What is your funniest salute story?

I had to show up earlier then most to do extra PT one morning and when I packed, of course, I did it at the last minute. After PT I went to change into uniform and noticed in my scrambling while packing I ended up packing one summer boot and one winter boot, I figured that since I was a 13 wide it might still work and nobody would notice. 30 seconds out of the door of the changing room a sergeant stopped my noticing me wearing 2 left boots and the nickname Lefty the Firefighter began.

Basic Training, Ft Sill, OK, 1992. I was a slick sleeve private sent to do police call in an area I hadn't been before. I see a Marine Lt Col approaching, and quickly run through what my course of action should be. Somehow, in my 19 y/o private brain, I arrive at the conclusion that since he's a Marine, and I'm Army, there surely mustn't exist an inter-service expectation of rendering respect and courtesy, right? So I didn't salute that jarhead light colonel. He took notice of that fact.

--- Turns out there is, in fact, an inter-service expectation of rendering respect and courtesy. It also turns out that USMC 0-5s are quite adept at educating and communicating with dumbass Army privates on said courtesies. He hurt me, y'all! Wow. Just wow...

Walking into the PX at Camp Taji, I saluted a Marine 2nd Lt. He didn't return the salute, just said, "Don't salute me Private! We are in a warzone!"

Basic combat training, Fort Bliss Texas, March 1977. Me and another trainee were double timing across the parking lot as trainees always double time. My friend was smoking a cigarette in his right hand as we approached a captain. We continued to double time not yet learning the proper way to salute and my friend saluted with his left hand holding a cigarette in his right. The captain ordered us to halt and fortunately he was a chaplain. He explained the proper procedure and had us back up and do it again.

I was at my tech school, a rankless E-1, where we had members of foreign militaries attending for their own education. I shattered my arm, was finally out of the sling, and on my way to a medical appointment when I saw an officer from one of the foreign branches advancing. At the time, I could not salute. My right arm was the one I shattered and when they pierced it back together, it wouldn’t fully rotate, so when I raised my arm, my palm would be facing the sky, and I’d been informed since I couldn’t do it correctly, not to salute. Not knowing protocol as to whether I we’re technically required to salute or not, I adjusted course down a side path to avoid him before we got close to be on the safe side, then turned around and waited for him to pass. Of course, this happened to be the way he was going and nearly ran into me. He froze, I froze. He waited a few seconds and then looked at my rankless sleeves and immediately saluted me. I instantly panicked and waved for him to lower his hands, explaining I was an enlisted trainee and unable to salute. We were both horribly embarrassed but it gave us both a good laugh

I was a recruit in boot camp. Ft Rucker, 1966. Walking along minding my own business, I met two officers, and when it became apparent that my path would take me between the two, I panicked. Not wanting to slight either, I saluted with both hands. They both laughed out loud, and I got to drop and give them 20.

When I was in basic training, I was walking and suddenly noticed that the driver of an oncoming vehicle was an officer so I saluted. It caught him so off guard that he saluted me with his left hand.

I was stationed at USARV HQ in Long Binh in 1969-70 and was walking toward the building I worked in one day after mess with a good friend. We were arguing about something and I was facing him (to my right) and he suddenly started poking me in the side and I was pissed so I pushed him and then looked up and General Creighton Abrams was about 5 feet away from me. I saluted so quickly I knocked off my boonie hat and saw Abrams chuckle as returned my half ass salute as he walked by. Glad he had a sense of humor !!!!!!

Couple of stories, none since I became a chaplain.
Pre-chaplain life I was a midshipman in rotc at Georgia Tech. I’d had Colors in the afternoon before going home for the weekend, and was going to help my high school army jrotc at the football game, so i was in khakis. Apparantly a Chief Petty Officer from the town had been asked to sing the National anthem, very nicely done, but as i was talking to some of the jrotc cadets, i see him out of the corner of my eye, kind of doing the sideways-walk-looking-at-something-without-wanting-to-be-seen walk. He was totally focusing on my garrison cover with the MIDN anchor and eisenhower jacket with absolutely nothing. You know, “what the heck is that, and do i salute it?” So as i was still talking I did the subtlest “no” headshake i could, which must have relieved him because he came right over and talked with us.
Second story. NROTC at Tech again. MIDN officers wear a series of small gold bars on their khaki collars and garrison coverts. AFROTC wears other stuff. Tech had Army ROTC, but only 12 cadets. AFROTC c/1LT passes our MIDN XO, A MIDN CDR, and doesnt salute, but proceeds to stop the group with him and chew them all out, at which point the MIDN CDR literally pulls on his collar and says *bling*. Its like , 5 gold bars crammed onto his collar. The c/1LT was saluting a while.
Last story, told to us staff officers at fork and knife school. A medical service guy was commissioned a LTJG (O-2); on the dress blues thats a 1/2” stripe and a 1/4” stripe. He was proud of himself apparantly, and as he walked out of the O-club post-graduation, he saw a gentleman with only one stripe approaching. Basking in his one and a half stripe, he waited for the lowly one-striper to salute. When the one-striper failed to salute, he stopped the gentleman, “excuse me, but just a pointer on naval courtsey, I have two stripes, that means i’m a lieutenant. You only have one stripe Ensign, so you’re supposed to salute me.” The guy with the one-stripe officer leans in and says, “um, lieutenant, his ‘one stripe’ is pretty thick. As in, Admiral thick. This is Rear Admiral XXXXX.” (Navy 1-stars wear a 2” stripe). Needless to say, that LTJG got to have a looooong discussion with his former teachers at fork and knife school.
I’ve already posted elsewhere the story of my dad shocking the 1st Cav MajGen because “a dental officer knew how to salute!”

January 1979, Fort William D. Davis, Panama
PVT (Not PV2) Vaughn reports to his first duty station since graduating Fort Benning. With a Benning buzz cut. Wearing black BCGs. And khakis. Which have no rank insignia on the sleeve since he is an E-1.

I quickly found out that senior NCOs don't always have a sense of humor when they salute a buck private.