I want to be Special Forces, but I don’t want to lose my family. Any advice?

First of all, my advise to you is to change your mindset. Special Operations relies heavily on folks who can master the basics and navigate well with limited or constrained resources. It is NOT a way out of dealing with “Regular Army” or its nonsenses. If you cannot shine in your current organization I can assure you that you will not do well in SOF. You mention how YOU want to be in a high speed unit as if the unit will improve you, I challenge you to dig deep and see the potential of what YOU bring to that unit. Be the kind of operator that the unit cant function without. What makes you the BBD? (Bigger Better Deal). Folks are always in search of an easy way out of good order and discipline, however, SOF members have the ability to master the basics and function well with limited resources and supervision. If you already doubt your ability to perform at that capacity because your family may suffer, then I can tell you when the difficulty starts, they will be your easy button and excuse to quit. You can have a family in SOF, that is a common misconception. Good luck, may the odds be in your favor.

You're misinformed about a lot of things. I would venture to guess you don't even know what it is that Special Forces actually does, other than "be high speed". The Army pays everyone's salary, and so everyone, regardless of the unit, deals with big army rules. If you just wanted to be in the unit, you're a 25U, you can be placed in an SF group as a support element. If you were there, you'd realize how ludicrous your question is. Do some research, otherwise you're going to spend two years training to be a green beret and then three more years doing it, just to leave because it's not what you thought it was.

Every unit has its own form of "nonsense". Special ops units just have a special kind of nonsense. But they also tend to have incredibly high OPTEMPO, so you will likely spend a great deal of time away from your wife and girls. And often you will not be able to discuss much, if anything about your work, or where you are going, with them. This can lead to an additional form of stress with thefamily. If your goal is to be home each night with your family, I would suggest you forget about SF.

I’ve been married for 17 years with 4 kids. Ive been in SF, 15 out of my 24 years of service. It definitely takes a strong girl to walk the road with you but I’ve been successful because of my family. Talk to your wife and make sure she’s on board for the long haul. If you believe her, you’d be surprised what youd be willing to do for them. Plus, I make $1000 more a month because I am SF. Imagine how much better you can do for them. Your family should be a reason why, not an excuse.

Son, I hate to break it to you now, but the Service in general is hard on marriages. Long hours and frequent absences can be hard on relationships whether you are SF or some 11B. The "joke" in the Navy is that two divorces are part of the qualification for Chief Petty Officer. If you are trying to find a job that offers stability and a home life, none of the Combat Arms, whether it be Armor to Green Berets, will offer a regular schedule.
Even when I was a National Guard Engineer Officer, I was gone 80 to 90 days a year.

One, if you don’t like big Army go home, or make yourself smarter to reality. All Soldiers deal with big Army, certainly those who get promoted. As for your Family and your marriage that is all in your court. Your spouse would need to be as independent as she will have to be should you remain Army, period. There are many Soldier in Big Army that have deployed as much as SF units. Your Families challenges are the same either way. Anyway your reasoning and question are ill informed. Conduct more research then make a decision. Thank you for your service.

There is always a price! SSG (Join to see) Soldiers must decide yes/no!

Unfortunately you have a hard decision to make. I suggest you discuss your desires with your spouse and get her perspective on how choosing to go SF will affect her. It will be a tough decision because she’ll have to be willing to possibly being separated from you for extended periods of time, sometimes without constant communication and with her dealing with not knowing your whereabouts. It’s a lot to ask of a person.

Going SF probably should have been done prior to starting a family because not only will your spouse to deal with long separations but your girls will have to as well. Children react different to long, unknown separations from their parents. You don’t want your children to get use to you not being around....

Tough decision and only you can make it, choose wisely but make sure it’s a decision you can live with...good luck to you.....

SOF desires people who bring something to the force, not those who just dont want to do "Big Army". You dont get drug through the dirt at Selection just to be able to put your hands in your pockets and not say "Sergeant" ever 5.3 seconds. It is about the mission, above all else. Defending the nation in complex situations.
Look up the SOF Truths and SOF Imperatives. If those fit your mindset, then go to Selection and let the Cadre decide if you have what it takes.
Many people try out only to find it is not all long hair and ranger panties. The work is hard, but it is what an operator desires.

Everyone knows that being the father to two girls is harder than SF. Why the extra punishment?