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The value of an Officer VS a NCO
A 2LT was walking home from work one day, when he noticed a little boy sitting on the sidewalk.
The little boy was playing with a pile of shit. Curious, the 2LT walked over to the little boy and asked him "Why are you playing with a pile of shit?" The little boy replied "I'm building an NCO". The 2LT, amused by this, ran back to the company to get his captain. Upon returning to the little boy, who was still playing with the pile of shit, the Captain asked "Son, what are you doing?" The little boy looked up at him and said " I'm building an NCO". The captain being equally amused insisted that they return and get the 1SG. When the three returned the little boy, still playing with his pile of shit, was asked by the 1SG "Son, what are you doing?" The little boy again replied "I'm building and NCO". "Why are you building an NCO?" asked the 1SG. The little boy paused and responded "Because I don't have enough shit to build an officer"
A 2LT was walking home from work one day, when he noticed a little boy sitting on the sidewalk.
The little boy was playing with a pile of shit. Curious, the 2LT walked over to the little boy and asked him "Why are you playing with a pile of shit?" The little boy replied "I'm building an NCO". The 2LT, amused by this, ran back to the company to get his captain. Upon returning to the little boy, who was still playing with the pile of shit, the Captain asked "Son, what are you doing?" The little boy looked up at him and said " I'm building an NCO". The captain being equally amused insisted that they return and get the 1SG. When the three returned the little boy, still playing with his pile of shit, was asked by the 1SG "Son, what are you doing?" The little boy again replied "I'm building and NCO". "Why are you building an NCO?" asked the 1SG. The little boy paused and responded "Because I don't have enough shit to build an officer"
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Humor
Humor
Posted >1 y ago
Responses: 112
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This was sent to me by a friend and obvious he is from Maine. This is the way he started his email,
"Evening from the woods of Maine where Men are men and sheep are petrified!!!!!"
Got to love it!
"Evening from the woods of Maine where Men are men and sheep are petrified!!!!!"
Got to love it!
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Police Retraining
Now let me see if I have this right.
There's no guidance or discipline in the home. The family situation is so unstable, 'Junior' doesn't even know where or to whom to send a Father's Day card. Junior gets dumped into the education system where he is socially promoted because the overwhelmed school district can't deal with the undisciplined whelp. Junior's major formative influences are 'gangsta' rap videos and a corresponding peer group of gangsta wannabes.
At age 18, Junior is turned loose on society carrying a bad attitude, a broken compass and little respect for authority. Junior gets himself in big trouble with the law and meets dire consequences. Then, the situation diagnosis is that the police need more training and understanding?
Pardon me for asking, but do you really believe this bullshit
Now let me see if I have this right.
There's no guidance or discipline in the home. The family situation is so unstable, 'Junior' doesn't even know where or to whom to send a Father's Day card. Junior gets dumped into the education system where he is socially promoted because the overwhelmed school district can't deal with the undisciplined whelp. Junior's major formative influences are 'gangsta' rap videos and a corresponding peer group of gangsta wannabes.
At age 18, Junior is turned loose on society carrying a bad attitude, a broken compass and little respect for authority. Junior gets himself in big trouble with the law and meets dire consequences. Then, the situation diagnosis is that the police need more training and understanding?
Pardon me for asking, but do you really believe this bullshit
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Nerd joke inbound:
What is the first thing to go through a mosquito's mind as it's about to be splattered against a windshield?
Its proboscis.
(yuk yuk yuk)
What is the first thing to go through a mosquito's mind as it's about to be splattered against a windshield?
Its proboscis.
(yuk yuk yuk)
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A young Indian boy goes to his father and tells him he has a question that's he's been thinking about. The father tells his to ask him. So the boy asked his father, how do Indians get their names? Oh, that is easy question to answer. When the baby is born, the first thing the mother sees becomes the baby's name. Like your sister Spotted Fawn or like your brother, Soaring Eagle. The boy then says thank you father for answering my question. Then the father looked at his son and asked him, why do you ask such silly question, Two Dogs Fucking?
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I can see it now. The new politically correct GI Joe/Jane that talk. Joes goes to the NCO club (in uniform) and sees GI Jane talking to Bi-sexual Barbie. Everything is fine until GI Parsons comes in with his Bible and all hell breaks loose. Jane and Barbie tell GI Parsons that you respect our beliefs and bake us a cake. An activist judge holds up their lawsuit while down the road a Jihadist bakes a cake with a severed head on it. What bakery would you go to?
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Four guys are playing golf on a Sunday morning when on the 7th tee they hear church bells ringing in the distance...
One of the guys looks in that direction and says, "I feel a little guilty now. I should have gone to church!"
One of the others says "I couldn't have gone to church today any way.... the wife is sick!"
One of the guys looks in that direction and says, "I feel a little guilty now. I should have gone to church!"
One of the others says "I couldn't have gone to church today any way.... the wife is sick!"
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Does anyone know why Canadians do it doggy style?
It's so they won't miss any hockey games..
It's so they won't miss any hockey games..
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Water in the carburetor
WIFE: "There is trouble with the car. It has water in the carburetor."
HUSBAND: "Water in the carburetor? That's ridiculous "
WIFE: "I tell you the car has water in the carburetor."
HUSBAND: "You don't even know what a carburetor is. I'll check it out.
Where's the car?
WIFE: "In the river"
WIFE: "There is trouble with the car. It has water in the carburetor."
HUSBAND: "Water in the carburetor? That's ridiculous "
WIFE: "I tell you the car has water in the carburetor."
HUSBAND: "You don't even know what a carburetor is. I'll check it out.
Where's the car?
WIFE: "In the river"
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The day after his wife disappeared in a kayaking accident, a Twillingate, NFLD man answered his door to find two grim-faced RCMP officers.
"We're sorry Mr. Flynn, but we have some information about your wife," said one of the officers.
"Tell me! Did you find her?!" Cedric Flynn asked.
The troopers looked at each other. One said, "We have some bad news, some good news, and some really great news. Which would you like to hear first?"
Fearing the worst, Mr. Flynn said, "Give me the bad news first."
The RCMP officer said, "I'm sorry to tell you, sir, but this morning we found your wife's body in the bay."
"Lord have mercy!" exclaimed Flynn. Swallowing hard, he asked, "What could possibly be the good news?"
The officer continued, "When we pulled her up, she had 12 of the best looking Atlantic Lobsters that you have ever seen clinging to her. Haven't seen lobsters like that since the 1960's, and we feel you are entitled to a share in the catch."
Stunned, Mr. Flynn demanded, "If that's the good news, then what's the great news?"
The officer replied, "We're gonna pull her up again tomorrow."
"We're sorry Mr. Flynn, but we have some information about your wife," said one of the officers.
"Tell me! Did you find her?!" Cedric Flynn asked.
The troopers looked at each other. One said, "We have some bad news, some good news, and some really great news. Which would you like to hear first?"
Fearing the worst, Mr. Flynn said, "Give me the bad news first."
The RCMP officer said, "I'm sorry to tell you, sir, but this morning we found your wife's body in the bay."
"Lord have mercy!" exclaimed Flynn. Swallowing hard, he asked, "What could possibly be the good news?"
The officer continued, "When we pulled her up, she had 12 of the best looking Atlantic Lobsters that you have ever seen clinging to her. Haven't seen lobsters like that since the 1960's, and we feel you are entitled to a share in the catch."
Stunned, Mr. Flynn demanded, "If that's the good news, then what's the great news?"
The officer replied, "We're gonna pull her up again tomorrow."
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