Posted on Apr 27, 2015
CH (MAJ) William Beaver
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Sometimes you may just find a love that lasts while in the military. Lucky you! What makes it either hard... or not so hard, to find LASTING love while in the military? What are the challenges of military marriages that can become a big strain? What have YOU found that works that you can share with others?
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Responses: 16
SSG Roger Ayscue
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Chaplain Beaver,

I did. I found my wife in the military. It has been 16 years and we are still going strong. We have survived deployment, retirement, family illness and the death of a child.
You ask what works for us, let me share just a few tips.
* First, It is NOT always about YOU, it IS about you both.
* Share the bad dreams, when she says she wants to help, LET HER IN
* NEVER do anything you would not want your spouse to know, If it would hurt you, it would hurt them too.
* Grass is seldom greener, if your grass is not as green as you would like, spend your time fixing your own lawn, not looking for a new one.
* Work you kids into your lives as a vital part, not as strap hangers. Kids know if they annoy you or if you really care.
* Tell the truth, ALWAYS. Truth can be worked on but a lie will always collapse.
* Before you think about how good looking she USED TO BE, look in the mirror.

Finally, Seek guidance and parity from God above. pray together and seek wisdom from above. Treat your spouse the same way you dream of being treated yourself.
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MAJ Contracting Officer
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My first wife left after 17 years of marriage and a 20 year relationship because she "didn't want to be married to the military anymore. This announcement came the week after 911. I met the woman who completes my life while we served in the same Air Force Reserve unit. She was a flyer - a medtech. We knew each other and she saw me in a funk at the December drill in 2001. Just walked up and said something like, "you're not yourself this weekend. If you want to talk let me know." She didn't know I'd just filed for divorce the day before. Long story short - we were married 7 months later. She actually deployed to OEF before I did and I gave her a ring when she got off the plane. Wouldn't change a thing.
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SFC Warrior In Transition
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Met my wife in Tong Du Chon, Korea. She was another American Soldier stationed there and 17 years and three kids later we are still as happy as ever. She eventualy got out, but she has been my rock and best friend for the entire 17 years we have been together. 15 of them married!
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SSG Roger Ayscue
SSG Roger Ayscue
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Also met my wife in Tong Du Chon, also another service member. Small world ain't it
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