Anyone have any funny cadet stories to share?

When I was with 10th Mountain, we would go down to West Point to to train the Cadidiots. We would play OPFOR after training them on basic Infantry tactics. Generally we would sit on caches and defend them when they would come around. We also played Gorilla type warfare too. One day a buddy and I were set out on LPOP to watch an intersection. While sitting there, we had a squad size group approach our position within a few feet. There was no OC with them which was a bit strange but we continued to observe. They sat down right in front of us and broke out their maps and protractors. They began to shift their ruck sacks off their shoulders and get a bit comfortable. You could see the RTO trying to make comms with no luck. So at one point we decided we had the upper hand and we were going to attack. We safety killed them and stole their maps and freqs before "Z"ing out their radios. Pretty dick move now that I'm thinking about it, and specially knowing after the fact they were lost. They kept asking us for help, we just asked for their West Point rank to wear on our boonies and moved back into the woods to link up with our squad. Later that evening after our squad leader came back from the leaders meeting he came to us and began asking questions about the cadets that we encountered. Apparently they have been lost for a day and a half wondering the woods. Also apparently another squad pretty much did the same thing to them but took their MRE's. LMAO! Good times. Not sure if that constitutes as a funny cadet stories but it was fun.

One of the cadre was asking how to properly pronounce my last name when I was an MSI. I said it is, "Dell." Then the "linger" part sounds like "singer". The SFC said, "Oh Dell like the computer." I said yeah. He said, "and linger like a fart?" So he proceeded to call me "Computer Fart Boy."

Not all Cadet stories are about them doing stupid things but sometimes about getting them to squirm under pressure.

The Summer of ‘91 as a SSG (11-Bravo type) I went to West Point to help teach their Light Infantry Week (Battle Drills, Patrol Base Ops, Recon and Ambushes); these Cadets just finished their 1st year at the Academy and spend the week in the field. The thing about West Point is there’s a lot of Brass there, Colonels are a Dime a Dozen and VIP Visits are almost non-stop.

During our 3rd week of training Cadets our OIC drops this nugget on us; the Head Coach of the Army Football Team is joining us for 24 hours, not as an Observer but to be integrated into a squad and he has NO Military experience. Nobody volunteered to take the Head Coach until I remembered that one of the Cadets in my Squad was not only on his team but slotted to be his starting Quarterback and this Cadet was just assigned the M-60 That morning.

Every M-60 Gunner needs an Assistant Gunner to carry most the ammo and the Tripod, so I assigned the Head Coach as the AG, making him subordinate to his Sophomore QB. First order of business was introduce our M-60 Gunner to his new AG, with the instructions to the AG follow all commands from his Gunner and that the two are never further apart more than Arms Reach for the next 24 hours. Then I put them through an hour of Crew Drills!

The Coach hung tough for the entire 24 hours. Watching the Cadet “coaching” his Head Coach was quite interesting. In the end the Head Coach had nothing but high praise our team of instructors!

Back in the mid-90s, we had 4 cadets attached to my unit for the summer. During a unit exercise at Fort Bliss, one of the cadets was tasked to drive the U-Haul truck for one of the SF teams. Needless to say, he misjudged the height of the truck and hit the top part of a "height bar" at a drive through. It was pretty funny and the guys teased the cadet throughout the rest of the exercise.

I realize with GPS land NAV With a compass is old school but it’s sort of the point . Heaven forbid we ever lose the GPS satellites. I’m old school I’ll stick with a compass and map and rely on GPS in the car. I also spent many years teaching map reading so hopefully my lessons sunk in.

I got a detail during the summer on Ft. Bragg. I was cadre for ROTC cadets. RTO for a SF bird and a SF SM, I was from 82nd. We did 6 cycles. We had a blast stealing their weapons at night after road marching their ass off! The excuses from the cadet commanders were classic
!

I had a fellow cadet at "camp" that kept dying every time was a leader. It was never his fault, but how the cards were dealt. We had grenade go off by us and a SAW open up on us. Well we noticed this after the first two times and from then on instead of just listing the next two in succession we listed everyone down to the last person to be in charge if we all died. It was our way of poking fun of him. It really was odd how every time he did die as a leader, but we always got the mission accomplished.

Here is my personal story. I was an MSI cadet in 1985 and was part of a group selected by the MSIVs for a special training event. We flew in UH-1s to a camp in northern Wisconsin that our college ran. There we went through a variety of training events. One of these was to cross a 1-rope bridge. I got on and the next thing I knew, I was laying on the ground. I had fallen off and knocked myself out when I hit the ground. I came around when one of the other MSI cadets said, "Jon, your fly is open." I guess that was the stimulus I needed as I reached down to check as I was lying on the ground.

Happened to a buddy of mine at basic camp at Ft. Knox. One of his platoon mates from some school up north was having a hard time dealing with the Kentucky heat that summer, and it was fine in the barracks, but field time in a makeshift FOB of sorts known affectionately as Tent City to cadets, found the young Sophomore in quite a slump. I suppose the whole resiliency thing wasn't really a part of his training in General Studies at Slippery Knock college in nowhere USA. Anyways, Tent City featured port a johns, and our young hero decided he had to go one day during afternoon chow. He goes in in full kit, and five or so minutes pass. All of a sudden the door busts open and the guy runs out pants around ankles yelling "It's Hot". He's losing his shit taking off all his gear and in the chaos faceplants on the dirt. Of course the Drill Sergeants rush over to address the issue, but they see the whole thing and cannot keep it together.

Had a cadet at NTC as I was in the OPFOR, in the late 80's. Every one had sleeping bags on top of cots. We put peanut butter on the end of his sleeping bag. Later in the evening a coyote came and was licking the end. I never saw some go from horizontal position to the vertical position on top of the BMP as fast as him, and better yet, he was still inside his bag! Great entertainment for years!