How should I proceed if I know about an inappropriate relationship between a single sailor and a married woman?

I already have him getting with a divorce lawyer on Monday. And the guy know she's married they've known each other for a long time

SSG (Join to see) - unfortunately, with no proof, even calling his commander directly might not result in much. Adultery is one of those hard to prove, harder to prosecute crimes under UCMJ. (Especially without a confession).

If it was my soldier, I’d just recommend he cut bait and rid himself of the two of them.

Bad advice, good intent. Every good NCO should know their Soldiers and address, to the fullest extent possible, anything that effects said Soldiers performance.

SFC Rick Walton - I respect your point, but I am curious as to how this affects the Soldier's performance, in your opinion.

[~203078:SSG William Rodriguez Anything that distracts a Soldier is a performance hindrance. It effects the ability to focus and concentrate on the task at hand. Obviously some tasks require far more focus but a distracted Soldier is never a good thing. And if you know about it, it's bothering your Soldier.

SPC Chris Ison regardless of the units they belong to one could argue that the soldiers discipline is being effected by the sailors actions

Good way to create a serious situation for yourself, it’s a no win situation. Everybody will blame, when this comes to light at your behest.

Unfortunately in today’s technological world any good lawyer will subpoena phone records and construct timelines. This costs A LOT of money. What is the end point, divorce, UCMJ, he is hurt. Needs to make decisions but consulting a lawyer would be first on to do list, again IMHO...

Divorce is never a pleasant thing to go through regardless of the side you are on at least I would not think so. Married 26 years myself by good fortune. I hate to hear about friends or family going through that, especially with children involved and plenty of animosity to go around.

SSG (Join to see) - Screenshots aren't proof. Anyone can drum up screenshots of anything they want.

Jody this and Jody that ——- !

It takes two and the wife of the soldier is just as guilty if not more, especially if she instigated or encouraged the relationship, saw it happen several times with the "Westpac Widows" that came out when their husbands were deployed.

Anything predj to good order and discpline is the CoC responsibilty.. even the appearance of misconduct is enough to warrant a no contact order. It is 100 percent our responsibility to take care of our soldiers. There is no such thing as

Personal buisness.. thats what leaders do. We make home visits, we talk to families and spouses.. We do whats in the best interest of our soldiers.. all the time not just when they have a uniform on, they are soldiers, sailors, marines, and airmen 24 hours a day. You are a leader 24 hours a day on and off duty. Take care of your soldiers.

I have had this problem numerous times and it should always be Command Team to Command Team discussion about the specifics of the problem and the perceived nature of the relationship (when 2 SM or their families are involved). Every situation is different, but it is up to the chain of command on how they want to approach the solution, ideally with all involved parties having the opportunity to speak their mind. At the end of the day as long as it is all laid out on the table and leaders are involved a good informed decision can be reached.

Here is a good overview I found since this is a fairly complicated matter.

Can your commander issue a no contact order for the PERCEPTION that you may be violating ARTICLE 134 for adultery, and check article 90 2,A, III, relationship to military duty, what is the meaning?

Article 90, UCMJ, is a wilful violation of a order.
If there is a suspicion of fraternization or adultery that may be affecting the command, good order and discipline, or be service discrediting then the command can take reasonable steps to prevent that. They can also investigate and take punitive action if there is evidence.

Here are the guidelines on the actual offense.
While adulterous conduct that is private and discreet in nature may not be service discrediting by this standard, under the circumstances, it may be determined to be conduct prejudicial to good order and discipline. Commanders should consider all relevant circumstances, including but not limited to the following factors, when determining whether adulterous acts are prejudicial to good order and discipline or are of a nature to bring discredit upon the armed forces:

(a) The accused=s marital status, military rank, grade, or position;

(b) The co-actor=s marital status, military rank, grade, and position, or relationship to the armed forces;

(c) The military status of the accused=s spouse or the spouse of co-actor, or their relationship to the armed forces;

(d) The impact, if any, of the adulterous relationship on the ability of the accused, the co-actor, or the spouse of either to perform their duties in support of the armed forces;

(e) The misuse, if any, of government time and resources to facilitate the commission of the conduct;

(f) Whether the conduct persisted despite counseling or orders to desist; the flagrancy of the conduct, such as whether any notoriety ensued; and whether the adulterous act was accompanied by other violations of the UCMJ;

(g) The negative impact of the conduct on the units or organizations of the accused, the co-actor or the spouse of either of them, such as a detrimental effect on unit or organization morale, teamwork, and efficiency;

(h) Whether the accused or co-actor was legally separated; and

(i) Whether the adulterous misconduct involves an ongoing or recent relationship or is remote in time.

Now, if you feel that the commander is wrong, then you can raise a complaint under Article 138, UCMJ, against the commander. Or you can take it to the IG.

"Generally orders are considered valid and lawful and are violated at the persons peril." That's a basic phrase found in all orders violations cases. An unlawful order would be one that unreasonably interferes with your personal life and that has no reasonable connection to military duty or service.

SGM(P) (Join to see) - Bingo, correct answer. Had the same thing happen many a times and this is the correct answer. The no-contact order is the correct avenue at that time to get to the point. Then instruct the member under your control to get counseling on the best course of action forward. If that is divorce, that is the answer. Family counseling might be another choice depending on if this is an issue of a bored spouse or something else.