What is your funniest salute story?

As a HM3, I was walking out of the Naval Hospital Newport Rhode Island with a butter bar Chaplain, when he whips up nice tight salute. I follow up his example and salute, then look around. All I see is a Navy Chief approaching. The Chief, in blues sporting his rank along with 6 hash marks all in gold, returns the salute. Then promptly, he stops us and begins to give the Padre some quick knowledge on Navy enlisted rank structure. Which ends with, that he should be the one saluting the Ensign, not vice versa, and gold means he had run a clean slate for good conduct. He says "not necessarily true, just that he never was caught." With that the Chief salutes the Ensign, which is smartly returned, and departs. The Ensign looking a little sheepish and me hiding a griin.

In 1968 I was a Torpedoman Seaman Apprentice attending a Class A School at the Anti-Submarine Warfare (ASW) Training Base in San Diego, California. Our class finished in the afternoon and my classmates and I would issue from the building where our class was held and head toward our barracks in group of two or three, but basically in single file. The ASW base also trained Officers in Anti-Submarine tactics and sometimes one of those officers' classes would dismiss at the same time and those officers would all head toward the BOQ or Parking lot in the same manner; small groups but basically single file. What followed was a seemingly endless stream of enlisted men heading one way and a group of officers headed the other way and a whole lot of saluting. But woe betide any officer or enlisted man who might tarry in the classroom building and had to walk past a freshly dismissed class of officers or enlisted men headed the other way, The arm gets a little tired after ten or 20 salutes, you know.

I was stationed at Camp LaGuardia, Korea. We had recently got a new platoon lieutenant that was very uppity, hated dirt, and thought she was better than her soldiers. We would go out drinking with our platoon sergeant on the weekends and he told us he couldn't stand her either! I was on the motor pool line one day under my boat lubing all those points (anyone who has had to do all lube points knows it takes time and focus). I saw two sets of feet stop in front of me and called my name. I rolled out from under my boat and saw it was my platoon sergeant and the lieutenant. As a soldier when we see an officer our first reaction is to salute so I did it while I was laying down, but I had lube on my right hand so I saluted her with my left one. My PS laughed under his breath and she just looked taken aback. After I looked at her face I just smiled and rolled back under my boat.

I was brand new to the Army and in Basic Training for just a couple of days. I was exiting a snack bar with a creamsicle. Just as I was opening the door with the creamsicle stick in my right hand between my forefinger and thumb I had to salute a colonel since we were outside. He was just entering and I was exiting but he must have had a sense of humor because he saluted with a smile and said, "Carry on soldier". Whew, I thought I was going to the brig!

In 1973, while stationed aboard the USS King (DLG-10) , I was walking to the ship wearing my motorcycle jacket when an E-2 coming towards me suddenly saluted. It surprised me and at first I couldn't figure why. As I thought about it I came to the conclusion that he had seen the stars on the shoulders of my jacket and thought I was an Admiral. I've had many a laugh relating that story to family and friends over the last 46 years.

I was just starting in basic training, passed someone with alll kinds of medals on his uniform. I saluted him, and he YELLED at me that he was NOT an officer! He was enlisted and worked for a !@#$! living.

I became sooo flustered that I saluted him with my left hand. I figured right for officers. Left for enlisted. He started yelling again. I started saluting with BOTH hands.

He just stood there glaring. Then shook his head, threw back his head and roared with laughter.

BTW-he was a Command Sgt Maj

When I was an E-4 I was deployed to Al Jabber Air Base, Kuwait. The entire dayshift crew chiefs (aircraft mechanics) flight walked out of the chow hall and right past a very young looking 2Lt. The poor LT had this confused look on his face as NO ONE saluted him. Not one person. Literally nobody saluted this poor man. I was the last person walking out so he stopped me and said, "Excuse me Airman, is this a no-salute area?" I looked at him and said, "No, sir" and kept walking. I didn't salute him, either. Looking back, it was a dick move, but I had to back up my crew if ya know what I mean.

My first week in Marine Corps Boot Camp I was assigned as a Company Runner. I had a rubber band that was removed from an envelope for some reason I held on to it. When our Company CO a hardcore Captain approached me forgetting the rubber band was in my hand I came to attention and saluted my commanding officer. He abruptly stopped and told me to freeze ripping me a new rear end for rendering an improper salute he then grabbed the rubber band stretching it out about 18 inches then released it snapping the hell out of my hand and cheek

When I was first stationed in Vietnam I was at the MACV 2 Compound on Tran Hung Dao in Saigon when I walked by an Army Second Lt. and did not salute. He began to eat my a** out for 'Not Rendering a salute' . Since I was in the Navy and 'uncovered' I informed him that Sailors do not salute when we do not have our hats on. Then he said that since I was in an Army compound I'd have to follow Army Protocol . Just then a Navy Commander passed us (he was covered) and told the Second Lt. what I just said and that was that, I walked away, not saluting.

After about seven years as enlisted/NCO... I had recently graduated flight school where I had become a Warrant Officer Helicopter Pilot... My first duty station after graduating was Ft. Hood, TX. One day as I was walking across the parking lot to clothing sales, there was an armored van with an MP with a shotgun guarding it. As I was walking by him he quickly spun around, swinging his shotgun up towards me and I reflexively ducked and crouched down to prevent being hit by it. Everyone around was laughing so hard... turns out he was snapping to attention and he was saluting me with his shotgun. It all happened so fast... but I definitely avoided being hit with his weapon. People were laughing for a long time.