What's the craziest thing you've seen in the barracks?

Gym formation with CS on the floor, the whole time

We had a pfc in ft knox, back in 98 that wanted to reclass to another mos, but kept being denied, so his idea of getting kicked out of the army was to allow select soldiers to use him as a human toilet, nasty shit, we didn't find out this was going on till graduation, on a lighter note the ds said he always a shit sandwich in uniform, literally I guess

While I was at RAF Lakenheath, UK, I heard a loud banging outside my room on the 2nd floor of the dorm. I opened the door to see a bowling ball go by. Two drunks Had one bowling pin at one end of the hall and were throwing tho bowling ball from the other end of the hall

Basically a guy getting beat down with a bat for some reason,although I have seen many things especially at Coleman Barracks in Germany I was 7th Army in Chinook Helicpopter Division!

During a barracks inspection I had a private that drew dicks fighting people that were stabbing them with pitchforks and spears, wasn't even mad.

Guys flipping bags of weed to the common area so as not to be owning it , Viet Nam . Not my shit sarge .

4 dudes pay a stripper to have sex. She gives them all hiv

During a room inspection, I walked into a 2 person room. I immediately noticed the table in the common area was covered in short curly hairs. Both of these soldiers were blonde, and did not have curly hair. One of them had shaved their nuts over the table and not cleaned it up. The kitchen was a disaster. Old empty food trays were stacked in the corner. The fridge contained a food tray Petri dish, blue milk, and a package of ham that was furry with mold. Moving to the bathroom, thankfully there were 2 razors (not washed), 1 toothbrush, and a bottle of toothpaste. The tub only had a washcloth and a single bottle of body wash, and no curtain or bath mat. Inspected both rooms; one had been sleeping on the bare mattress and was using the green wool blanket as a pillow (it was a darker green/black where the indentation of his head was). At this time a fellow NCO called me back into the bathroom. He pointed out there was only one small stained towel in the bathroom that they had also been sharing. He also noticed there was no toilet paper in the barracks room, not even an empty roll. The other soldier had to move clothes to create a walkway for us to inspect his room. That was by far the nastiest room I had ever seen.

Marine in next cube after waiting 45 min for junk on the bunk inspection, layed down on the floor- fell asleep- SgtMaj + Bn Cmdr woke him up- shit hit the fan- funny now

Soccer games, usually during blizzards, played in the hallway of the 380th BMW (SAC) Headquarters barracks at Plattsburgh AFB NY in 1975. We were all pretty drunk at the time...