Posted on Oct 23, 2014
Do you believe that your PTS (PTSD) symptoms can be found in your family members? It is called secondary PTS.
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Not contagious in the literal sense, but rather secondary PTS. They have been doing a much better job teaching us to identify the signs and symptoms of PTS in the military, but in my opinion they do not explain the effect that PTS has on our loved ones.
Symptom example: Startle response.
You are doing everything in your power to keep noise to a minimum so you don't find yourself clinging to the ceiling. Suddenly, the kids accidentally drop something and BOOM! That demon rises up and takes control. Even though you calm down and apologize, you plant that seed in those around you. Before long, even if you manage not to react, the kids may. They flinch and panic because they expect your reaction. We have now conditioned others to feel what we feel.
So many arguments happen in the family because of the lack of understanding that our symptoms can effect our loved ones. Don't waste your time pointing fingers. YOU might be Rambo and think you can deal with it on your own. Your family may not have that same iron constitution. If you don't want to get help for yourself, get help for their sake. One Team One Fight applies to family even more than the branch you faithfully serve.
This is an example from my life before I got help from the VA. Please share your opinions for the benefit of the community. God bless. Uncle Mark
Symptom example: Startle response.
You are doing everything in your power to keep noise to a minimum so you don't find yourself clinging to the ceiling. Suddenly, the kids accidentally drop something and BOOM! That demon rises up and takes control. Even though you calm down and apologize, you plant that seed in those around you. Before long, even if you manage not to react, the kids may. They flinch and panic because they expect your reaction. We have now conditioned others to feel what we feel.
So many arguments happen in the family because of the lack of understanding that our symptoms can effect our loved ones. Don't waste your time pointing fingers. YOU might be Rambo and think you can deal with it on your own. Your family may not have that same iron constitution. If you don't want to get help for yourself, get help for their sake. One Team One Fight applies to family even more than the branch you faithfully serve.
This is an example from my life before I got help from the VA. Please share your opinions for the benefit of the community. God bless. Uncle Mark
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I agree with you even though I was one of those who was afraid to seek help.
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SFC Mark Merino
Perhaps you did, but it is never to start enjoying the life that you deserve, my friend. It is never too late to start enjoying life free from PTS/D
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Sorry for the late responses, I keep getting locked out from RllyPoint. We were having some delicate conversations last night and I don't want you to think that I just quit responding. It was a technical problem.
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PTSD is not something you can catch, like a cold or an STD. However, the affects that the individual that has it can certainly affect that individuals family, friends and work environment. Let's say that I have PTSD and I run into (literally) someone in the mall or commissary. Well, me touching them will not make them 'catch' it. The affects of PTSD on my family, meaning the symptoms that I have, certainly can have an adverse outcome on my family, in the same way that me being a Michigan Wolverine fan will make my children more likely to cheer for them on a Saturday.
But I get what you are saying...hell, I think that I just said the same thing. :-)
But I get what you are saying...hell, I think that I just said the same thing. :-)
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I have to agree with SPC(P) (Join to see). I wasn't aware that I had PTSD even though I never deployed. ( Say what you will but it hits LEOs, firefighters/ medics as well) It was attributed to my time working as a firefighter/EMT. Though many of us on crew had nightmares sometimes while on duty. It was not contagious as not all of us were diagnosed (about 3 of us on a 9 person shift have PTSD all from the same event). But even the members who weren't diagnosed have picked up on certain mannerisms that we currently have. Example: more pressured movements when we were dispatched to calls similar in nature (now I believe this is mainly from the rest of us moving quicker and them trying to keep up as they see we are more worried than most times), checking certain areas more than once (under beds, closets etc). I don't know thats my two cents, we spend so much time together that you can't help but become a little bit more like the persons you spend that time with.
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SFC Mark Merino
First responders are hit HARD SPC(P) (Join to see)! Rape survivors, survivors of natural disasters......it's certainly not just combat veterans. My poor little Hitomi watched her entire city go out to sea in the 2011 tsunami that hit Japan. They put down serious family roots in Japan. It's not uncommon to trace back family lines hundreds of years in the same towns. Not only was the death toll high, but their cemeteries were washed away. That cultural difference is often overlooked. It is a constant state of mourning.
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I don't think that it's contagious, but I do feel that it affects all parties involved. For example, the children in your scenario above. Families - whether it's a traditional family like the scenario or your military family, can certainly be affected by someone with PTSD. Those same individuals can also be there for support and can also be made to understand or at least be sympathetic. The biggest thing to take away, just as you stated, is that you can't be afraid to get help. Although the military has "hardened" us to a certain degree - it's also taught us to make planned and educated decisions for ourselves and others. Getting help for yourself and by those around you is key.
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This is interesting. I've never thought about the spreading of the startle response. For years, my friends have known to keep me clear of fireworks and other issues. When fireworks occur that nobody knew about, I've seen my response trigger a response in others.
I'm not so sure they feel what I feel, however. When something startles a friend of mine, I jump, but I am not sure that I feel what that friend feels. I'd have to say I think there's a difference there.
This is a very interesting topic, however. Thank you SFC Mark Merino!
I'm not so sure they feel what I feel, however. When something startles a friend of mine, I jump, but I am not sure that I feel what that friend feels. I'd have to say I think there's a difference there.
This is a very interesting topic, however. Thank you SFC Mark Merino!
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PV2 Abbott Shaull
Well our daughter due to brain trauma at birth would get startle to loud noise such as sirens. So going to parades or having emergency vehicles go by were sometimes difficult until she grew up some. My son who has Asperger's when he was 2 until 4 was deathly afraid of Garbage trucks, and Sirens and "Bang" from fireworks would set him off. Even today, he doesn't care for rallies in school, he tries to go, but most of the time, he sit them out. Yes I agree with you, we get so focus on us (me), that I have forgotten about my family too at times, but then again, when they let me be the fucking asshole, they claim that I have been. Well it hard to fix the problem.
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PV2 Violet Case
PV2 Abbott Shaull, I had experienced miscarriages since being in the military, rashes, heart attacks, panic and anxiety attacks, bone troube, no immune system and two daughters born with deformalities and learning troubles with special ed in school. They were also angry about their dad not being with us. So I was the asshole and at times would sit in a corner and cry when no one was around. But I got up and kept building on a small 3 bedroom house for my girls to live in. Hardly no money but kept struggling to do it all. My father pulled away from me when I got out of the military it was under honorable because I was so sick. But he didnt care about that I was still a failure. Finally I finished college and sold that house I built and tried to move to a city, oh no my PTSD was really bad then. My girls went their own ways in life right when my mom passed away. But now my girls even if the younger one got upset at Christmas later invited me to have dinner with just her and her boyfriend made my favorite dishes. I went she hugged me and said she was sorry for what she said at Christmas about me wrecking things. Well at times people want us to be a part of their events and we just cant do it. But they come around in time. Do not use name calling to one another and patiently wait and give space and respect. Learn top off to respect yourself and the accomplishments you have made. God has us each here for a purpose. Dont give up and try to smile even if it is hard to at times. Sometimes when we smile at the world it will smile back at us.
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SFC MERINO i never thought of it like that bro..............but your 110% right
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