What would make American Legions and Veteran of Foreign War posts more appealing to join for you?

I have mixed feelings about this, I experienced much the same thing about my service Seeing a little of both sides of the story, How ever the way i see it most things that are complained about are easy to deal with if the support chain is intact. However each post is different Depending on the post Commander.
Much like the Actual Military if you have Idol people you have bitterness, and that bitterness breads difference of opinion. Now let me say that the idol is a killer for these groups. and two many post create less Monies to support the groups. Be Honest you need money to keep post running.
Ask your self Questions like what do i expect from this group, what can i do to be a PRODUCTIVE member. My father was a member after WWII seen What it was like then. I enlisted in the early 70's became a member after my first tour I found have a cup of coffee (normally free) chat a bit but avoid the person with to many questions. I also found most folks to be Happy to tell you half truths of their time spent. I would ignore this and have my coffee and move on. I remember going into the VFW while stationed in Colorado i was well accepted because i was still active Duty. I liked going in for breakfast and coffee on the weekends. I said good morning to everyone as usual one person just popped of with F>>> you what you so happy about? I simply said I am alive and moved on. No resentment or drama. I came up on the list for an NCO to Visit and assist a Family who had just lost their Viet-Nam Vet. I was to assist the family in Get the funeral, and other affairs. My Mission required Dress Uniform I made and appointment went on Friday to Visit the family (this was to be one of the hardest things i would do in my 22 plus years in service) I left the Family around 1600 Hrs and went where else the VFW Never Drank beer in there before but in dress uniform and all i Bellied up to the bar and Ordered one The Post Commander approached me What is up with the uniform i explained and he said wow Rough Day and bought my second round. On Monday I had to follow up with the family. I had mentioned this to the Commander of the post and didn't think much about it.
The Commander already had the notice for a Funeral detail And had made an Appointment to meet the family on Monday. Now he taxed Mr. Grumpy and one of the Viet-Nam female Nurses a Capt. To go They dress in VFW uniforms and me in greens we met unplanned in the Funeral home parking lot. To meet with family and the funeral home managers to get everything set It Went smooth as butter.

Now i told you that to say this Mr. Grumpy that night at the VFW Bought the first round and The Capt. Nurse the Second and The post commander the Third. I declined to drink and had only Coffee. I got a lot of strange looks and Mr. Grumpy growled at me what you to good to drink with me. I said No i am still on duty until 1600 hrs and not allowed to drink on Duty, I would show you and your family That same respect. Funny How Mr. Grumpy's attitude changed after that.
The Funeral and all Scheduled on Thursday 1500 Hrs. Everything went as planned out by 1800 Hrs. I went to the VFW i already was behind three drinks at the bar, Now the finish this Mr. Grumpy was a WWII Vet. Capt. a Viet-Nam Vet. Post Commander A Viet-Nam vet. and me and Viet-Nam Era Vet. We all were suddenly friends and that was because we had something to do and teamed up but put all else aside.

The point is That i have not seen that since in the VFW Members just have to much time with nothing teaming them together.
Just for the Record I am not to this day a active Member of the VFW For reasons that i choose not to mention here. JMTC

I'm Retired Army and was never in a combat zone, and therefore not eligible for VFW membership. That being said I have been attending my local VFW for at least 15 years. I have not witnessed or been the object of what was said by this person. I have always felt welcome and have many friends there. Maybe it could be just his VFW, in that case I would encourage you to find another one.

they need to help veterans with transport,when needed.

I recently approached a booth of the VFW at a local arts and crafts show. When I walked up & told them I was a veteran, they told me I could join the wives’ auxiliary. I didn’t go overseas to Vietnam, but I served during the war and so am considered a Vietnam era vet. They need to understand that women filled vital administrative roles that helped them get the support they needed stateside. I’m just as much a veteran as they are.

THEY HAVE TWO VERY HARD OBSTACLES TO OVERCOME
1) Part of what is needed is time, something VFW and AL might not be able to afford. Time is needed for our youngest veterans. The US government has asked them to do A LOT; and the organizations want them to "serve more"? That is not a winning marketing campaign. Many young warriors do not want to be reminded of their service either, which is at the heart of everything VFW and AL is involved. Someday, these young people might want to join; but it won't be for a little while. If the clubs do not adapt, they will no longer be relevant, and eventually go away.
2) Another thing they should consider, there are not the same amount of veterans there used to be. Fewer military members means fewer people eligible to join.

they need to investigate the person applying for membership.

When I got home and out of the Army in 1969 I went to the local chapter of the VFW in Oakland Ca. I was told I hadn’t served in a war cause Vietnam wasn’t a war! I spent 2 years there as a Huey Crew Chief and door gunner, I like all the other guys and girls who were there knew what a war was cause we lived it. To be told you weren’t a Combat Veteran was the biggest slap in my face I could imagine. Our country hated us and spit on us during the 60’s through the 90’s and to have Veterans turn their backs to us was one of the worst moments of our lives. I have never forgotten that nor will I, the VFW can end today and I wouldn’t shed tears for it. I ended up with the Vietnam Veterans of America since the early 90’s and haven’t looked back. I feel for the Veterans who today try to join the VFW and are told the same lies they told us but now they’re Nam Vets spouting that BS.

I’ve also been asked are you a Vietnam veteran or do you have the expedition medal? The Army chose to sent me to Korea instead of Vietnam.

I have experienced the same, and I too have membership from their national headquarters.

Like most others here, the “old guard” looks down on the younger veterans. I’m not taking anything away from your 12 month tour in Vietnam but let’s talk about 4-6 of them.
Now all they want to do is sit around day drink and talk about how the kids of today (us) has turned the country to crap.
Hard pass.
Still a life member of the VFW, American Legion and DAV not at any one post but “at large” membership.