What is your funniest salute story?

A buddy of mine was the battalion commander's driver and as gungho as you can get.When he was on leave I filled in driving the Lt. Col. I had forgotten to cover the placard when I drove the CSM. He got a big kick out of 2nd Lts that saluted our jeep. Their expressions took a turn when they saw all the stripes on the sleeve that was returning their salutes.

As our captain walked into our CP prior to formation, we saluted him. Poor guy must have had food poisoning as he didn’t return the salute, farted uncontrollably and booked it into the latrine. The 5 of us including the staff sgt on duty held our composure for as long as we could. We were in tears when artillery barrages started sounding off from the latrine.

This was in basic training, the scene was in the Mess Hall. The Mess SGT had a rookie assigned to KP. He told the recruit to go into the store room and fill all the sugar bowls with Sugar. So the recruit went and found a box of white crystals. He thought it was sugar. It turned out to be water softener crystals. The whole company came down with the GIs

In 1970 I joined the Air Force. We had 50 guys to a flight. Basic Training was at Lackland AFB in San Antonio, TX. We had a very large black top with at least 8-10 Drill Sergeants with their 50 men in different bleachers giving instruction or lessons of the day. I was getting a physical so I was late to that formation. So when I arrived I just slipped into the stands. There was another airman who came after me and walked right up to the drill Sgt. and reported with a salute that looked like he was trying to keep the sun out of his eyes. Definitely not a normal salute. Of course he was between the drill Sgt and the rest of us. The drill Sergeant just turned around with his back to us and the airman. So the airman side stepped around to face the drill Sergeant to reported again! The drill Sergeant through his hands in the air and turned and faced us again to which the airman once again side stepped all the while with his hand in this very sad salute. Now the drill Sergeant screamed ‘WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR BOY?, INDIANS? Once more the drill Sergeant turned away from the class and once again the airman side stepped with his salute ... mind you his thumb on the side of his head and the rest of his hand above both eyes!!! So the drill Sergeant sent him to the rest of the other drill Sergeants to report to them and he walked to each one with his hand still on his head and reported to every other drill Sergeant on the pad. We were about to die laughing but were disciplined for it. You just needed to be there to see it. That was almost 50 years ago and something I will never forget.

After my separation from active duty. In 1976 I had business on a small Army base near Washington DC. The only sticker on the front of my car was a blue & white Smithsonian Institution parking sticker in the center of the upper windshield. That earned me a nice salute as I was waved through the gate.

When in basic training at Lackland AFB, TX in 1958 I was sent to the Base Chapel one Sunday to play
piano for the church service. It was pouring rain so I wore my raincoat. When the service was over I retrieved my raincoat and proceeded to walk back to my barracks. A MSgt approached me with a snappy salute. When I didn't respond he was confused. Then with side vision I saw a gold bar on each shoulder. I had mistakenly picked the wrong raincoat at the chapel.

I was working with ARNG as a helicopter engine mechanic and I was checking for Turbine Engine air leaks while the engine was running and rotors blades turning on the ground. A supervisor with a bad attitude thought he knew it all, started doing what I was doing and looked inside the engine exhaust and got his hair on fire. I turned off fire by placing my hat on his head, he took hat off with a few sparks on hair and it reignited. Again I turned fire off told him to leave. Later I found out not only did he burned his hair on his head, but also his eye lashes, eye bra and 3/4 of his mustache

I was a 2LT, Army Reserve, for about a year. I had gone back to college to finish my degree. Walking back to my dormitory (facing east), some new friends were walking up to me (facing west, sundown) and as they greeted me, my friend Rob held up his right hand to shield his eyes from the sun. Instinctively, I returned his gesture with a salute.

When I was in Vietnam as a Lance Corporal I was roaming around Freedom Hill in Da Nang when I got myself in a salute fix.
I saw someone walking toward me with gray hair and assumed it may be an officer. When he got close I saw butter bars and figured I had better salute. But then I saw the little red squares on the bars of a WO. I panicked as to whether or not they are full-fledged officers, requiring a salute or not? I quickly threw up a salute as we passed each other. I got about three paces before he yelled out "Marine!". Oh crap, I realized I had given him a left handed salute!
I did an about-face. "Let's see that salute again Marine!” he said calmly. I saluted him correctly. "That's what I thought." he responded. Then he said "Carry on Marine." I was technically AWOL between getting discharged from the USS Repose hospital ship (from malaria) and returning to my company in the bush up near the DMZ. I didn't need to be answering any questions about 'where I was supposed to be'.
At that point, I di-di-mau'd right out of there! .

When I was in Vietnam as a Lance Corporal I was roaming around Freedom Hill in Da Nang when I got myself in a salute fix.
I saw someone walking toward me with gray hair and assumed it may be an officer. When he got close I saw butter bars and figured I had better salute. But then I saw the little red squares on the bars of a WO. I panicked as to whether or not they are full-fledged officers, requiring a salute or not? I quickly threw up a salute as we passed each other. I got about three paces before he yelled out "Marine!". Oh crap, I realized I had given him a left handed salute!
I did an about-face. "Let's see that salute again Marine!” he said calmly. I saluted him correctly. "That's what I thought." he responded. Then he said "Carry on Marine." I was technically AWOL between getting discharged from the USS Repose hospital ship (from malaria) and returning to my company in the bush up near the DMZ. I didn't need to be answering any questions about 'where I was supposed to be'.
At that point, I di-di-mau'd right out of there! .