Posted on Oct 5, 2016
What is the best way to tell your unit that you in no way shape or form want an ETS award from them?
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First off, wow kinda surprised this generated any response at all. I was looking more for a "oh hey, just do this memorandum and it's all done." kind of a deal. Anyways as for context, awards here go through about 15 or more corrections for non-grammatical issues. The award hasn't been written yet and I would probably end up writing it anyways. I just don't want to waste anyone's time or my own for that matter with writing an award that a civilian company cares not a whit about that just going to get kicked back over and over and over. I know what I have done and I honestly don't care much for recognition. I'd rather see some of my Soldiers get credited as they go on to do bigger and better things. Do I also have other motivations for not wanting an award yes because there have been several things that have left a bad taste, but I didn't post this to air my dirty laundry, I was just simply looking for advice. Thanks all for the numerous replies. Most were pretty entertaining, and a few were even helpful.
Edited 9 y ago
Posted 9 y ago
Responses: 350
I always found that it was nice to send a troop off to the next assignment or ETS with something to say hey thanks for being part of our unit enjoy your travels. I looked at mine from S Korea and remembered the times I had over there with my squad that was detached from our main company. Heck we gave our camp back to S Korea a few years after I left Camp Howze. I did not get a going away plaque etc when I ETS from my unit in Fort Riley just a formation to say goodbye. Was there 5 years and a formation so I did what I thought was proper held all 199 up for 15 mins flapping my gums then left the Army.
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This is one of my biggest frustrations I had before I retired...having leadership come to someone and ask them to write their own decoration package--HUGE FAIL! You should never be put in that position. Also I would offer your not wasting anyone's time, it's their job to take care of you. As far as whether your next employer will even care, it depends on whether they were in the military or not. If they were, it may come up in discussion and not having one sends a message. Last, some day, far down the road, your children or grandchildren may dig through your files after your gone and they will be able to have a sense of pride when they read the citation. I say that because my father was a 36-year veteran and never discussed any of his service dealings. After he passed I wrote to St. Louis and got his 201 files. It meant a lot to see the other side of the man who shaped most of my life. Don't let any bitterness linger after you leave, it's wasted energy--for what it's worth, thank you for your service!
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My career philosophy on awards is that there are virtual warehouses bursting at the seams due to too many non awarded medals.
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Write your own properly formatted memorandum and sign it. They'll either accept it or your getting an award. Pretty simple actually. ✊
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I didn't want my award.. Told them not even to bother, because it felt like BS... Never bothered giving me one for all the hard work I did throughout my time in, but finally made one because it had to be done. I left July 6, 2016, still haven't received it. Collecting dust somewhere. Also just showed how people don't really care. They had 3 weeks, got kicked back after the training room had it for a week because of a typo, they got it back that same day and was in the training room when I signed out. Even my PSG tried getting it to me after I left for a couple months, but just like everything that place stood for, you aren't anything important to people. once you're gone, good riddance to you. I did get one award during my 3 years there, which was total BS because how many they gave out, just because. There was a 2 week ftx at the Motorpool and the nco's were told write an award for every soldier. About 30 people got an award. One female, got to the unit the second week, was thrown on to fix stuff, broke stuff, and still got a AAM I believe, and only being at her unit for one week. They're handed out like lollipops after a doctors appointment, becoming VERY meaningless.
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Remember the Patton movie speach when he said something about not having to tell your kids about shoveling s*t in Louisiana when asked about what you did in the war? Accept the award with grace and thanks. You can always tell the troops that the award doesn't represent what I have done but what all of us have done.
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So are you getting this award cause your getting out, or end of time with the unit.
I heard jokes how the army goves awards out for anything, but also seen it in the marines, administration pog goes a week without making a mistake and get an award, gunt leads a fire team with no issue and nothing. And the worst was an airforce crew chief getting a bronze star for keeping his a10 running with no issues, he felt ashamed of earning it cause he just got luckly with the plane.
Seems there been an award inflation system in the military, with CO and leaders thinking they must give awards out to improve moral and make their troops more likey to be promoted.
That said i say have a chat with your platoon sgt or 1sgt and ask about the award and why they think you should receive one, and how you feel about it.
I heard jokes how the army goves awards out for anything, but also seen it in the marines, administration pog goes a week without making a mistake and get an award, gunt leads a fire team with no issue and nothing. And the worst was an airforce crew chief getting a bronze star for keeping his a10 running with no issues, he felt ashamed of earning it cause he just got luckly with the plane.
Seems there been an award inflation system in the military, with CO and leaders thinking they must give awards out to improve moral and make their troops more likey to be promoted.
That said i say have a chat with your platoon sgt or 1sgt and ask about the award and why they think you should receive one, and how you feel about it.
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So I just went through this situation I worked in the SPO where officers and NCOs were always at odds . The officers treated us NCOS like crap everyone was in it for themselves and the atmosphere was very immature and unprofessional. I still , being the NCO that I was , did the best I could do to maintain and be professional and excel in my career. When it came time for my award to come I told my MAJ that I in fact did not want an award nor a going away get together bc I was so bitter. What he said to me changed my thoughts entirely . He told me that my award is for me and not for them! If you put in your hard work did the best you can and exceeding the standards in your own mind you EARNED THAT AWARD ITS YOURS! An award seems to be the typical thing to get just because u are pcsing and etsing but THATS NOT TRUE it's to show you how amazing you are and this is what you have to show for it! It's not about them! Another thing is what are you instilling in your Troops? Lead from the front ... can u not accept and award and then write awards for your troops they are watching you and what u do ! A Soldier may look at the fact that you do not want an award and when it comes for you to write there's that they earned may offer you up the same request! Now if your a good leader you would persuade them otherwise like your leadership is doing for you. One last thing what does your future look like as far as the Army goes bc it's about building your career portfolio. What future leadership positions are you trying to fulfill? What future special assignments and duties are you wanting to attain? This is bigger then your personal opinion and thoughts on the unit and others ! This is for you and about you! So what u have to write your award that gives you an opportunity to write out exactly what you know you've done and accomplished! The system is not perfect by far are we supposed to write them ourselves? No ! But I'd rather write my own then have someone that hasn't paid attention to my career and what I've accomplished push something through that doesn't describe me at all! I hope the message came across clear and has helped you! Drive on Backbone! HOOAH
I LATER SAW THAT U WERE ETSING HOWEVER IVE HEARD THIS QUESTION TOO MANY TIMES AND I PRAY IT ASSISTS OTHERS . Good luck on the civilian side.
I LATER SAW THAT U WERE ETSING HOWEVER IVE HEARD THIS QUESTION TOO MANY TIMES AND I PRAY IT ASSISTS OTHERS . Good luck on the civilian side.
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Did it. Got moved into training room while recovering from surgery. Had 2 NCO"S over me (SPC at time) neither stuck around after first formation. Unit deployed, I did all the work. They got ARCOM`s. Since I was lower enlisted I got an AAM. tossed it in trash
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After 6 years with a unit where I never received an award, I PCS'd and now I was put in for an MSM. I would rather of had s couple of timely AAMs than an MSM after I left.
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Don't be a c@@@; Nothing good will come of it. Take the award and move out smartly. ETS/PCS awards means whatever good or bad situation you were in, is now in the past. Not having an award, or having a BS award would prompt a question "who did you piss off and how?" from anybody that reviewed your service record.
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I've heard this argument from more than one of my Soldiers and my answer to them was that they were getting one regardless of how they feel about it. First off, if you contributed in any way to your unit accomplishing their mission it should be recognized, for you, as well as soldiers who are lower ranking than you it is important that they see hard work being recognized. Second, it is important for your children or children's children who may want to know a little about you when you are gone. You also may not think it is important to you now but you may look back on your service in the future and wish you had it.
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Sounds as though you fell your not part of the group, must be something wrong? not accepting the award would be a smack in the face of your commander and your unit, if I was your commander I would insure your departure out of my unit ASAP. Advise you to reconsider your thoughts on this, unless its your way of saying your not happy in your job, position,, and rank. Advice from a retired vet.
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The best way is to tell them directly. I have refused awards because in certain situations I felt that I was getting an award for doing the job and not for anything exceptional, and this is a radical trend in the Army, for rewarding mediocrity. If you tell your first line that under no circumstances will you accept an award or citation, they have to honor that request. Its your OMPF, not theirs.
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I tried to refuse an award once because my supervisor submitted it out of obligation rather than for my accomplishments. In fact, the actual award was supposed to be an MSM and the unnamed individual tried first tried to take credit for the work and then took the easy way out by copying someone else's accomplishments on the recommendation for my award. Of course, the award was poorly written and downgraded to an ARCOM and pushed through the system to meet my Departure deadline. By the truck me I saw the award, it was ready for presentation and was a complete lie. I was ticked and requested to receive the award privately because I planned to turn it in board of record appeals to have it stricken from my record. First off, reward me appropriately for my work. Secondly, if it is going to be downgraded, at least let it be legitimate. The whole situation should disrespect, laziness, poor leadership, and a lack of concern for troops. I thought about throwing it away, but I was too much of a professional to do such a thing.
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You are probably like me. I enlisted because the war on terror was my generations calling. I joined because I did not to be a grandfather telling my grandchildren that I was to much of a B*tch to fight my generations war. I joined becauss it was the American thing to do. I know what I did while in. My family is proud, my wife is proud, and i am proud. Shred my ETS award, it is just a piece of paper.
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Take the award. There are so many people who are never recognized, that getting one seems to the exception to the rule.
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I was awarded an AAM as a PCS award when I was SGT. I felt it was an insult for 3+ years in the unit. After the CDR pinned the medal on me and said the floor was mine to speak, I simply told him "I have nothing to say sir". Later that day I asked to speak with the 1SG but our schedules didn't mesh so I gave the orders and the medal to my PSG and asked him to return them. We had been talking about it for a couple weeks.
I didn't make an ass of myself in front of the lower enlisted, didn't humiliate my CoC or NCO support channel and kept the "insulting" award off of my records.
My advice is tell your CoC you don't want an award, don't get "forced" to write your own, and be professional with whatever action(s) you take.
I didn't make an ass of myself in front of the lower enlisted, didn't humiliate my CoC or NCO support channel and kept the "insulting" award off of my records.
My advice is tell your CoC you don't want an award, don't get "forced" to write your own, and be professional with whatever action(s) you take.
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Regardless if your ending your career or not, as an NCO you know in your gut that no one leaves an organization without recognition. Finish your time strong and take your last award on the way out.
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