Posted on Jun 26, 2024
What can my friend and his family do to ensure that they get to keep his fsther's belongings if he enters into a nursing home?
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What my Friend has sent me ""it's just been a shit day. I have an aunt who can't respect nothing, she's unhinged. I literally can barely stay awake and she wants me to drive dangerous roads to go see my father in the VA, when I cannot trust myself enough to drive let alone stay awake for hours waiting on some bitch social worker to resolve a situation that's so bad it'll affect me, as well as Dad. Dad has valuables that will be seized if he enters into a nursing home unless I figure out some way to put him in without losing the house. They also take the car as there's a loan active still. $3-4k owed on the pile of shit. I'm just mad at Dad rn cuz he didn't think about shit when we had time to spare to prepare for the inevitable. The will isn't even updated. Dad's falling further and further into senility and doesn't care. "he was in the VA hospital for 6 months. He had Clebsiela Pneumonia some new strain that's barely been looked into, multiple drug resistant strain, UTI, trouble with concentration, difficulty in walking" This is Regards to his Father. I asked for Permission before I posted this here. His Father was in medical service corps at Fort Dietrich, 1978-1987 according to his Son. Biggest thing is What can they do to help their situation? any Resources? Obviously my Friend is Stressed out.
Finance
Disability
Posted 6 mo ago
Responses: 3
Perhaps a Conservatorship may be an option. It has all the joys and responsibilities for financial and medical powers of attorney. This is a court-appointed post under a local judge's control and is frequently made available due to an unexpected illness or disability
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A death in the family brings out the vultures in the family. I assume their mother is dead or there was a divorce. When my grandfather died, cousins hired a U-Haul and emptied the house in less than 24 hours. it was not even possible to get an inventory of any of his personal possessions.
If their father is still mentally competent. He should make out a will. In that will, he should appoint an executor whom he trusts. That executor may not be, and probably shouldn't be a family member, and should not be entitled any part of the estate other than standard executor fees. If their father is not mentally competent, they should petition the court to have a judge appoint an executor.
My personal opinion. Upon their father's death, liquidate any financial assets. Pay off any creditors and tax debt. Divide the remaining financial assets. Then hold a family only "auction" where the family is limited to the amount of cash they received.
Everybody gets their cash back when the auction is done. But they don't get to bid on personal items anymore when they zero out.
If their father is still mentally competent. He should make out a will. In that will, he should appoint an executor whom he trusts. That executor may not be, and probably shouldn't be a family member, and should not be entitled any part of the estate other than standard executor fees. If their father is not mentally competent, they should petition the court to have a judge appoint an executor.
My personal opinion. Upon their father's death, liquidate any financial assets. Pay off any creditors and tax debt. Divide the remaining financial assets. Then hold a family only "auction" where the family is limited to the amount of cash they received.
Everybody gets their cash back when the auction is done. But they don't get to bid on personal items anymore when they zero out.
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PVT Skyler Brown
thank you for your Input! I will relay this Information to him! the More people comment, the closer we get to finding a solution for this guy!
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It is possible that an estate lawyer might be willing to give you a free, very cursory look at the situation. You do not state your friends age, but if he is a resident in the house, and is of legal age, I do notthink that they can seize the house while he lives there, I am not sure about that. In any event, a financial planner or estate lawyer is the best source of information. Since his dad is a veteran, he should reach out to a group like the American Legion or the DAV to see if those illnesses suffered by his father are at all related to his service, under the PACT act. If so, the VA may pick up the ost of long term care. Asset forfeiture only comes into play if Medicaid becomes involved. I went through something similar with my mom. We found that in order to keep the state from seizing all her assets, we had to care for her in home, which we did for 16 years, my wife being the primary caregiver.
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PVT Skyler Brown
I will forward your Answer to him, thank you for your input! I think he has looked at the DAV Angle to no Avail. I really hope they can figure something out, I would hate for him, and whoever else is in the household to go homeless over the whole situation! He is Obviously upset about the whole situation just based on how he is typing his messages out. I'm not sure anyone in his Situation, with his Circumstances would be any less upset about it.... From some of what I have been hearing, he might need to gain Power of Attorney over his Father Based on his Fathers inability to Make informed decisions on his own.
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CPT Lawrence Cable
They won't seize his house while his father lives in it. Even without the PACT act, VA will provide in home care for Veterans. My father in law was a pre Vietnam Draftee that spent most of his time at Ft Eustis, the provided him in home care. If he doesn't require full time care, it's definitely an Option.
The VA does have some long term care facilities, but I would look at State run veterans homes first. My uncle Ray had Dementia, my cousin found him a place in an Ohio Veterans home. It was a very nice facility. There is one for my state about 45 mins. Either way, talk to your state's Veterans Office.
On the house stuff, you can move his assets to a trust, see a lawyer, and take those assets out of his name and out of reach of Medicaid. There is a time that they can still seize it, five years I believe. See an estate lawyer for help.
The VA does have some long term care facilities, but I would look at State run veterans homes first. My uncle Ray had Dementia, my cousin found him a place in an Ohio Veterans home. It was a very nice facility. There is one for my state about 45 mins. Either way, talk to your state's Veterans Office.
On the house stuff, you can move his assets to a trust, see a lawyer, and take those assets out of his name and out of reach of Medicaid. There is a time that they can still seize it, five years I believe. See an estate lawyer for help.
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PVT Skyler Brown
Further Response from my friend on the conversation based on what SSG Roger Ayscue said.
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PVT Skyler Brown
CPT Lawrence Cable - Thank you for your input! I will make sure my friend sees this!. Every response helps us get closer to finding a solution for him!
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