Posted on Mar 19, 2016
MSG Anthony DiFondi
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I retired from the Army with 24 years of service back in late 2011. In the last 3 years, I have had dreams that I had to go back in the Military and I am now unable to keep up with the young troops and all the changes to the equipment and gear. The dreams are unsettling and very real to me. I know they are not about having an unsettled life that needs structure again, as I have an excellent job and great post-military career. I am finally settled in one spot and am very happy, so it can’t be an unhappy thing. Anyone else have these dreams?
Posted in these groups: Retirement logo RetirementSleep Sleeping
Edited >1 y ago
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LTC Program Manager
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Those are called "Nightmares"
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MSgt Danny Derden
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25 years of service for me and I have VIVID dreams at least 2 or 3 times a week. Sometimes of specific things that happened or regarding specific people, sometimes about nearing the end of my service and not being able to get my retirement processed (have that one a lot), sometimes about being on some assignment or mission and sometimes it goes well other times it goes to hell. Every now and then I dream about going back in at my current age, but usually in my dreams I am my younger self. Some are good, most are so-so, and some are bad and disturbing but they almost always wake me up and make it very difficult to get back to sleep.
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PO1 Chris Mallam
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I retired in 2015 and cannot go 1 week without a dream about suddenly being back in the Navy. Last night, I dreamt that I was back at my old command and we had a major weapons inspection, but I was a shitshow. I couldn't find all of my uniforms items. I struggled to find my boots and had to run around in my coveralls at the exchange with sneakers on trying to find them. Every dream is the similar. I end up back on the boat or in my old unit and can't accomplish a task, because I can't find something.
I make loads more money now, have all the free time I want, being self employed and enjoy my relaxed post military life. I have no desire to go back in and would refuse if they offered.
I think I just became so used to performing under pressure and problem solving, but now that I have no worries, my mind still craves it; That, or I really do subconsciously miss it.
I don't want to call it PTSD, because that doesn't seem fair to those that have actual combat experience. I'm not stressing over it and sometimes it's nice to run into old buddies in my dreams. I'm just tired of waking up and saying to myself, WTF was that all about?
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I retired from the Army Jan/2013 and also served in the Marines for ten years. I still have dreams most nights it’s part of our being. There are time I wake up and don’t go back to bed. It’s who we are.
SPC Felix Gutierrez
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I've never looked into it but now I see there's others having the same dreams. Very similar and still have them from time to time. Usually having to do with uniform or equipment not functioning. Being in at my current age of 40 and holding my old rank. Haha. Very real dreams. I do have a great career so definitely not about that. Interesting though.
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PO3 David Radich
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All the time
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SGM Awilda Velez-Rodriguez
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Yes, i retired 19 years ago and too often i dreamed im back on AD.
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SGT Maria McQuaig
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I served 6 years and got out back in 2004. I still have recurring dreams about being in the military, just of everyday life. I’m also living a very happy and fulfilling post military life and career, but when I have these dreams I awaken very sad or almost in tears from nostalgia. It’s disturbing. In my case, I did not want to leave the service but I had a life changing event happen and I was forced into the decision. I do truly believe I am better for having left the military so I’m very perplexed as to why it feels like I made a mistake when I wake from these dreams.
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SSG Duane Chee
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In the past four years or so, I have been dreaming about being back in the Army. Different places, different units, and always in the reception/integration phase. I'm always unorganized, and missing a part of my uniform. And to make it worse I have the lower enlisted Soldiers looking at me, wondering why I'm so ate up.
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MSG Anthony DiFondi
MSG Anthony DiFondi
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Yep. So familiar.
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SGT Stephanie Grant
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Constantly!
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SPC Diver
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Edited 5 y ago
I served for seven years back in the 1990s. I've been out for over twenty years now, but every few months I'll have some dream where it turns out I was discharged too early and so now I'm back in the army to serve out the last six months. As with all my dreams, it's all very fluid and disjointed. Usually, I've just arrived at a reception center, presumably at Ft. Hood, although it's not the one I actually went through there. From there, I'm sent back to my old unit and people I used to know are still there. I don't have any of my TA-50 and I'm frantic because I know that my return has all the leadership thinking "WTF are you doing back here? Jesus! You cant even ETS without fucking up!" My guts are in knots because I know "HE" will be there soon.

"He" was my squad leader for the last year I was in. He was a former drill sergeant and a sadist. When I was assigned to my last unit I had two years left to serve. A year later I was put in his squad. It wasn't long before he told me he had been watching me for the last year and didn't like the way I carried myself. He regarded me as a lost cause, useful only to serve as an example. He rode me for the entire year, every day. At one point, a couple of months later, after I incurred his wrath over something, he dismissed everybody else, took me aside came up to me and hissed right in my face "You know something? I believe I'm gonna have to crush you!"

It was not an idle threat. Over the next 8-9 months he made good on it.

He never actually shows up in the dreams. He remains always an impending doom that never materializes. I'll wake up gasping, sweating — I'm not sure if I've ever yelled out from it — and with the most tremendous relief, but I remain rattled for days afterward.
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MSG Anthony DiFondi
MSG Anthony DiFondi
5 y
I'm so sorry you went through that.
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SPC David Lammers
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yes I always have dreams about militiary and seam real except I got out 20 years ago i learned how 5o block them and my counselor said that's not good but i never complete my mission i can never relax and teak a break
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Tim Johns
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I did just six years, just part-time in the National Guard 30 years ago. Never deployed, was never mobilized, and never spent any active duty time outside of initial entry training. STILL dream about being in the Army at least once a month. Two thoughts in terms of reason: #1 Basic training and AIT were extremely formative times for me. I changed more, faster there (for the better) than at any other time in my life prior or since. #2 I have some regret about getting out; my mind is not going to let that go easily.
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Cpl Field Artillery Fire Control Man
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I dream I’m back in often , I’m at drill and I keep telling them I’m not supposed to be in anymore but they always say I signed back up or I have drills left . A lot of the dreams I have is we are spinning up to go back over seas or we are back in Iraq . Ive dreamed I went back to boot camp and couldn’t keep up . It’s all the time with these dreams .
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SSG Fernando Zamora
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I have them and I hate them. They usually involved being back in the barracks and I’m private snuffy who for some reason cannot keep up with his equipment. Other times I can’t find my unit formation for the division run. There’s been times I’m in the field and have a run away vehicle. All sorts of crazy stuff. Thing is I was a squared away soldier when I was in until I got sick and got a medical separation. Do the dreams ever end?
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SrA Steven Widdifield
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I just woke up from a nightmare!! I was in the Airforce for 6 years, went in during Kosovo and got out 3 years after the towers went down. In my dream I was in civilian clothes back in Germany I can’t find my uniforms and I miss my wife and kids so bad. I am 100 lbs overweight trying to fit in and all I wanna do is come home...
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SFC Dave Anthony
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I have similar dreams but I’m almost always in combat and jumping in. Always feeling inadequate due to my disabilities. Feeling like a phony, like I’ll be discovered because I can longer keep up. It takes a little bit after waking to tell myself I’m no longer in the military and then it’s comforting.
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SSG Cj Jones
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I can relate. I keep having convoluted dreams where I'm still in the military. I served 12 years and exited in 1996! So can't figure out why I keep having these dreams. Last night was the most recent, which drove me to Google the meaning of these dreams, which ultimately led me to this join this forum.
My dream last night involved being in a convoy enrout to field training, but this convoy was also a funeral procession enrout to our first stop - a funeral. Seated in the military hummer which I riding, were also a few of my siblings, similar to the way we road in the family funeral car when our mom died a few years ago. Except this time we were in a military vehicl. WTF!

This only one version of my dreams involving military experience. The majority of the time, they Seem to involve some form of travel enrout out to the field for training maneuvers.
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SCPO John P Ledesma
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I constantly have dreams about being back in the Navy. Most recently I was back aboard an aircraft carrier, meeting with my troops and checking out the spaces of our division. Then I realized I didn't have any uniforms with me other than the khakis I was wearing. I was planning to go buy new uniforms at the ships store but needed to get set up with a rack assignment first. These dreams always seem so real and clear. Always something about my uniforms as well. I've been retired for 25 years now after 22 yrs of service and I still have these dreams quite frequently.
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TSgt Tim Corcoran
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3 yrs 9 mos 22 days in the sandbox. Got out in 2012 after 11.5 yrs to the day. Have dreams of being back in Germany or Korea. Usually I can't find my hat or top(blouse hate that term). Sometimes, I'm back at like basic and I know I have my id card and they are trying to get me back in the service...but it's not really basic, it's like a conglomeration of all the places I've been. I have dreams of being bombarded by footballs, again at a place that's a conglomeration of all the places I've been. It's weird to wake up and look for a hat, or id card, or your blouse, or hit the deck and be crying because your brother or sister just died right next to you. My dreams are never of me back in Iraq or Afghanistan, always a green place and always overseas. It really hurts my soul to wake up to that. Any thoughts?
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