Why can’t an enlisted soldier date an officer?

Happens all the time in the National Guard. I know many

When I was stationed in England one of the Master Sergeants was married to a Major. He was an aircraft maintenance production superintendent and she was the Dental Squadron Commander. No one had a problem with this because she wasn't in his chain of command.

I think that if you can keep the military life and private life completely separate and the person you are dating isn't in your chain of command then it should be fine. I think this should go for enlisted to enlisted also. At the same duty station we had multiple crew chiefs that were married to each other and while they didn't work on the same helicopter they were in the same section.

It seems the policy has flip-flopped a few times. It was allowed under certain conditions when I was on active duty 73-79. I worked at an Army Hospital and there were a couple enlisted-officer marriage, then later I heard it was no longer permitted. Obviously, one could not be under command or supervision of the other. I generally think it should be allowed. You could also have the situation where two enlisteds are married and one gets a commission later. Ive known some situations where that happened. Finally in the reserves, it should certainly be allowed there as I believe that the military shouldn't dictate relationship choices in civilian life. However, obviously, once the commander is aware of such a relationship or marriage, make sure ones not directly commanding or supervising the other. (Even where you have 2 NCO or officers together, one still should not supervising the other.)

I have a friend from WA who was a Navy E-5 married to an Army 02, but they were married before his wife was commissioned. His command (mostly the E7 and above and JO's who tried hitting on his wife at command functions) used to give him trouble over it, despite it being legal under the UCMJ. To my knowledge, that's the only acceptable route, although I think the logic behind the reg is a bit archaic.

I agree, you miss out on so many great people, that you come into contact with. This is not the 1700's of kings, lords and dukes who where the officers and the peasant or fieldworkers were the enlistlisted. There is no true distinct difference anymore beside a 4 year degree.

As long as one doesn't have a direct effect on the other, I don't see an issue personally. I know its against all sorts of fraternization rules and what have you... but I have friends who are much higher ranking than myself, and I see it no different; as long as they aren't unprofessionally effecting your career in some way (i.e. favoritism) it doesn't hurt discipline or harm unit cohesion.

I know others would disagree though.

Its probably an outdated reg in some respects. Although I believe one of the reasons I have heard it is not aloud is the appearance of impropriety. I think a lot has to do with back in the day when there was more off duty interaction among peers. I remember back when my dad was officer in the 80's that they all would meet up at the O club after work etc, which is a tradition that has faded away. when the services were a good ole boys club, it was thought that even though you may not be in the same command you might be buds at the O'club with said enlisted person's boss. Lets say that person get s promoted or awarded, there could be the look that you may have had some indirect influence on it. In some cases that might actually happen.

It is fraternization between an officer and enlisted. But it is still not legal between senior enlisted and junior enlisted if they are in the same command. The Air Force has tried and convicted a couple SNCO's for having improper relationships with Airman. One of them was a potential contender for the CMSAF. Former Chief, now Airman Basic William Gunnery was the Command Chief Master Sergeant of the AF Material Command hewas using his influence as a MAJCOM top enlisted to do favors for female Airman who in turn would be part of his swingers parties. Those Airman were given top Majcom level recognition even thought they were not top performers in their squadrons at Wright-Patt. Those Airman had a SNCO who was getting real suspicious and finally invoked an investigation after Gurney tried to pull rank on another Chief who was their direct chain. Consequently he was busted down to china town flushing a 28 year career down to a Bad Conduct Discharge.

Can't say that I've often seen the mil-to-mil thing work out for both the unit and the couple.

The policy it of itself is kind of crazy these days with there no longer being officer and NCO clubs on post, now there are community clubs which are open to all ranks. This dilemma has came up many times especially when folks meet down range in say Nashville. Is the first question out of your mouth when you meet someone of the opposite sex, do you have an military ID card? Some folks beat around the bush not divulging their position due to OPSEC or whatever. There are many instances where folks have gotten married from the opposite ranks, back in the day it was fine as long as the were not in the chain of command or area of influence. Not sure it ever will come back to that, but we will see, heck they have to get UCMJ re-written now also.

I have seen this happen in all branches and am not sure why it has not yet been addressed as have the other issues you mentioned. However, it does seem as if it only becomes a UCMJ issue when it interferes with the mission, affects leadership and command, or someone catches wind and gets jealous. I think one of the reasons it hasn't change is because some folks choose to look the other way, or sweep it under the carpet.