Posted on May 18, 2014
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First let me say I am biased in my opinion since I am a single soldier. The Army stacks the deck against single soldiers, in a variety of ways. There are standards that single soldiers are forced to obey that married soldiers are not. Purely just because of their marriage.

Housing is my personal biggest area of concern being a single soldier. I am a 27 yr old college graduate. I get the same "rights" in my living quarters that a single 17/18 yr old straight out of high-school would get. If that same soldier is married, they get considerably more freedom, pay, and budget control than I do.

I as a single soldier get no say in where I live. At my current duty station the BAH for my rank and dependent status (Single, E-4) would be $1,068. So I essentially pay $1,068 dollars a month to live in the barracks. The barracks I live in have two separate bedrooms, with a common kitchen and bathroom area. Since there are two soldiers in each little barracks apartment, we collectively pay $2,136 a month for this set up. That is FAR more then what a similar apartment style would cost in the surrounding communities. If single soldiers were allowed to have BAH and live where they choose we could potentially save several hundred dollars a month by controlling our living expenses. That's not including the approximately $300 a month we are forced to pay for the DFACs.

There is also the issue of furniture in the barracks. Again we have no say, we get whatever the Army already has in the room. Personally I would love to have an actual nice mattress, instead of these cheap plastic blue ones.

Barracks inspections. I can't stand barracks inspections. The inspections are completely up to the person doing them and what they "think" the standard should be. One inspection your could be fine, the next one your getting lectured about how to make a bed. Last summer I had to write a 2 page paper for an LT about personal standards in the barracks. All because my bed didn't have hospital corners. (That morning when I get up I tossed my blanket off to the right of me, where it was just sorta crunched up against the wall running the length of my bed.) If I want to know what I am allowed to have and not have in my room, I have to read three different policy letters to find out. Division could allow something, Brigade could say no, and then Battalion have nothing about it at all. I get that lower commands are allowed to restrict privileges as they see fit. I'm just saying it's cumbersome to have to read three different levels policy to find out what is what.

It annoys me that I have to have periodic inspections(currently every morning before PT for my company) while married soldiers receive no inspections just because they are married. I get that they have a family, I just don't see why that should stop a squad leader from making a planned, announced, and visual walk-through of the house of the married soldier. Keeping the same standard of living as a single soldier should be part of the military life.

Meal Deductions. I don't think the DFACs are worth the $300 a month I have to pay. I hate having to "play" the "I am a Meal Card Holder" card to get lunch sometimes during work. It's usually followed by a married soldier saying "I'm working thru lunch, you don't see me bitching about wanting to leave for food". True. However when we miss our lunch it's gone. The money we paid is gone rather we ate that meal or not. Married people if they bring their lunch it'll still be there later. If they eat out, then well that's just money they didn't spend that day. They can use it tomorrow to get twice as much for lunch or eat somewhere more expensive depending on their budget.

We get no say in what sounds good for dinner. It's whatever the DFAC has. Sometimes that means either fried or grilled chicken. If they run out of one thing, it'll be whatever they have left. It's not right. It leaves married people with control over their diet and single soldiers with whatever the Army needed to clean out of the fridge.

The above is just Big Army things, the discrimination continues all the way down to the company level. At my company single soldiers who live in the barracks are not allowed to park in the lot in front of the company. Now our barracks is approximately 3/4 mile down the road. Our motor pool is another 3/4 mile the other direction. I find it silly that an entire parking lot is reserved for married people. Sure single soldiers can drive to work, but we have to park in the barracks across the street. Which is not the barracks we live in. Married people can't park in that same lot if the one in front of company is full? To a point I can understand the reasoning behind this, but single soldiers have to leave and run here and there just like our married counter-parts. Why should they get special parking treatment? I don't see anyone stopping married people from using the barracks washers and dryers to avoid buying their own/going to coin laundry mats. Why are married people allowed to dip their hands in our honey and slap ours away from theirs?

Like I said from the start I'm biased. I look over the fence and see greener grass. Perhaps this is all just one single soldier bitching and complaining.

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Update FEB 2019: Since I originally posted this message, I have gotten married. My view on the subject has not changed. I want to respond to some of the overarching themes in everyone responses.

“Quit bitching/whining/complaining.” I feel there is a difference between logically laying out issues and grievances and just bitching about them. The number of leaders who contributions on this post/topic amounted to “quit saying words” is disheartening.

“Get married/Army will issue you a wife.” Saying to get married just to move out of the barracks is a failure of leadership. Those of you (in my opinion) with that mentally should reconsider what you do/did and what your job is/was. As a former Infantry NCO I have dealt with the countless issues that arise when a soldier quickly marries someone for the wrong reason (example: get out of the barracks). The domestic issues, spouse calling in to the Staff Duty, soldier isn’t training because of counseling/FAP/court/Divorce related nonsense, greatly diminishes readiness which the last I checked the Army still considers to be pretty important.

“I had more money/I wish I was back in the barracks/ but but bills! etc.” Bull. I wish I could challenge anyone who says that to actually prove it. As stated, I am married now. I have more money, flexibility, and financial freedom then I did as a single E-4. Now some of that is because I’m a higher rank. Part of it is because I use BAH as intended to cover housing/bills, my BAS for food, and having the control over how much I spend on those two items is very important. Also, my spouse works. I have come to realize that is less than common for married soldiers in the Army. However, I would argue that getting married and not having both spouses working is a decision that you made going in to it. I’m not arguing/stating if it’s the right or wrong choice. It’s what you decided worked for ya’ll. To me it’s the equivalent of a private going out and buying that 23% interest Mustang then complaining about how much money it costs and how he used to have it so much better without that car payment. If you choose (by getting married/having kids) to feed/house/care for additional people (spouse/kids) and yet do nothing to increase your income than yeah…you’ll have less money. That is a very poor argument for what the original post was about.

a. Hopefully ^above^ I’ve made my point clear and concise seems a little muddy to me, I guess we shall see in future comments.

“Move off post.” That’s not an option. Well I guess it is, however single soldiers still have to maintain the barracks room they get assigned, they still wouldn’t get the BAH entitlement, and they would have to still pay the DFAC out of their BAS. Do I need to continue on the ignorance of that statement? Sure, there’s a packet you can submit and ask to receive those allowances, I’ve only ever seen get accepted once and that was when my BDE changed from Light to Armored, only for E-5s, and it was suggested only if they were on orders and would be PCS’ing soon anyhow. They wanted non-PCS’ing E-5s still in the barracks. I don’t recall if I stated it in my original post but that unofficial additional duty of being an NCO at the barracks is crap. “You’re an NCO at the barracks keep everyone in line down there after work and on weekends”, thought that’s what CQ was for. I’ll also comment on the “single people off post would party to much/be late to formation/traffic at the gates/ get in trouble in town more” line of nonsense. It’s ignorant. Along with the “paying dues” comments.

Veterans- I appreciate you are still active in the boarder military community, and recognize that your time in the service paved the way for what we did/do/have accomplished today. However, pointing out how things were worse yesterday compared today and to “suck it up” is lazy. There is no reason we can’t keep pointing out things today to make tomorrow even better. I’m sure there is crap I can’t even fathom that ya’ll dealt with back in the 60s, 80s, and what have you that were fixed because of people continuing to bring the issue up.

Lastly, I’ve enjoyed reading the varied amount of responses everyone has on the topic. If mine come off as aggressive or across the line it was not my intention. When I posted the original stuff above 4+ almost 5 years ago I never expected it to get attention and still receive emails notifications years later. I’m fairly sure I’ve read 90% of the comments because Rally Point sends me an email every time someone comments. No I did not add that picture at the top, it’s the website. Sorry if you clicked on a Rally Point ad somewhere that linked to this post only to see it’s from 2014. I don’t control those. It’s the website. Yes I’m sure there are a few grammar and spelling errors. If you point it out at the beginning of a comment, I’m more likely to see it and correct the issue. Cheers to several more years of being told why I’m wrong.
Edited >1 y ago
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Responses: 488
SSG Michael Doolittle
Well, at least you do not have unplanned layoff's or downsizing, or corporate buy outs and force reductions in staff.... The military is much different today than when I was separated in 1970 after 8 years.... But no matter how or why we do things, just know that we all owe a great deal to those who do serve.... Thanks
SGT Dan Theman
Dude....two words
WELL STATED.
CPT Marvin Wolf
There is an exception to that generalization. On overseas tours, especially short tours, if you bring your wife and almost nobody else has a wife in-country, you are not appreciated if you miss any of the officers' happy hours, or if you and your wife don't go to Sunday Morning chapel because you happen not to be a Christian. Then you are expected to work more and get a lot of weekend duty.
LTC Deputy G3/5/7 And Chops
You are a college graduate. Perhaps you should have chosen the Officer Route instead of enlisted. However, if you are planning to make the Army a career, your enlisted time will serve you well. Military life is mostly a young man's life. Meaning 17-18yr old straight out of high school. As such, discipline and structure are emphasized during your early years. I was a not so young enlisted once, at 21yrs old PFC in the Marines, my squad leader was younger than me, and I was stuck living in barracks. Not fair? Life is not fair either, this is the military life, it is not for everyone. Many head-games are played, perhaps you understand it now, but having young soldiers living in barracks does serve a purpose, it is the place where you get molded as a responsible young adult, by providing you a semi-control environment in which to learn, make mistakes, and learn from them. Should you make similar types of mistakes out in civilian life, the consequences might be much higher. Again, you are older and a college graduate, the implication here is that you are already molded and do not need this experience. Unfortunately, that is a decision you made, look at the bright side, once you make SGT you can drop your Green to Gold or a direct commission request or OCS. My advice, embrace the experience, learn and perhaps one day when you are a General you can make changes to policies
Cpl Vic Burk
Things must have really changed since I was in the Corps in the 70's. I would have died for a room vs. the open squad bays we had. You didn't get a room until you were in E-6 on many bases. We had barracks inspections almost every day. Not clean enough for the inspector? Everyone stayed to clean up that night...including those living off base. Duty? Married or not, everyone got duty and if you were assigned, you stood it unless you paid someone else to stand it for you. (That was a good extra source of income for me! I was in demand many weekends and holidays, especially Christmas time.)

Yeah, the food wasn't the greatest all the time but it was OK. It kept you fed. Those on COMRATS (Commuted rations as we called it back in the day) only got around $60.00 per month (I know, things were cheaper back then) but that wasn't enough to keep you fed by any means. COMRATS were no bargan, the mess hall was even if you felt like you were going to barf sometimes when you left!

You were right about pulling someone from the barracks for duty if whoever wasn't there didn't show up, but believe me, they paid for it unless they could PROVE one hell of a good reason (like they went to the emergency room) with office hours (Article 15) for being AWOL. On top of the fine they also had to stand your next duty to make up for it. I remember having to pull the barracks duty NCO's duty once. The Sergeant got fined but they made him a deal, he could either stand duty every weekend, both Saturday and Sunday for a month or the company commander was going to send the charges to the battalion level where he could lose a stripe plus the fine. As you might guess, it wasn't his first time but it was the first time with this company commander. He stood the weekend duties and never missed a duty again!

Parking? I agree that is messed up and a bunch of bullcrap.

I can't really say I felt discriminated against being single so things must have really changed over the decades. Just remember though, no matter how bad you think have it, it could be worse!
1SG Steven Malkowski
WOW!!!!
Sgt Tom Davis
I don't think the military discriminates against single members. When I enlisted, I was already engaged, the recruiter explained all the benefits I would receive as a married Marine. He even pulled out an LES and showed me what he got for BAS, VHA and housing. There was no discrimination, if you chose not to be married, you didn't qualify for the benefits. I knew that if I wasn't married, I would either have to live in the barracks provided or pay for housing on my own dime. If someone entered into a contract without understanding the contract, or without consideration of the terms, that isn't discrimination, that is a lack of attention to detail and situational awareness.

Being a 27 year old college graduate doesn't give you any special privilege over someone else starting out in the same spot, you and that 18 year old kid out of high school are both "boots".
Sgt Anti-tank Missileman
It’s either, the military is bullshit or you should suck it up and get out. There’s very little in between. Very few in leadership roles are willing to make a change to increase retention, therefore, nothing changes. In my opinion, you’re right. I remember when our base closed 2 of the 3 chow halls (dfacs) and expected junior marines (usually with no vehicles) to walk a miles and a half to chow and back for every meal, but still pay the $300 A month for the “luxury.” Constantly getting told,” it’s your fault that these random marines broke something at 2am in another building.” If it ended at the end of your first enlistment Id be less retaliatory towards the topic (I understand paying your dues) but I’ve seen 7 year Sgts still dealing with the same crap and living in the barracks. Either way the snarky E-8s are right. Just get out because it’s the way it is and there’s nothing to be done to change it. I loved my job, but damn the living conditions and always havIng work banging on your door wear on you. If you’re still in, props to you and I wish u the best, protect your brothers and your juniors from the shit you delt with as best you can.
CW3 Bill Wynne
I must agree, I was a single 1SG, 101st Airborne, 801st Maint Bn, and we had just decommissioned the Women's Army Auxiliary Corps, and I lived in the barracks. I should have been, at least to Senior NCO Quarters, but I was honored to receive 27 Female Soldiers; some of the first Regular Army Females and back then their husbands were not treated as dependents, as were the female spouses. BOSS is or was a Good Idea. At the age of 33, I surrendered to a Lady, and from then on lived off post, til retirement.
SSgt Patricia Boyer/Rossi
Everything you say is true and was back in my military years 1978-98. They really need to look at each military members age and maturity level. And you absolutely right that military people get married sooner than they should to get out of the barracks.

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