Tim Hawkins - Atheist Summer Camp

I thought it was good reminds me of when I was forced to to a Y camp for 2 weeks with my brothers.. yes it was a more Christian setting.. I s’pose I didn’t get the concept of a Y camp. I was always going on unsanctioned bivouacs with my Scout buds where we drank “jungle juice” we brewed.. various fruit juices, yeast(bread crusts will work) Sugar.. kick up with ginger ale for extra carbonation. We had some military songs(blood on the risers the best)... well I brought the book of songs to the Y camp with me..
I also brought some legal pads to make copies.. found a few others we volunteered for K.P. Where we appropriated what was needed for our jungle juice.. fortunately we had not appropriated our supply before a shakedown ... we had some kids from the “hood”, the powers that be thought we needed a shakedown again.. we had one
Before we got on the buses.. my gear still made it.. So we’re at midweek campfire, got jungle juice, got songs copied and passsed out to guys who had same likes We had the same Army surplus campaign tent ... kept our tent Military neat..
our counselor came in and yanked our hospital corners and left.. we made them up even tighter.. His rack got “short-sheeted” big time !
We also loosed the ring nuts and lowered the legs at the foot of his camping bed.. anyway at the fire we passed our brew, had a good kick!.. I raised my hand to do a song.. my buds were now strategically planted around the fire.. I got song leader to blow on that little tuner.. and I got the song going.. we got 4 verses in and we got stopped.. this song is not appropriate for children ! So they got the wheels on the bus going for the little ones.. y-a-w-n !... Us bigger guys started slowly drifting away and went back to our tent.. still had jungle juice left.. we started singing blood on the risers as we route stepped back to our tents.. I gathered the music sheets and hid in my gear bag..
On Thursday we had a shakedown.. where’s the booze(aka jungle juice).. Well they didn’t find it, it was in us.. what we had not disposed of in our urine.. We took a break from the song for a few days.. let them calm down.. We were still fired up.. Friday on the way to chow we in our group sang blood on the risers as we route stepped the half mile in.. a messenger came and got our counselor.. he Was gone 15 minutes.. came back and said we would cease and desist or be sent home and money not refunded , they would pay our greyhound tickets home.. We stayed quiet until lunch was over.. we got out of there and formed up .. we started with bridge over river Kwai.. and changed to blood on the risers..
when we got back to our tent, I set about making sure all my gear was packed and ready, as did my new buds.. We waited for the word .. it never came.. I thought we’d be home by supper Saturday .. hmm what changed their minds.. ? Us older guys had a choice of 2 trips..
all us singers chose the truck trip..
I had a load of G.I. Songs that were not exactly G rated ..in my book.
The main guy was driving and we were in the back singing “Blood on the risers” while stuck in traffic.. We finally got past the clusterflop at the light and were on the last 1/4 mile out of town.. when we saw the red and blue lights of the police car.. we couldn’t of been speeding all the traffic was going turtle pace..
so we pulled over to a gravel lot of a closed shop.. some body complained about our singing.. was not appropriate for a bunch of kids in the back of a truck marked with
a YMCA on the door to be singing..
And the town council will surely let the YMCA know.. When we stopped for gas somebody yanked the magnetic signs and threw them in the back under a bench.. We resumed our caterwallering after we cleared town limits of any town we journeyed through.. went into U.P. Mi. ... did camping, more singing, got juices and fruit and sugar and other items to make jungle juice..
we all got kinda ripped at our fire ..
had a fun time.. I woulda liked to been gone on The ROTC bivouac..
So those of us who wanted to be
Elsewhere.. my new buds had little brothers at the camp too.. on the other side.. When it was over and our families came to get us.. I got a letter to NOT RETURN to the camp or any other Y camp.. Yeah, I got a reprieve !.. I told my parents since they forced me to go on that clusterflop, that I was going to the joint ROTC Bivuoac at Grayling or Selfridge.. A whole 4 weeks.. last 2 of July and 1st 2 of August..
What about your brothers? No, this is for ROTC .. I see enough of them and they see enough of me .. You guys aren’t paying. Anything.. well your taxes.. So.. I dug out my ROTC
Gear and up north I went.. I’d been to Selfridge my Freshman year.. We’d be learning S.A.R. Stuff up north.. We were on a far side of Camp Grayling .. We still had to be careful.. At least we could sing our not so G rated songs out where we were.. and s’body would make a fuss.. “not appropriate for Cadets to be singing.. another was Hinky
Dinky Parlez vous, (Madamosielle from Ameritieres)any old timers remember it?... oh well.. The songs were fun..