Posted on Jan 16, 2015
7 “In-Uniform Rules” Service Members Wish Their Spouses Knew. Any to add?
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With how busy so many Service Members are due to their military duties, it’s sometimes tough to ensure that our spouses are fully up to speed on rules and regulations that may be relevant to them, or to the time we spend together on the installation. Below, we list 7 of the most common “in-uniform rules” spouses should know.
Which ones would you change, and why? What else would you add to this list?
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1. PDA is typically prohibited, except for certain special situations.
Military regulations take public displays of affection (PDA) more seriously than many spouses realize, due to high standards for professionalism. Special situations like a return from a deployment MIGHT be acceptable circumstances for a quick “welcome home” kiss, depending on your chain of command.
2. My right hand is empty for a reason!
While in uniform, Service Members are typically expected to keep their right hand empty while in conditions that would require a salute, which is done with the right hand only. This may seem obvious to SMs, but many spouses do not know this!
3. I can’t talk on my cell phone while walking.
Talking on your cell phone while walking in uniform on base is one of the easiest ways to get jacked up as of late. It’s like putting a target on your chest. We’ve heard countless stories of Service Members witnessing a Senior NCO sprinting across the street to make this correction! Epic.
4. Why I say “no” when you offer me a piece of gum.
Many military units prohibit chewing gum while in uniform, especially while stateside. We’ve heard reports that this may vary depending on the military branch or command policy of the SM, including the degree to which it’s enforced. But just in case, it’s important to know this!
5. I can’t use an umbrella when it’s raining. Seriously.
Uniformed SMs typically cannot utilize an umbrella when it’s raining outside. They have wet weather gear for that, even though that gear still allows them to get soaked most of the time. We’ve heard reports that some female SMs may be allowed to use an umbrella under certain circumstances, and we also can’t confirm how strictly a SM’s chain of command enforces this. But beware that SMs using umbrellas is as squared away as a football bat.
6. Wearing my uniform items could get me jacked up, or worse.
This is a sensitive topic for some SMs, but there have been countless situations where a spouse wears the SM’s uniform items in inappropriate ways and is perceived as casting the military profession in a negative light. Enforcement of this policy also depends on the SM’s chain of command or installation policy, but PLEASE be thoughtful and considerate if you ever decide to put on your SM’s uniform items while outside of the home environment.
7. I still need to salute and greet while we’re together.
This aspect of the military profession occasionally irritates spouses, but when a SM is uniformed and on the installation he is still required to greet and salute IAW regulations, even if the two of you are enjoying a nice private walk together. This issue occasionally catches “new” military spouses off guard – meaning those who are new to the military culture, perhaps due to recent marriage or their SM recently joining the military.
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Which of these would you change, and why? What else would you add to this list?
Which ones would you change, and why? What else would you add to this list?
//
1. PDA is typically prohibited, except for certain special situations.
Military regulations take public displays of affection (PDA) more seriously than many spouses realize, due to high standards for professionalism. Special situations like a return from a deployment MIGHT be acceptable circumstances for a quick “welcome home” kiss, depending on your chain of command.
2. My right hand is empty for a reason!
While in uniform, Service Members are typically expected to keep their right hand empty while in conditions that would require a salute, which is done with the right hand only. This may seem obvious to SMs, but many spouses do not know this!
3. I can’t talk on my cell phone while walking.
Talking on your cell phone while walking in uniform on base is one of the easiest ways to get jacked up as of late. It’s like putting a target on your chest. We’ve heard countless stories of Service Members witnessing a Senior NCO sprinting across the street to make this correction! Epic.
4. Why I say “no” when you offer me a piece of gum.
Many military units prohibit chewing gum while in uniform, especially while stateside. We’ve heard reports that this may vary depending on the military branch or command policy of the SM, including the degree to which it’s enforced. But just in case, it’s important to know this!
5. I can’t use an umbrella when it’s raining. Seriously.
Uniformed SMs typically cannot utilize an umbrella when it’s raining outside. They have wet weather gear for that, even though that gear still allows them to get soaked most of the time. We’ve heard reports that some female SMs may be allowed to use an umbrella under certain circumstances, and we also can’t confirm how strictly a SM’s chain of command enforces this. But beware that SMs using umbrellas is as squared away as a football bat.
6. Wearing my uniform items could get me jacked up, or worse.
This is a sensitive topic for some SMs, but there have been countless situations where a spouse wears the SM’s uniform items in inappropriate ways and is perceived as casting the military profession in a negative light. Enforcement of this policy also depends on the SM’s chain of command or installation policy, but PLEASE be thoughtful and considerate if you ever decide to put on your SM’s uniform items while outside of the home environment.
7. I still need to salute and greet while we’re together.
This aspect of the military profession occasionally irritates spouses, but when a SM is uniformed and on the installation he is still required to greet and salute IAW regulations, even if the two of you are enjoying a nice private walk together. This issue occasionally catches “new” military spouses off guard – meaning those who are new to the military culture, perhaps due to recent marriage or their SM recently joining the military.
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Which of these would you change, and why? What else would you add to this list?
Rules
Spouses
Regulation
Posted 11 y ago
Responses: 187
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As far as umbrellas go, enlisted soldiers and female officers are authorized to use them, but male officers are barred. This originates in the early days of World War II, British Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain often carried an umbrella around, and his attempts to negotiate with Hitler, gave him the reputation of being a traitor. This led to the US Army instituting a regulation banning male officers from carrying umbrellas. This regulation has since disappeared, but it is still practiced. As far as utility uniforms, I'm sure someone using an umbrella would be the laughing stock
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I think the PDA policy is a little overbearing. I get the whole he doesn't' need to be having a make out session every day in the food court, but ya know, my hands are messed up so sometimes it hurt when I'd try to hold onto his elbow as we walked into the PX, especially in the cold. I finally said screw them, and held his hand. Sometimes it was even his RIGHT hand... it would be a loose hold so if I didn't notice the officer he was saluting or hear his warning, it was nothing for him to slip his hand out of mine to salute. But not a lot of people even noticed he was holding my hand, and the few who did didn't care. If I was really tired (especially when I was pregnant), no one cared if he wrapped an arm around my shoulders and let me rest my head on his chest. If I got a little excited some days and started jumping all over him, I'd get a tap on the shoulder and be reminded to settle down a bit, he's in uniform... but they didn't care that I still kept ahold of one of his hands and stood there and shook with excitement. He got yelled at more often for hands in his pockets than he did for PDA since most Senior Leadership weren't ball busters about it around us.
And while yes, he is required to salute and greet while in uniform, even when he's with me, that doesn't mean that 1900 as we're heading to our car to get to a meeting, that you need to pull him aside for a 15 minute conversation about stuff for next week's mission when you have FOUR duty days to address it... you didn't feel the need to keep him late at release, you didn't feel the need to CALL him before you walked past us as you were headed into the restaurant, so obviously, it wasn't THAT important that it couldn't wait until TOMORROW'S WORK CALL!
And while yes, he is required to salute and greet while in uniform, even when he's with me, that doesn't mean that 1900 as we're heading to our car to get to a meeting, that you need to pull him aside for a 15 minute conversation about stuff for next week's mission when you have FOUR duty days to address it... you didn't feel the need to keep him late at release, you didn't feel the need to CALL him before you walked past us as you were headed into the restaurant, so obviously, it wasn't THAT important that it couldn't wait until TOMORROW'S WORK CALL!
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I agree with all of the seven points. One of my biggest pet peeves is when spouses where parts of the uniform. I think they need to add "excessive use of the F bomb". Makes us look like unintelligent baboons when every other word is the F bomb.
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I would slightly modify the first one on PDAs, but only in the homecoming situation. That is certainly a time for PDAs and are much needed by the SM and their families, especially when the SM has been deployed to hostile environments and has seen some ugliness. The only other rule I would like to see addressed with an eye to at least modifying some, is the cell phone rule, particularly when the SM is in CONUS. I am a staunch believer in military bearing and professionalism, but I also believe that the military in general should change and adapt to technology and the times as long as it's in keeping with good order and discipline. Having said this, what I mean is that as long as the SM can use their phone discreetly and as long as they can still maintain awareness of the potential for needing to salute or greet a superior, then there should be no problem.
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There is no reason for forcing a SM to get soaking wet just because they are in uniform. It further makes no sense that they should have to don wet weather gear to go from their car to a building only to have to take it off when they get inside.
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Personally I would not change anything and if we are good service members and a good communicating spouse than there will be no confusion. It is not "their" responsibility to keep up with rules and regulations. They are civilians. I know that is obvious but they are not paid to keep up with rules and regulations. We can't expect a civilian spouse to understand if we are too lazy or condescending to educate them. I cringe when I see the way some service members talk to their spouses because they do not understand military protocol. When the spouse goes to basic training then they can be responsible for the knowledge.
Perhaps the problem is not the spouse's knowledge of protocol but the problem is really the lack of respect by the service member for the sacrifices that the spouses make to provide a home by giving up careers and dreams to follow the service member to each assignment and the service member's assumption that they will learn it by osmosis.
Perhaps the problem is not the spouse's knowledge of protocol but the problem is really the lack of respect by the service member for the sacrifices that the spouses make to provide a home by giving up careers and dreams to follow the service member to each assignment and the service member's assumption that they will learn it by osmosis.
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