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Shave and a haircut
A Navy Chief and an Admiral were sitting in the barbershop. They were both just getting finished with their shaves, when the barbers reached for some after-shave to slap on their faces.
The admiral shouted, "Hey, don't put that stuff on me! My wife will think I've been in a whorehouse!"
The chief turned to his barber and said, "Go ahead and put it on. My wife doesn't know what the inside of a whorehouse smells like."
A Navy Chief and an Admiral were sitting in the barbershop. They were both just getting finished with their shaves, when the barbers reached for some after-shave to slap on their faces.
The admiral shouted, "Hey, don't put that stuff on me! My wife will think I've been in a whorehouse!"
The chief turned to his barber and said, "Go ahead and put it on. My wife doesn't know what the inside of a whorehouse smells like."
Navy
Humor
Posted >1 y ago
Responses: 5
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Just remember, Gentleman.... It's all about the ladies...... When you are at a loss for words, just say Umhem, Umhem.
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Laugh Out Loud! I have heard that before, but still made me snort my coffee!
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"Two battleships assigned to the training squadron had been at sea on maneuvers in heavy weather for several days. I was serving on the lead battleship and was on watch on the bridge as night fell. The visibility was poor with patchy fog, so the captain remained on the bridge keeping an eye on all activities.
“Shortly after dark, the lookout on the wing of the bridge reported, ‘Light, bearing on starboard bow.’
“Is it steady or moving astern?’ the captain called out.
“Lookout replied, ‘Steady, captain,’ which meant we were on a dangerous collision course with that ship.
“The captain then called to the signalman, ‘Signal that ship: We are on a collision course, advise you change course 20 degrees.’
“Back came the signal, ‘Advisable for you to change course 20 degrees.’
“The captain said, ‘Send, I’m a captain, change course 20 degrees.’
“ ‘I’m a seaman second class.’ came the reply. ‘You had better change course 20 degrees.’
“By that time, the captain was furious. He spat out, ‘Send, I’m a battleship. Change course 20 degrees.’
“Back came the flashing light, ‘I’m a lighthouse.’
“We changed course.”
“Shortly after dark, the lookout on the wing of the bridge reported, ‘Light, bearing on starboard bow.’
“Is it steady or moving astern?’ the captain called out.
“Lookout replied, ‘Steady, captain,’ which meant we were on a dangerous collision course with that ship.
“The captain then called to the signalman, ‘Signal that ship: We are on a collision course, advise you change course 20 degrees.’
“Back came the signal, ‘Advisable for you to change course 20 degrees.’
“The captain said, ‘Send, I’m a captain, change course 20 degrees.’
“ ‘I’m a seaman second class.’ came the reply. ‘You had better change course 20 degrees.’
“By that time, the captain was furious. He spat out, ‘Send, I’m a battleship. Change course 20 degrees.’
“Back came the flashing light, ‘I’m a lighthouse.’
“We changed course.”
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