What's the craziest thing you've seen in the barracks?

OIF 2010- that October my squad leader received a whole pumpkin from his wife for Halloween, by the time it got to us it was rotten and soggy. Well naturally we cut a hole in the shape of a vagina and placed bets on who will fuck it..... neatless to say theres always that one - a damn private ended putting his dick in, a week later his balls where swollen lol

When I was stationed in Japan we had a health and comfort inspection from the bass Co and I was at the very end of the hall on the third floor Barracks when I saw the Co walking towards my buddies room he opened up the wall Locker nearest to the door and a life-sized Asian sex doll fell out and then my Colonel tackle them cuz they thought it was a real person

1. SgtMaj's teen daughter getting gangbanged.
2. Battalion medical officer's teen daughter getting gangbanged.
3. A couple of sick fuckers had a contest to see who could shoot a load the farthest distance.
4. The company fuckup was on shit detail one night and had to stand at attention and guard the barracks. We wrapped him up in toilet paper and Christmas lights. The battalion CQ found him an hour later and unwrapped him.
5. Many many teenage girls hiding in wall lockers.
6. Too many drunken buffer rodeos.
7. Two drunken idiots decided to put on a midnight hand to hand bayonet fighting class and stabbed each other several times.
8. Snowball fights.
9. Airsoft wars between neighboring companies.
10. We had a full blown rave once.
11. Slip-n-slides.
12. Hired two girls from one of those naked cleaning services for the usual Sunday night G.I. party. They started prancing around with feather dusters and we were like, no, go scrub the toilets. They were pissed.