What is your funniest salute story?

When I was in basic me and 3 other airmen were marching to get supplies, an older marine was walking towards us and we could tell what his rank was because of the matt black on dark green rank on his collar. I figured better be safe than sorry so I called the guys to salute. Right after he comes running up to me and gets in my TI screaming, asking why we were saluting, do his stripes look like an oak cluster, am I blind, all that. As soon as he waits for me to speak (all of us still holding the salute) I say "Sir, I noticed you were a marine gunnery Sgt, and though it is not required I thought I would show you some respect, sir" he asked who my TI was, finally returned the salute and left. He did go and talk to our TI also.

In 1984 I was an E6 (promotable) in the Guard, in order to sign up for active duty I was reduced to PV1. Figuring I was screwed over by my recruiter I went to the COSCOM library and spent hours researching regulations to figure out why.
As I was walking down the steps exiting the building I was watching my feet to keep from tripping, preoccupied by everything I had read. I passed 3 people, when I heard someone scream "SOLDIER". I stopped and turned around when a young female 2LT got in my face and asked if I thought I didn't have to salute an officer. Thinking "O shit" to myself I snapped off a salute and said "sorry sir". The 2 E7's with her just about died laughing, meanwhile I did a smart about face and marched off laughing to myself.

Korea 2nd Inf Div. camp Casey 1979, DAY 1. Green sedan approaching, flashing red lights in the front grill. I step to the side of the road to get out of the way and let the vehicle pass. As it passes me it begins to slow down and stop. I turn around and a man with a pearl handle side arm exits the rear door, that when I notice the star on his cap, I snap to attention. General Leslie politely informs me to salute his vehicle. Being new in country he went easy on me, thank goodness.

Leaving a school building, and half way out the door, I suddenly saw an officer coming in through the same door. I slipped past him with a quick left handed salute...and kept going at a fast pace.

I had a quadruple by pass at the Army Medical in Hawaii performed by then heart surgeon..Major Error...now retired ...thank you and forever thankful retired Colonel Error.

Deck crew on the Ciast Guard cutter u was stationed on realized the officers rarely return ear or even noticed a salute. We decided to see who could give the sloppiest salute, my rapid salute with only my middle finger ‘‘twas chosen as the winner

When I got out of AIT (2003) I was stationed to the 10th Mountain Air Cav in Northern New York. I apparently said or done something to get the attention of Maj. Gen. Hagenbeck. So, I was tasked to help with a BBQ and MG showed up with his driver, was greeted by none other than CSM Troxell. They exchanged words summoned me over, I listened to him speak praises of guys like me and so forth. I was so nervous, when he shook my hand all the sudden there was a coin in it, I panicked, saluted with my left hand and I knew it was more f*cked up than a football bat but stuck with it. He saluted me back, I walked away dying inside and I swear nobody spoke for the next 5 minutes!

We were deployed to Pohang Korea in 1986 and we had a no salute zone in our camp simulating combat conditions.Sometimes when a group of us were approaching officers we would reach our hands up like we were adjusting our covers and most of the time while our hands were going down the officers would start to salute.

LIBYA NORTH AFRICA MISURATA
1952
RADAR SITE
THIS IS A STORY THAT TOOK PLACE IN A 20 MAN RADAR SITE. I WAS PART OF THIS GROUP SETTING UP THE SITE.
THIS INCLUDED MAKING LATRINE PITS, POST HOLES ETC.
THE USE OF A PORTABLE PNEUMATIC HAMMER BECAUSE THE TOPSOIL WAS ONLY ABOUT 3 INCHES DEEP AND THE REST WAS ROCK. A CIVILIAN WAS ON SITE THAT HANDLED OUR DYNAMITE. I/WE WOULD DRILL INTO THE ROCK AND THE DYNAMITE TECH. WOULD PLACE THE DYNAMITE CAP INTO THE END OF THE DYNAMITE AND INSERT IT INTO THE DRILLED HOLE. IF IT DID NOT BLOW THE AREA WAS SEALED OFF AND ANOTHER HOLE WAS STARTED.
WE ALL LIVED IN TENTS. THREE OFFICERS IN ONE TENT AND THE REST SHARED OTHER TENTS. I HAD A RUNNING FRIENDLY FEUD WITH MY FRIEND BOB LAMARSH AND TOLD HIM THAT I WOULD GET SOME DYNAMITE AND BLOW HIS BUTT UP.
I FOUND A BROOM AND SAWED THE HANDLE INTO THE LENGTHS OF THE DYNAMITE, MADE A HOLE ON EACH END TO PUT THE DYNAMITE CAP WIRES INTO. I PLACED THIS ON A PIECES OF PLYWOOD ALONG WITH MY OLD WIND UP ALARM CLOCK AND LARGE LANTERN BATTERY. I FOUND DYNAMITE CAP WIRES AND ATTACHED THEM TO THE CLOCK AND BATTERY. I THEN PLACED IT UNDER BOB’S BED THEN I WENT TO OUR BEER/REC TENT. AFTER A WHILE BOB LEFT AND IN A FEW MINUTES RETURNED HOLDING THE “BOMB”. OUR MEDIC TOOK ONE LOOK AND GASPED… IT’S A B..B…BOMB. BOB YELLED THAT IT WASN’T AND SAID THAT I MADE IT.
WELL, TWO AIRMEN TOOK THE “BOMB” OVER TO THE OFFICER’S TENT AND PUT IN UNDER A BED. THE OFFICERS WERE IN MISURATA. I WENT TO OUR MESS TENT THAT WAS FACING THEIR TENT. IT WAS DARK AND I SAT LOOKING THROUGH THE TOW TARGET SCREEN. (THE TOW TARGET SCREENS WHEN USED FOR AERIAL TARGET PRACTICE WAS THEN USED ON ALL THE TENTS.) ALL THE TENTS HAD A 55 GAL METAL BARREL FILLED WITH WATER AND A BUCKET NEXT TO IT IN CASE OF FIRE. IT WAS ABOUT 11:00 WHEN LT. MIRANDA AND LT. WALLENSCHAGER RETURNED IN THEIR JEEP. THEY WENT IN AND ONE YELLED AND THREW THE BED ASIDE, GRABBED A FIRE EXTINGUISHER SPRAYING IT ON THE “BOMB” WHILE THE OTHER OFFICER RAN OUT FILLED THE BUCKET WITH FOUL WATER, RAN BACK IN AND THREW IT ON THE “BOMB”. I LEFT AND WENT TO MY TENT.
THE OFFICERS NEVER SAID A WORD.

In September 1973 while I was processing out of the Army as a Spec4, Parachute Rigger with 82nd Quartermaster Co., 82nd Abn. Division, Ft Bragg, NC, my roomie and I were walking down the sidewalk, a brownie in my left hand and my medical papers in my right, a leg 2nd Lt. came up and we saluted, with my left hand, realizing immediately what I had done. The Lt. stopped us in our tracks read us the riot act, not for the left-handed brownie salute, but for our covers. Parachute riggers wore red baseball caps with rigger wings on them, and wanted our names to write us up for unauthorized covers. About that time an Airborne Captain walked up and inquired as to the problem. The Lt. shared about our unauthorized caps and as the captain dismissed us, we could hear him reading the unknowing Lt. the riot act for not knowing the regulations, and his scuffed footwear. He would have had me dead to rights on the brownie salute, but he was so incensed on our headgear, he didn't even notice the salute.