What is your funniest salute story?

I was getting groceries at the commissary and had both hands full. I set my stuff down to put on my cover right before the threshold and picked up my groceries. I continued on for about 15 seconds when a Captain got out of his car and walked straight towards me. I was doomed to do one of two things. Either I set my stuff down or I take another path. Instead of either of those I panicked and quickly dropped my groceries in my LEFT hand and saluted. The captain saluted back and nonchalantly had a conversation with me. He did not realized I saluted with the wrong hand. On top of all of this my glass jars I just bought were now in pieces at my feet. I had to go back into the store to by more jars. Upon paying for my stuff the same Captain was also checking out. I overheard the conversation of him laughing saying "Some Dumb%$$ SrA just saluted me with his left hand and broke his groceries." He then proceeds to look back and have eye contact with me. This by far is the most awkward moment I have ever had in my military career. The sad thing is we stared at each other for 20 seconds saying nothing but also saying so much at the same time.

In Jan 1973 I was about six weeks into boot camp at the USCG training center, Cape May, NJ. President Truman died in St. Louis, MS. Since we all had short hair cuts and already knew how to march, they flew our company out to St. Louis, MS. on a C -130 to represent the Coast Guard in his funeral. All branches of the military were lined up in front of seven 3" cannons about 100 yards behind us as we were saluting for the ceremony. Apparently not many of the troops from any branch of service were familiar with the military funeral procedure. When the first volley went off from the seven cannons behind us several hats went flying(including mine). Fortunately that was not the picture that showed up in News Week magazine two weeks later. A week after we got back to Cape May president Johnson died. That funeral was in Washington. We were ready for it. Coasties learn quickly!
Respectfully:
Gerald A. Nichols DC (MST1)
USCG 11/26/72-03/31/77

I did my basic training at Ft. Jackson, SC. We were standing outside waiting to get into the mess hall as retreat started. We all came to attention and saluted. I realized that my hat was on crooked and reached up with my left hand to adjust it. Unbeknownst to me one of my drill sergeants was standing behind me and saw what I did. I had to stand in front of everyone and say to a Palm Tree, "I will not adjust my hat while retreat is playing for 100 times." How embarrassing!

A young Marines tried to avoid saluting an officer. The officer instructed him to salute him 100 consecutive times. This officer was known for this. A higher ranking officer saw this from his office and came out to assess the situation. He first corrected the young Marine and gave them both a period of instructions about saluting. He basically said it was sign of respect from both parties, so he instructed the officer to render a salute everytime the young Marine had to salute. The officer didn't want to salute so he cut that punishment short

Hi all, I was in basic training in Lackland Airforce base and I was walking somewhere and the 5 o'clock sound went off and I had to turn and salute the flag. At the same time a bus had to stop and it was full of new recruits. The bus stopped right in front of me and all of the guys in the bus were staring at me the whole time that I was saluting and taps was playing.

Walking from my car to the uniform shop, approaching a pilot leaving the shop, I smartly salute him. As he returned his salute, I quickly realized I left my cover in the car!

In late 68 I was attending the NCO Candidate Course in Ft Knox. At the time, we were required to salute passing cars that bore the blue base sticker denoting an officer. All the new LT's drove sports cars or muscle cars with stick shifts and they had been drilled just as hard as we had about saluting or returning salutes. The results were frequently hilarious as they over-revved the car while trying to return salutes from every passing enlisted man, even though it wasn't required while driving.

Sr Airman John Kidwell
I was in a tech school in the Air Force at Biloxi Mississippi in the late 70's. I was prior service (Navy) so I did not live with the recruit students and did not have to march to and from school to my barracks, so I rode a 10 speed bike. I was riding by the wing headquarters after class one day when a full bird Colonel, and a Lt Colonel come out the front door of the building. I was riding my bike, and was not required to salute under those circumstances, but I let go of the handle bars, turned toward the officers, snapped to attention, and produced my best parade ground salute. I didn't even smile. I regained my handle bars and didn't look back until I rounded the next corner. When I glanced back, Both the Colonel and the Lt Colonel were laughing, and the colonel had dropped his briefcase.

Best salute story ever.
There were to Boot Camp Officers that were known as Muff and Jeff. They would walk around wanting us enlisted personal to salute them like always, regardless where ever we were.
One day my buds and I were out ion the town. and we saw Muff and Jeff walking towards us so to avoid them we walked across the street. Well that was a mistake they called us over and gave us a big chewing out. They said the KNEW why we crossed the street and how disrespectful it is to avoid their superiors, and on and on they went.
Well the next day Our ship was leaving for Vietnam. The ship was the USS Ranger (air craft carrier) for those who did not know. Anyway there were hundreds of us crew members on the flight deck as the Carrier was going under the Golden Gate Bridge in San Fransisco. The wind was blowing so hard that just about everyone was leaning into the wind and the wind would keep you from falling. I'm talking about 15 degrees or more you could lean into it.
So my two friends and I saw Muff and Jeff leaning into the wind and they were just giggling a way like to school girls. Yep that's what we did we walked up in front of them and saluted, and naturally the three of us locked the wind. To bad cell phones were not around at that time. The expression on Muff and Jeffs faces when they both looked at each other as the were falling was priceless. I bet they were seeing their fall in slow motion. Needles to say None Skid on a flight deck dose not feel good at all.Their hands went out to stop falling on there faces, and their Knees buckled up to where their khakis ripped in the knees. JUST TO FUNNY.
Well of course they were none stop on chewing us out. Felt like for ever, but we were cracking up so hard. Just happened that the XO was walking by, and he also was having a blast on the Flight Deck. Muff and Jeff stopped the XO and started their BLAH BLAH BLAH. XO said he will take care of the situation. So XO pulled us to the side and once Muff and Jeff were out of sight the XO could not stop laughing. He said he saw what we did to those two CLOWNS as he called them. The XO said he just had to walk by so he could here what the two CLOWNS were crying about.
Well after that day hardly none of us and others were bothered by Muff and Jeff and about a month later they were never seen again. We think the XO transferred them to another ship or shore duty. Acording to other officers they were just a pain in the ass to whom ever was around them. One of these situations where you just have to be there.

Didn't happen to me, but I was with this fellow as we were returning to our barracks from the PX in Germany. This fellow had a lot of things in his hands which he finally got moved to his left hand to send a salute to a Captain. After he saluted, the Captain called back, "Not with a cigar in your mouth soldier." The one thing he forgot.