1SG Dennis Hicks

1SG Dennis Hicks

Dates of Service: Jan 1978 - Apr 2013
81% Complete
79 Contacts
Influence Score: 535,987
255 out of 861,629 Veterans
About Discussions


  • SPC Aug 79
  • SGT Oct 81
  • SSG Apr 83
  • SFC Feb 88
  • SGT Dec 92
  • SSG Apr 96
  • SFC Jan 00
  • 1SG May 02

Recent Activity  -


Professional ASSHOLE with a long history of SARCASM, Motto "Wouldst thou consider plumbing thine own cavities yonder" I will describe you as I see you. If you are easily offended then I recommend not engaging me. I will not act like the SRNCO that you want but as I have really become after 35 "PLUS" years of dealing with Shit birds. Former tesserarius centuriae :)

Military Experiences

Apr 2013 - Oct 2020
Retired 1SG
Finally off the books, no more calls to come back and enjoy the fun, Officially an old broken down bastid with a very bad attitude and little patience for the purposely thick. Free to enjoy the results of decades of bodily abuse, mental health decline and old age in peace. Now to become even more deranged, disrespectful and combative as it is now the new normal. :)
Feb 2010 - Apr 2013
First Sergeant
Won an all expense paid vacation to the land (A-Stan) where goat sex is legal and encouraged as a National pastime/sport, a place where area beautification projects are another form of extorting money from Uncle Sam. Got to see what happens when you mix the Benny Hill style with terrorist in a small Hillux bongo truck as it gets lit up by an Apache, the dogs and crows ate well that day. To this day, Porta Potties remind me of the Afghan National odor, crap left in the hot sun to ferment.
Jan 2009 - Feb 2010
Acting CSM
Served as Acting CSM when the current one had to leave the service due to a Family Issue. Did a great deal of OJT without Support from my BDE/CACOM CSM's. Watched as selected CSM's were told to take over only to leave before doing so. Did the best I could with the Support of my peers and fellow NCO's and managed to do some good. Truly understood that it was a good thing I am not a SGM/CSM as I lack the social graces, the political acumen or the life force left to do battle at the upper levels. In addition I like to put my hands in my pockets, walk on grass and HATE reflective belts. I also like to get my hands dirty on details, drive LMTV's, HUMMERS and curse. That and while down at the 1 week long CSM Course at Leavenworth I seem to have grossed out CSM's/COL's and their wives daily :)
Jan 2007 - Nov 2008
First Sergeant
Was hand selected from a humongous manpower pool of three for a trip to the land of perverts (IRAQ) where they bugger young boys and have Man love Monday at the shower chu, saw a place that could use underarm deodorant and time management badly where I learned that nobody can tell the truth nor do they feel the need to. While I was in country I sat there and wondered why I was picked up as a CSM(D) and yet I was told there were no positions, reminded me of Musical chairs with baseball bats, I withdrew from the SMA.


(2 years, 1 month)
Apr 2015 - Apr 2017
Can not be described nor the horrible activities that will occur. HAZMAT has been notified, it has been declared a supper-fund clean up site until 2060 and the horror exists, Stay away from Vegetarian MRE's they will be the death of your Gastrointestinal system.
Started in Apr 2013
FOB Livingroom
Responsible for household sarcasm and trouble, "Honey do" list holder 1st class, drinker of all the coffee, beer, Rum &whiskey.Point of blame for all household issues or police raids ,Stirrer of all shit online and at home and genuine problem causer, legend in my own mind and source of all irritation "BEHOLD" Buckle up buttercup, Getting old sucks.

Military Credentials

Professional Development Schools

Jun 1980

Basic Non-Commisioned Officer Course (BNCOC/CA)

May 1979 - Jun 1979

Primary Non-Commissione Officer Course (PNCOC/CA)

Individual & Special Skill Schools

Jun 1995 - Jul 1995

Civil Affairs Reclass Course

Jan 1995 - Jul 1995

Carpentry and Massonary Specialist

Mar 1981 - Apr 1981

Jun 1978


Mar 2020

Basic through Advanced Trolling with a Bachelors in Shit stirring

Apr 2013

Advanced Ashholery Theory and Application

Foreign Language Skills


Sarcasm Verbal and Sign Langua (5/4)

Security Clearance
None / Expired

Personal Information

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