What is your funniest salute story?

I was a direct commission. One day, a civilian. Next day a Cpt. Four day’s later I appeared at the Quartermaster School in my new uniform. Walking up the sidewalk, briefcase in right hand, I encountered a short guy in a nice uniform. I nodded and said “good morning.” He stopped me, looked at me and put his finger on his shoulder. Do you know what this is? Some kind of bird. “That’s Sir. Do you know what it means?” No, sir. “ it means I’m a Col. do you know what Cpts do when you they meet a Col?” No, sir. “They salute.” Yes, sir, briefcase in right hand. Obviously, one salutes with left hand. “Yes, sir.” Salute. Col shakes with look of disgust. “Forget it.”

Fifteen minutes later as class is called- “Any direct commissions in this group?” A few hands go up. “Apparently, one of you met the school Commandant this morning. It didn’t go well. Better come and talk to me.

We never saluted officers in Vietnam. However, when our LT told us we were going to Phu Bai for 2 weeks he said the following: we are suppose to salute officers there but you better not salute me or else. The first time I saw the LT: I said good morning Sir and I saluted him. He chased me all over the perimeter and cursing and telling me what he was going to do me.

I joined the Navy about 10 years later than most, but I as a Seabee this wasn't all that unusual. One Time (when I was a PO3) I was temporarily stationed at an Army insulation, it was late at night and I was returning to the barracks to get some sleep. I notice an Army Lt.Co. headed my way so I begin to pop my salute when suddenly he (as if in shock) beats me by popping the fastest salute I'd ever scene. What made it funny is he said "Sorry Sir!" as he saluted me! Of course I responded with "Carry On." and I continued towards the barracks.

I was on this oiler out of Pearl and this one weekend, we had an inspection then a "Steel Beach Picnic". I was always a squared away sailor, with an inspection uniform (in plastic), dixie cup, gloves, shoes, ribbons - even socks! I was so proud. Well, after getting my chow of burgers and fries, my 'inspection neckerchief' blew in the wind into my food, getting ketchup all over it and promptly painted my 'inspection white shirt'. I was pissed! And wouldn't you know right then and there, the Captain walked up to me and saw my newly red-stained 'inspection uniform' and calmly told me, "Son, you look like s--t. Go and get changed."

I was at Bootcamp and had to get some work done on my eyes. So on my way back to my compartment. All I could see were pants. Well Chief Petty Offier on up to Admiral where khaki pants with their NSU uniforms. And I ended up calling an officer a chief. And forgot to slute

Afghanistan, 2009. I was an IS2 wearing Army ACUs with Navy insignia. Now from a distance my E-5 crow looks vaguely similar to a Colonel's bird, I admit. I expect confused stares from soldiers and airmen. That's a given. But from a Navy SEAL Senior Chief and a company of Marines?!?!

One day I'm walking back to my camp from Dragon DFAC. It was a good day, sun was shining, base was quiet. Two Army officers pass by me the opposite direction and I promptly deliver a salute. Close behind was a SEAL Senior Chief (E-8 for those who don't know) in their distinctive desert camo with trident. I guess he wasn't paying attention to me but just saw the two officers in front of him salute as I passed. At any rate, this Navy E-8 (did I mention he was a SEAL?) salutes me, this lowly Navy E-5 who doesn't leap tall buildings in single bounds. I promptly respond "Good morning, Senior Chief!" His response...."Aw shit! Uh, Good morning..."

Then....same damn day!

I was walking down Disney drive when I was passed by an entire company of Marines walking single file the opposite direction. Eye contact and greetings were made all along. Until I got to the last 10 Marines. One of them saw my rank and quickly popped a salute. The next three in line followed suit, clearly not paying attention to me but to their buddy up front. They're walking too fast for me to correct them properly but I suddenly hear "AW SHIT! That guy was Navy!" This was followed by the requisite ribbing from the rest of the witnesses.

I was walking from the flight line in Yuma back to the barracks in my flight suit and piss-cutter. In the Helo community enlisted aircrew wear the octigan camouflage cover and the officers wear the piss cover (garrison cover). In the KC-130 community Everyone just wears the piss-cutter. Another Marine was approaching and as he got closer I could see he was looking me over and I could see he was a senior enlisted but not enough detail let me know who was approaching. About the same time as I could discern who was coming towards me he throws up a very nice and crisp solute and at that same time we are close enough so he can see there are no bars on my cover and the patch on my flight suit reads CPL. I can now see that the individual I am facing is the base SgtMaj. There are two things to keep in mind here. Most SgtMaj in the Marines will have spent some time on the drill field and two SgtMaj are never wrong.......... therefore when a SgtMaj salutes a CPL on a summer afternoon in the the Az desert life can rapidly deteriorate. But I lived to tell the story and today it's a fond memory of my time in Yuma.

My first field exercise, in my first permanent duty assignment, Reforger 1982, I was a PVT. I had been taught that you did NOT salute in the field, but we were instructed to render the greeting of the day, show respect in that manner.
So, here I am walking through the company AO, and here comes the BN CO, and the BN SGM. I'm still a bit green, so I'm like oh shit, but remember what I was told, and continue to walk towards them, I'm and said good morning sir!..... I got about two steps past the Colonel, and I hear the him bark Private!! Don't you know you are supposed to salute officers! !! So now I'm thinking oh shit.
I turned and faced him looked him straight in the eye, and told him "Sir! I was instructed that in a field environment, NOT to salute officers because it would identify officers to the enemy snipers!" I certainly meant no disrespect and I did give you the greeting of the day and showed respect verbally, and that I would be more then Happy render a Salute! and rendered a Salute and held it until returned, the Colonel did chew me out a little, it seems he didn't think it was likely that snipers would be in the area. The Sergeant Major never said a word, but he did nod as he and the Colonel turned to walk away......flash forward a couple days later, the Platoon Sergeant, SFC Kenny walked up to me and Barked "Private Dinsmore You are out of uniform! Get your shit together or I'm gonna give you an article 15!" I didn't have clue what was wrong, and after a while I just went back to to him and admitted it to him. He barked " You are wearing the wrong fucking rank Private First Class! " ........ I had to borrow some rank because I didn't have PFC rank pins. I wasn't expecting to be promoted for another month or two. I've always wondered if the first incident, caused the second incident??

Get a bunch of your buddies and stand about 10 meters apart outside the MCX and wait for officers to come out. About every third step someone is saluting. LCPL games.

Being saluted by Soldiers at Ft Huachuca who were nervous when they saw Marines