Posted on Mar 8, 2015
How do you handle narcissistic superiors who promote themselves at the expense of their subordinates?
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Examples I’ve witnessed or personally experienced with my Airmen:
- Extra hours on top of a 12 to 16-hr workday spent turning over snow on the sidewalk near footpaths so a DV’s eyes aren’t offended by “dirty, muddy” snow.
- Completely re-arranging a shop’s set-up so that important people (i.e. this individual’s superiors) are presented with the sexy equipment/work areas right at the door even if it it’s a PITA to actually work around.
- Additional work on the grounds that the contracted lawn care/landscape folks did not complete to his/her satisfaction… on the weekend.
- Pulling weekend duty to chase high-scores on production metrics regardless of actual mission requirements/demand.
These are just a few. My problem is this seems to be happening more and more as I discuss it with my peers over an adult beverage. None of these are ‘unlawful’ orders but they hurt the lives of our people and their families. Insubordination aside, bitching about it to your subordinates only exacerbates the problem for numerous reasons. In addition, it also undermines the importance of orders/direction that actually needs to be carried out for the mission. In many cases it seems like our hands are tied to combat this and we just have to force feed our folks the feces sandwich and wait for the toxic leader to get his/her head-pat by a star and eventually promoted out of that position. How do you actually take care of your people in these situations?
- Extra hours on top of a 12 to 16-hr workday spent turning over snow on the sidewalk near footpaths so a DV’s eyes aren’t offended by “dirty, muddy” snow.
- Completely re-arranging a shop’s set-up so that important people (i.e. this individual’s superiors) are presented with the sexy equipment/work areas right at the door even if it it’s a PITA to actually work around.
- Additional work on the grounds that the contracted lawn care/landscape folks did not complete to his/her satisfaction… on the weekend.
- Pulling weekend duty to chase high-scores on production metrics regardless of actual mission requirements/demand.
These are just a few. My problem is this seems to be happening more and more as I discuss it with my peers over an adult beverage. None of these are ‘unlawful’ orders but they hurt the lives of our people and their families. Insubordination aside, bitching about it to your subordinates only exacerbates the problem for numerous reasons. In addition, it also undermines the importance of orders/direction that actually needs to be carried out for the mission. In many cases it seems like our hands are tied to combat this and we just have to force feed our folks the feces sandwich and wait for the toxic leader to get his/her head-pat by a star and eventually promoted out of that position. How do you actually take care of your people in these situations?
Posted in these groups: 
Toxic Leadership
Toxic Leadership
Edited 9 y ago
Posted 9 y ago
Responses: 8
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Document, document, document. Especially when these "extra" things have direct negative impact on the operational mission. Might be worth an IG complaint. There are ways to submit anonymously. open door policy with the individual or thier next level CC.
There is also the ultimate maxim. If you don't like your leadership...wait 2 years, it will change.
There is also the ultimate maxim. If you don't like your leadership...wait 2 years, it will change.
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I agree with TSgt Joshua Copeland but beautiful thing, I have now been able to work for those that are not Toxic. By choice.
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Pretty simple actually.
1. First, you can only control the world you are charged with (what you are responsible for). You can't control, influence, or change your superiors. I have had this issue more than once, and at the end of the day... you are the only losing sleep. Focus on what you can control.
2. Second, you learn things from every leader... the good and the not so good (or bad)... Put this in your kit bag, as a behavior you will never exhibit.
1. First, you can only control the world you are charged with (what you are responsible for). You can't control, influence, or change your superiors. I have had this issue more than once, and at the end of the day... you are the only losing sleep. Focus on what you can control.
2. Second, you learn things from every leader... the good and the not so good (or bad)... Put this in your kit bag, as a behavior you will never exhibit.
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LTC (Join to see)
COL Charles Williams Sir, I was not saying that is our only job. You mention sphere of influence, and it is like a Venn diagram. Subordinates, peers, and superiors should all have their own circle in each individuals diagram. Where each falls is where your influenced is focused.
I agree with you on the premise of the question, I was just doing what I will always continue to do, challenge the conventional thought paradigm for the better understanding of those around us.
I agree with you on the premise of the question, I was just doing what I will always continue to do, challenge the conventional thought paradigm for the better understanding of those around us.
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COL Charles Williams
Well LTC (Join to see) That is what we need, challenging the conventional ways. Things always are changing (the only constant). This worked well for me, but different things work for each of us. Don't get me wrong, I have challenged many a superior, when I though it mattered; and had my butt chewed by up to a 4 star general... But, I also learned to pick my fights wisely. For, me, my measure of how I was doing was always what my units thought, not what my bosses thought. I always focused down, and the rest took care of itself. Tread lightly, challenging superiors, as many don't like it. Also the time and place matter. Thanks for your service and be safe!!!
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COL Charles Williams
LTC (Join to see) One last point... also remember the lens we look thru is that of a military leader... which is vastly different on the outside... Most business, or corporations don't have a leader development system that comes close to ours... Many places, like education, is the polar of opposite of a leader development program. It has been interesting to say the least.
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LTC (Join to see)
COL Charles Williams I will take that advice, especially since I believe that something in the education field is somewhere in my post military future.
I like to think that there are small groups of people in any organization that can be agents of change they just need the right individual as a catalyst to release them from the sedentary state that they currently abide in.
I like to think that there are small groups of people in any organization that can be agents of change they just need the right individual as a catalyst to release them from the sedentary state that they currently abide in.
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