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The word respect can hold many different meanings to an individual. According to the dictionary, respect is defined as: “a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements”. Though the definition of a word is rarely subjective, actions reflecting that word can be.
America is a melting pot of races and religions, and so is the U.S. military. It is for this reason that one should always conduct him/herself in a respectful manner and be completely aware of what is being said – especially when dealing with controversial subjects. All members of the military should be respectful of the cultures of those they serve with, just as they should expect the same level of respect from their comrades.
One of the greatest aspects about the military is that when you join, you become a part of a family. No matter where you come from, you suddenly have a greater purpose and you become a part of something much larger than yourself. In a way, your military environment becomes a part of your identity. Fostering an environment of respect and acceptance is two-fold. Not only are you accepting the service members already serving, but you are also aiding in creating a positive environment for future service members. Though the push for respect across cultures in the military is present, it is often not executed. It is time to create a culture of respect and diversity.
There will always be times when you will disagree with others, but the true reflection of your character shows in how you carry yourself in those times. By lashing out and calling someone a racist slur out of aggravation just looks bad on you and solves no problems. When you are in the military, you are part of a family; you need to stand with your family and not apart. A hope of RallyPoint is to garner these feelings of mutual respect and continue to work towards a symbiotic relationship - despite any cultural differences - within the entire military community. Together, we are all fighting for the same thing: a better life for our future generations and for ourselves. How much does the display of respect mean to you in your life?
America is a melting pot of races and religions, and so is the U.S. military. It is for this reason that one should always conduct him/herself in a respectful manner and be completely aware of what is being said – especially when dealing with controversial subjects. All members of the military should be respectful of the cultures of those they serve with, just as they should expect the same level of respect from their comrades.
One of the greatest aspects about the military is that when you join, you become a part of a family. No matter where you come from, you suddenly have a greater purpose and you become a part of something much larger than yourself. In a way, your military environment becomes a part of your identity. Fostering an environment of respect and acceptance is two-fold. Not only are you accepting the service members already serving, but you are also aiding in creating a positive environment for future service members. Though the push for respect across cultures in the military is present, it is often not executed. It is time to create a culture of respect and diversity.
There will always be times when you will disagree with others, but the true reflection of your character shows in how you carry yourself in those times. By lashing out and calling someone a racist slur out of aggravation just looks bad on you and solves no problems. When you are in the military, you are part of a family; you need to stand with your family and not apart. A hope of RallyPoint is to garner these feelings of mutual respect and continue to work towards a symbiotic relationship - despite any cultural differences - within the entire military community. Together, we are all fighting for the same thing: a better life for our future generations and for ourselves. How much does the display of respect mean to you in your life?
Culture
Respect
Command Post
Edited 11 y ago
Posted 11 y ago
Responses: 40
42
42
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I think as a society, we have transitioned to a point where we spend so much time bending over backwards trying to please everyone, that we have forgotten how to make people earn little things like respect. I see too many people of all ages who expect respect like its air. There are also too many who don't believe they should give respect to others who have earned it.
And the problem is not just with subordinates giving respect to leaders. Respect goes both ways. After working for not one, but two bosses who have no concept of respect, I know first hand how frustrating this can be. Unfortunately, these are two men who spend all of their time kissing butt and trying to make themselves look good, and are more than willing to do so by throwing their subordinates under the bus.
I have always like a saying by Jaime Escalante. If you are not familiar with the name, please go rent the movie Stand & Deliver (1988). In the movie when the other teachers say the students can't handle the harder math assignments, Jaime replies with, "A student will rise to the level of expectation." We see this all of the time in the military. When the bar is set higher, we rise to reach it. The bar of respect has been set so low, its means little. Maybe its time to set that bar up high again. Instead of letting everyone get away with complaining about minor details in order to advance in their careers, we start making people earn the respect they expect to receive and in turn teach others how to give respect when its earned.
And the problem is not just with subordinates giving respect to leaders. Respect goes both ways. After working for not one, but two bosses who have no concept of respect, I know first hand how frustrating this can be. Unfortunately, these are two men who spend all of their time kissing butt and trying to make themselves look good, and are more than willing to do so by throwing their subordinates under the bus.
I have always like a saying by Jaime Escalante. If you are not familiar with the name, please go rent the movie Stand & Deliver (1988). In the movie when the other teachers say the students can't handle the harder math assignments, Jaime replies with, "A student will rise to the level of expectation." We see this all of the time in the military. When the bar is set higher, we rise to reach it. The bar of respect has been set so low, its means little. Maybe its time to set that bar up high again. Instead of letting everyone get away with complaining about minor details in order to advance in their careers, we start making people earn the respect they expect to receive and in turn teach others how to give respect when its earned.
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MAJ Monique Salinas
LTC Hillary Luton Ma'am, I agree. It does go both ways. Soldiers are craving to respect the individual, not only the rank. I understand when they say they don't feel respected, they are referring to respecting their level of responsibility, their age, and their experience (occupation as a civilian). I don't look at rank, I see everything else beyond that and hold them to the standard of their level of responsibility. Should they exceed the standard, I am confident to assign them to greater levels and challenging assignments.
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SGT Bryon Sergent
PO1 Jeff Doan, yes the person deserves respect for the position they have attained, but you don't have to respect the person holding it. I was always taught respect the rank. It is vital for good order in the military. But because they are a bad leader, no. Put it in your tool bag and use it to shape yourself into the leader you DON'T want to be.
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Good question/comments. I would argue that respect has not lost its meaning but rather we as a society are individually and collectively failing to adhere to the standards of respect for a variety of reasons:
- Respect not enforced by parents as in days prior. Kids will do what their parents enforce both as young kids but also later in life as adults when no one in authority is there to see it.
- Helicopter parents leading to kids who do not know/understand responsibility at a young age (not my fault I am disrespectful, it is because of X in my childhood).
- Fear of "offending" somehow leading to lack of calling someone out when needed or calling things as we see them (Fort Hood as workplace violence rather than terrorism).
- Growth of Internet leading to decrease in personal connection and growth in anonomity. Therefore people doing person to person what they do on the net.
- Respect not enforced by parents as in days prior. Kids will do what their parents enforce both as young kids but also later in life as adults when no one in authority is there to see it.
- Helicopter parents leading to kids who do not know/understand responsibility at a young age (not my fault I am disrespectful, it is because of X in my childhood).
- Fear of "offending" somehow leading to lack of calling someone out when needed or calling things as we see them (Fort Hood as workplace violence rather than terrorism).
- Growth of Internet leading to decrease in personal connection and growth in anonomity. Therefore people doing person to person what they do on the net.
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CPT Pedro Meza
I agree with SSgt Alexander about it being a self inflicted, but will point out that we have become a reflection of the reality TV personalities, we have become a society that is self pleasing and self observed and that has has given us a false sense of having the right to say and do as we please. The sad part is that when questioned we are quick to respond with the our Constitutional Rights but fail to make use of them during election time as represented by voting participation.
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Respect is in deeds and words. I generally give everyone the benefit of the doubt and treat them as I would like them to treat me.
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SGT Bryon Sergent
Again we get away from times before. Everyone doesn't like when people quote Christianity but the golden rule is " Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you!"
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I am constantly amazed by the lack of respect I see in the civilian workforce. I've been retired for 10 years now, and I still answer people with a yessir or No Maam. I refuse to be a part of discussions which are disrespectful of others, whether it is race, religion, gender or orientation. I immediatly correct people when they use disrespectful terms about their co-workers, or slurs of any kind. Not just because it is law, and policy, but because it serves no other purpose but to disparage another person.
I believe one of the reasons that we see some of the division in America today is due, in part to the lack of respect we have grown accustomed to. We no longer complain when a store worker treats us badly. We fear to "offend" someone if we hear them speaking badly about someone. It's so much easier to lower our eyes and pretend we didn't hear that slur. We laugh and forward that email on rather than delete it... get the picture?
There is nothing wrong with being respectful to our elders, to holding a door open for someone, male or female. It is totally appropriate to correct someone when they use inappropriate language. It is ok to be proud of your heritage, of your country. It is also important to be respectful of the other person's pride in their culture, in their native country. It is important to not only respect the other guy's faith, but to understand it, and know that one of the great things about America is that ALL are welcome, it is what we were founded upon all those years ago. It is what we all fought for, bled for, and in many cases, died for.
When we use the word Respect, we must be mindful that it is a two way street. If a person shows respect, then generally, they will receive respect. I try and treat everyone with respect, even those whom I dont get along with, or those who I have fundamental differences with. It is one of the great things I kept from my military career, and one of my most cherished.
I believe one of the reasons that we see some of the division in America today is due, in part to the lack of respect we have grown accustomed to. We no longer complain when a store worker treats us badly. We fear to "offend" someone if we hear them speaking badly about someone. It's so much easier to lower our eyes and pretend we didn't hear that slur. We laugh and forward that email on rather than delete it... get the picture?
There is nothing wrong with being respectful to our elders, to holding a door open for someone, male or female. It is totally appropriate to correct someone when they use inappropriate language. It is ok to be proud of your heritage, of your country. It is also important to be respectful of the other person's pride in their culture, in their native country. It is important to not only respect the other guy's faith, but to understand it, and know that one of the great things about America is that ALL are welcome, it is what we were founded upon all those years ago. It is what we all fought for, bled for, and in many cases, died for.
When we use the word Respect, we must be mindful that it is a two way street. If a person shows respect, then generally, they will receive respect. I try and treat everyone with respect, even those whom I dont get along with, or those who I have fundamental differences with. It is one of the great things I kept from my military career, and one of my most cherished.
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Cpl Anthony Pearson
COURTESY is important, and everyone should be courteous. When I see someone being rude to another person, I pretty much cannot control myself and I insert my thoughts into the situation. I stand up for people when I see that happen.
RESPECT can be taken a few ways. I believe that respect is earned over time, and not always 'automatic'. You can be courteous, without respecting someone.
Anyway, great post and a good topic to be sharing with PEOPLE WHO HAVE EARNED MY RESPECT thus far. Thank you for your service, brothers and sisters.
RESPECT can be taken a few ways. I believe that respect is earned over time, and not always 'automatic'. You can be courteous, without respecting someone.
Anyway, great post and a good topic to be sharing with PEOPLE WHO HAVE EARNED MY RESPECT thus far. Thank you for your service, brothers and sisters.
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I use the terms "sir" and "ma'am" with people at work who aren't my coworkers/peers. The first day I was on the job, I called my boss (who is apparently younger than me) sir. There was a kid, and I do mean kid because he's all of 20, sitting next to me. He scoffed and said "Sir? What are you, in the military?"
I looked him straight in the eye and said "I was a professional soldier for ten years. Is that okay?"
He looked away first, mumbling something about "sure thing thanks for your service."
Respect isn't everything in this world, but it sure does occupy a big chunk of it. I personally choose to believe that respect will get us a lot farther than being a smartass. Which is probably a lesson I should have learned as a mouthy junior enlisted. Anyone got a time machine?
I looked him straight in the eye and said "I was a professional soldier for ten years. Is that okay?"
He looked away first, mumbling something about "sure thing thanks for your service."
Respect isn't everything in this world, but it sure does occupy a big chunk of it. I personally choose to believe that respect will get us a lot farther than being a smartass. Which is probably a lesson I should have learned as a mouthy junior enlisted. Anyone got a time machine?
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SPC (Join to see)
You can tell veterans around the workplace. Veterans tend to address superiors as "sir/maam", and tend to practice "cover and concealment" to avoid being placed on work details. Our leadership makes it a point to release non-veterans from meetings early, and then makes the veterans stand around for 2 hours, followed by police call around the corporate campus. I feel honored to work for a veteran-friendly employer.
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SSG Tim Everett
MAJ Monique Salinas I've started saying sir/ma'am to everyone unless we're personal friends.
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1SG Michael Blount
SSG Tim Everett - I reserve "sir" or "maam" if I'm addressing somebody I don't know or can't tell where they fit into the food chain
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SSG Tim Everett
1SG Michael Blount I started doing that, but I sort of adopted it as a "personal quirk".
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Without respect we have nothing. To be respected by subordinates, peers and supervisors is a great accomplishment and helps measure your total effectiveness as a leader. But the old saying respect is earned is very true in the military culture. And hopefully that respect you have accumulated and earned in the military can help you earn it in your civilian endeavors. So I do not believe respect has lost its meaning and is alive and well here on Rally Point.
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Military bearing as discussed by SPC Brandon "Wheelz" Wheeldon is something I have brought with me to my work force as well. We have a few veterans in my office and two other military retirees (both USAF). We discuss often how bearing, respect, selfless service, and duty are overlooked in many ways by our counterparts. Not to say they are bad people or bad workers, but the camaraderie we share as service members is missing. The esprit de corps, unit integrity, and team spirit is somehow missing as well.
I have also seen subordinates be disrespectful to seniors in open forums such as meetings. I find this impossible to understand and accept. I always speak to the person who was disrespectful and try to share the importance of maintaining bearing and displaying respect for the position. I also explain the way to disagree is respectful and often privately with a senior as opposed to publically where it appears a challenge to their authority.
This is / has been met with mixed results. My internal motto is always to be professional above all else.
I have also seen subordinates be disrespectful to seniors in open forums such as meetings. I find this impossible to understand and accept. I always speak to the person who was disrespectful and try to share the importance of maintaining bearing and displaying respect for the position. I also explain the way to disagree is respectful and often privately with a senior as opposed to publically where it appears a challenge to their authority.
This is / has been met with mixed results. My internal motto is always to be professional above all else.
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I think our society and culture have lost it respect, but every time I start to think this I recall talking with a my fellow NCOs at ANCOC (SLC) and basically talking about this same question. How the kids today...then...longer had respect, patriotism, ETC and I recalled the same thing...basically...being said be Socrates nearly 2500 years ago? We seemed to have been able to just barely hold on since then?
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SFC Dr. Joseph Finck, BS, MA, DSS
MSG Brad Sand I like to think respect still exists and has meaning. People change over time. I know current young service members who are quite respectful and very patriotic in their service.
Each generation comes to terms with their individual and reputation as a group pertaining to respect and patriotism. The E-3 of today is the E-9 twenty years from now, and I believe will expect the respect deserved of the position. We must have faith that, combined with their own free will, our guidance and mentorship will provide an environment which results in respect and patriotism being engendered in our replacements.
Each generation comes to terms with their individual and reputation as a group pertaining to respect and patriotism. The E-3 of today is the E-9 twenty years from now, and I believe will expect the respect deserved of the position. We must have faith that, combined with their own free will, our guidance and mentorship will provide an environment which results in respect and patriotism being engendered in our replacements.
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Respect is something that is taught and learned. Not something demanded. As a child I was taught to respects my elders. Use my manners and to treat people fairly. These lessons followed me through my life. They were useful during my 20 years of military service. I respected others who I worked for and treated my peers and subordinates with respect. In return I earned the respect of others. These same lessons later helped me in industry and serve me well now as a government employee. I have taught my children and grandchildren these same lessons.
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PO2 Skip Kirkwood
Respect comes from the heart, and I (or nobody) can control what is in a person's heart. However, I can demand that a person "act respectfully" whether he or she feels respect or not. As a civilian employer, I don't own my workers, but I rent their behavior for a 12-hour shift, during which I am paying for certain behaviors. Including acting respectfully.
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