Posted on Jul 7, 2023
What should I do if I really don't see myself being motivated for another 6 years in the Reserves and don't want to do IRR?
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I'm a recent bct graduate. I tried getting a ELS during basic but they scared me away, I graduated march 17th and i'm trying to ELS now, I'm not in the best position of my life right now and I really don't see myself being motivated for another 6 years though yes "It's only once a month" What should I do? I don't want to do IRR.
Posted in these groups: 
12B: Combat Engineer
12B: Combat Engineer
Posted >1 y ago
Responses: 9
I understand that starting a new commitment can be challenging, especially if you are not feeling motivated. However, it's important to remember that you made a commitment to serve in the United States military, and that commitment should be taken seriously.
If you are struggling with motivation and don't see yourself being able to fulfill your commitment in the Army Reserves, it's important to talk to your superior or a military career counselor (there should be one at your battalion level).
Instead of focusing on “I want to get out”, I would focus instead on “WHY do I want to get out” so you can address the underlying reason. There is a reason that you entered the military and I would revisit that reason and see if it is still applicable and discuss what short-term goals you can do to accomplish your ultimate reason.
I’ve encountered many Soldiers in your situation before where they are going through a period of uncertainty at the start of their military career. Things aren’t exactly how they appeared when they enlisted or they were put off by hitting a difficult obstacle as soon as they started. In most cases, just talking it out (i.e., in ‘real time’) that is in a position to know the challenges of the military, understands the commitment you have, and can give you the perspective of experience can address most issues.
If you want to discuss it with someone outside of your unit, one of the easiest options I suggest is to contact Military OneSource* by phone or chat and request to talk to a peer-to-peer consultant. Military OneSource is just one of many different resources that are available to you and other service members can take advantage of. There are tremendous resources available throughout DoD, but many times the personnel that can take advantage of them don’t know about them.
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* https://www.militaryonesource.mil/benefits/peer-to-peer-counseling/
If you are struggling with motivation and don't see yourself being able to fulfill your commitment in the Army Reserves, it's important to talk to your superior or a military career counselor (there should be one at your battalion level).
Instead of focusing on “I want to get out”, I would focus instead on “WHY do I want to get out” so you can address the underlying reason. There is a reason that you entered the military and I would revisit that reason and see if it is still applicable and discuss what short-term goals you can do to accomplish your ultimate reason.
I’ve encountered many Soldiers in your situation before where they are going through a period of uncertainty at the start of their military career. Things aren’t exactly how they appeared when they enlisted or they were put off by hitting a difficult obstacle as soon as they started. In most cases, just talking it out (i.e., in ‘real time’) that is in a position to know the challenges of the military, understands the commitment you have, and can give you the perspective of experience can address most issues.
If you want to discuss it with someone outside of your unit, one of the easiest options I suggest is to contact Military OneSource* by phone or chat and request to talk to a peer-to-peer consultant. Military OneSource is just one of many different resources that are available to you and other service members can take advantage of. There are tremendous resources available throughout DoD, but many times the personnel that can take advantage of them don’t know about them.
--------------------------------------------
* https://www.militaryonesource.mil/benefits/peer-to-peer-counseling/
Military Life Peer-to-Peer Counseling | Military OneSource
Military service members can take advantage of peer-to-peer counseling to discuss personal or career goals or challenges of military life. Learn more.
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PV2 (Join to see)
Thank you. I'll utilize this and it's how you said. I'm more focused on WHY instead of I want to. I have considered all the possible option and really I don't see Army taking me to position in life where I really wanna be.
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COL Randall C.
PV2 (Join to see) - Based on some of the responses I see you gave others, some advice as you work though this.
The Army makes a substantial investment in training, time, equipment, and related expenses when persons enter into military service. Separation prior to completion of an obligated period of service is wasteful because it results in loss of this investment and generates a requirement for increased accessions.
In almost all situations where the military allows you to be released from your contract early (or they process you for an early separation for failure to meet standards or adverse conduct), you'll be required to repay whatever bonus you might have received.
Another thing is DO NOT listen to "barracks lawyers" who give you a recommendation to do something that would make the Army put you out early. In addition to repaying the bonuses as above, it can impact the characterization of your discharge which could have lasting effects on your after you leave the military.
The Army makes a substantial investment in training, time, equipment, and related expenses when persons enter into military service. Separation prior to completion of an obligated period of service is wasteful because it results in loss of this investment and generates a requirement for increased accessions.
In almost all situations where the military allows you to be released from your contract early (or they process you for an early separation for failure to meet standards or adverse conduct), you'll be required to repay whatever bonus you might have received.
Another thing is DO NOT listen to "barracks lawyers" who give you a recommendation to do something that would make the Army put you out early. In addition to repaying the bonuses as above, it can impact the characterization of your discharge which could have lasting effects on your after you leave the military.
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A1C Medrick "Rick" DeVaney
WHEW : GREAT STATEMENTS.
Clear An Concise.....But I've Never Done Anything I Didn't Want To,
And Most Things Can Lead To Adventures... Then Again, Sometimes You Don't Know What You Like Until You've Tried It....Just Try To Avoid Long Term Decisions Unless You
DO Know You Want To Do Them...As I Look Back, Especially On My Employment Then My Career, I Only Accepted Employment IF I Thought I'd Enjoy It. I Only Struck Out Twice ~ Both Selling Insurance ......But After That, I've Had Fun & Made A Reasonable Living..
Just Ask Yourself: "Do I Really Want That Job Or Even Give It A Shot"?...
Then Spend Time Thinking & Considering What Your Decision Should Be,
And What You WANT To Do...The "WANT" Is Also Critical.....
Don't Take A "JOB"; Only Accept a "CAREER", Or Possibly TEMPORARY Employment.
Clear An Concise.....But I've Never Done Anything I Didn't Want To,
And Most Things Can Lead To Adventures... Then Again, Sometimes You Don't Know What You Like Until You've Tried It....Just Try To Avoid Long Term Decisions Unless You
DO Know You Want To Do Them...As I Look Back, Especially On My Employment Then My Career, I Only Accepted Employment IF I Thought I'd Enjoy It. I Only Struck Out Twice ~ Both Selling Insurance ......But After That, I've Had Fun & Made A Reasonable Living..
Just Ask Yourself: "Do I Really Want That Job Or Even Give It A Shot"?...
Then Spend Time Thinking & Considering What Your Decision Should Be,
And What You WANT To Do...The "WANT" Is Also Critical.....
Don't Take A "JOB"; Only Accept a "CAREER", Or Possibly TEMPORARY Employment.
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You should find some motivation and honor your commitment.
You signed a contract. You CHOSE this. Now go do it.
You signed a contract. You CHOSE this. Now go do it.
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PV2 (Join to see)
You're absolutely right, I might sound irresponsible and like a young brat, and I appreciate the fact that most of you here love what you do. But the truth is, I don't. I don't like the idea of reporting to a unit once a month and being locked into a six-year contract, especially when there are several issues within my unit that they aren't willing to address. On top of that, my unit is far away and neither I nor my parents have a car, so I have to travel four hours using public transport every time I need to go there. Frankly, I'd rather not deal with that. I know the common response is to "suck it up and drive," and I did that during basic training. I could fulfill my contract and be 22 years old, ready to move on with my life. But what bothers me is having to worry about all these things now, alongside other personal concerns. I understand that there are others going through even tougher situations, but the best thing we can do for ourselves is pursue what truly matters to us in life. Unfortunately, military affiliation is not something I desire at this time. Although I appreciate the discipline, personal growth, and other aspects of military life, I have to be honest and say that I'm not ready to commit to the affiliation part. I'm seriously considering my options and I'll do whatever it takes to find a way out of this contract.
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SFC Casey O'Mally
PV2 (Join to see),
COL Randall C. has given you some good advice. And he hinted at stupid "get out of the Army" schemes. But I will be explicit here, since you have stated a "whatever it takes" attitude.
DO NOT do "whatever it takes." Seriously. Pattern of misconduct discharges ruin your future. So do Courts Martial. And the administrative discharges like APFT failure or mental health can drag on FOREVER, if the unit wants them to. In the meantime, they are building your packet for a different, less favorable discharge. And even if you DO manage to get a mental health discharge, that will follow you, too. It may even limit your rights in the future, depending on the characterization.
As many have stated, talk to your NCOs, including retention/career counselor. Follow their advice on how to PROPERLY leave early. Taking any other avenue may sound good now, but the odds are OVERWHELMINGLY in favor of you seriously regretting it down the road. That isn't me trying to scare you, it is me giving you wisdom gained from going around the block more than a couple times and paying attention.
You will NOT be getting out any time in the next couple months. These things take time. So in the meantime, talk to One Source, an MFLC (if you have one available) and/or Chaplain.
And up until you DO get discharged, do your best. You owe it not just to the Army and your unit, you owe it to yourself. You may even find that you like your job, if you actually give it a chance.
COL Randall C. has given you some good advice. And he hinted at stupid "get out of the Army" schemes. But I will be explicit here, since you have stated a "whatever it takes" attitude.
DO NOT do "whatever it takes." Seriously. Pattern of misconduct discharges ruin your future. So do Courts Martial. And the administrative discharges like APFT failure or mental health can drag on FOREVER, if the unit wants them to. In the meantime, they are building your packet for a different, less favorable discharge. And even if you DO manage to get a mental health discharge, that will follow you, too. It may even limit your rights in the future, depending on the characterization.
As many have stated, talk to your NCOs, including retention/career counselor. Follow their advice on how to PROPERLY leave early. Taking any other avenue may sound good now, but the odds are OVERWHELMINGLY in favor of you seriously regretting it down the road. That isn't me trying to scare you, it is me giving you wisdom gained from going around the block more than a couple times and paying attention.
You will NOT be getting out any time in the next couple months. These things take time. So in the meantime, talk to One Source, an MFLC (if you have one available) and/or Chaplain.
And up until you DO get discharged, do your best. You owe it not just to the Army and your unit, you owe it to yourself. You may even find that you like your job, if you actually give it a chance.
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SFC Casey O'Mally
PV2 (Join to see) Also...
I did a little over 20 years. For about 6 of those I absolutely hated what I was doing. For another 6 I simply didn't like it. For another 5, I was OK with it. Only about 3 of those years did I love what I was doing.
But for ALL of those years, I had signed a contract. And for ALL of those years, I was willing to sacrifice for the greater good. I knew that what I was doing was important, and needed to be done.
At some point in every single one of my enlistment, I was absolutely positive I was getting out as soon as my contract was up. And yet..... on not a single one did I get out as soon as my contract was up. Even my last (indefinite) enlistment, I didn't retire right at 20, I did an extra 8 months to help my unit out with deployment.
It isn't about loving what you do; it isn't about doing what you love. It is about stepping up and doing what needs to be done.
I did a little over 20 years. For about 6 of those I absolutely hated what I was doing. For another 6 I simply didn't like it. For another 5, I was OK with it. Only about 3 of those years did I love what I was doing.
But for ALL of those years, I had signed a contract. And for ALL of those years, I was willing to sacrifice for the greater good. I knew that what I was doing was important, and needed to be done.
At some point in every single one of my enlistment, I was absolutely positive I was getting out as soon as my contract was up. And yet..... on not a single one did I get out as soon as my contract was up. Even my last (indefinite) enlistment, I didn't retire right at 20, I did an extra 8 months to help my unit out with deployment.
It isn't about loving what you do; it isn't about doing what you love. It is about stepping up and doing what needs to be done.
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PV2 (Join to see), you are under contract. Aside from speaking to a Retention NCO and your Company Commander and 1SG to discuss your option for "getting out" of your contract, you are on the hook.
My advice is make the best of it. You signed up for one of the best MOS's (in my opinion), depending on your civilian career goals.
Set yourself some goals. One benefit of being a reservist is to give yourself an advantage among your peers in competing for jobs. It is understood that an Army trained Soldier has more discipline and motivation than the average worker. But you have to get after your Army goals.
Show up to Battle Assembly and learn as much as you can. Start training and learning now to compete for Sapper School. Knock out DLC I now so when you are eligible for promotion you are ready for Basic Leader Course. Prepare for Urban Breacher Course, Explosive Ordinance Clearance Agent Course, and maintain peak physical fitness.
Motivation is not a default setting. It is something you give yourself. Leaders here can be very good at helping you find yours, but in the end it is up to you. You have to rediscover the reason you wanted to join in the first place. Exploit that and "Be all you can be".
My advice is make the best of it. You signed up for one of the best MOS's (in my opinion), depending on your civilian career goals.
Set yourself some goals. One benefit of being a reservist is to give yourself an advantage among your peers in competing for jobs. It is understood that an Army trained Soldier has more discipline and motivation than the average worker. But you have to get after your Army goals.
Show up to Battle Assembly and learn as much as you can. Start training and learning now to compete for Sapper School. Knock out DLC I now so when you are eligible for promotion you are ready for Basic Leader Course. Prepare for Urban Breacher Course, Explosive Ordinance Clearance Agent Course, and maintain peak physical fitness.
Motivation is not a default setting. It is something you give yourself. Leaders here can be very good at helping you find yours, but in the end it is up to you. You have to rediscover the reason you wanted to join in the first place. Exploit that and "Be all you can be".
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I would like to chime in with the motto of Engineers. ESSAYONS. Let us try. You're wanting to give up before you've even really began. Try it. You may see blight right now, but down the road the light will shine. I wanted to/tried to quit in Basic Training so many years ago, but I had NCOs that motivated me to stay the fight. All you need is proper mentorship from folks in your unit amd/or from the Army at large. Hell, I'll be your mentor if you want.
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Everyone I served with thought they were in over their head in the beginning. Everyone I served with at one time swore they would never reenlist. For those that did, no one ever regretted it.
In college, I never met anyone ashamed of their degree, but a lot that regretted dropping out. In military service, I never met anyone who were sorry they joined, but a lot that regretted not staying in.
In college, I never met anyone ashamed of their degree, but a lot that regretted dropping out. In military service, I never met anyone who were sorry they joined, but a lot that regretted not staying in.
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You are already struggling? You haven't really even started yet. It feels like there has to be more to the story here.
What changed since you enlisted?
If the issue is the commute is there a closer Unit you may be able to transfer to a closer unit but not having a personal mode of transportation will be a problem regardless.
Life is full of challenges and solutions and Military life is no different. Personally I think you should honor your commitment and find a solution to your problems revolving around making it to Drill. Carpool, Public Transportation, or maybe you and your parents can pool together to get a family vehicle. Good Luck on what you decide.
What changed since you enlisted?
If the issue is the commute is there a closer Unit you may be able to transfer to a closer unit but not having a personal mode of transportation will be a problem regardless.
Life is full of challenges and solutions and Military life is no different. Personally I think you should honor your commitment and find a solution to your problems revolving around making it to Drill. Carpool, Public Transportation, or maybe you and your parents can pool together to get a family vehicle. Good Luck on what you decide.
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I know as a young soldier it seemed like 6 years was an eternity. But it will go by fast. I know that if would have quit I would have probably regretted doing so. Maybe look into changing MOS to something that you are more interested in or doing another school to enhance your career. But if you truly hate its then you should talk to your units career counselor on your options. Whatever you do don't just stop going to drill
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It should be finding a way to motivate yourself to get through your problems and stay motivated your negative attitude will show in your performance and among your reservists. Your duty performance and s***** attitude will be like a carcass for the Wolves to chew on try to motivate yourself after being nod on you think you have a bad now
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