well. The only way to stop this is to educate everyone and get them to step up when something happens. Otherwise you may as well castrate everyone who joins.

If you are talking about injury or death, anyone who joins the Army learns about that danger. No job is excluded when it comes to this terrible situation.
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1LT Orion LaPalm
1LT Orion LaPalm
8 y
Thank you for helping to weaken the U.S. military. This does create an opportunity for more counselors, lawyers, and doctors though.
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CPT Richard Fematt
CPT Richard Fematt
8 y
This is all bullshit all it will lead to is new group of orphaned children without their mothers all for what the chance for equality. No one wants to say it but I'm old school and I've seen epic failure in the Marine Corps and the Army in regards to women. This is a disaster in the making. A social experiment that is going to get soldiers killed. Point blank females do not belong in combat jobs even if they meet the standards.
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SMSgt Steve Neal
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Edited 8 y ago
Agree w/ SGM Marquez that color and gender should not matter in the military. There's a lot to be said for team diversity with a positive mental attitude and for collaborating to overcome any single teammate's shortcomings. Having built a dozen award-winning teams at as many assignments, I know how to get the whole team on track for our big-picture goals instead of dwelling on our differences.
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SSG Bethany Viglietta
SSG Bethany Viglietta
8 y
SMSgt Steve Neal Yes! As long as our leaders think like this and act as professionals we will be good to go. I ran out of votes for the day, but owe you an up vote. Turns out you only get 75 votes per day.
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SMSgt Steve Neal
SMSgt Steve Neal
8 y
Thanks for your service and for the "up vote"! I truly believe the leadership deficit at the top of our executive branch is the root cause of all this dividedness and disparity throughout out military. All of us who serve have a better handle on what it takes to be good citizens than those we should look up to in D.C.
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SGT Dave Matteson
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I have worked with men and women in civilian and military police units. I will share this: I have worked with men and women who were built for the job and I have worked with men and women who should have never been in that position. Toe the line. Hold your own. Bear the burden given to you and don't let anyone give you crap. But most of all understand what you are getting yourself into. It won't be a walk in the sun and most won't want you there. Good luck and change your socks!
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TSgt Robert Carter
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As a social worker, i have seen many women traumatized by military service and how their treated both on the battlefield and off. My advice? Protect yourself and remain vigilant ladies, reconsider what you're doing and do what your loved ones want you to do. Be true to yourself always.
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