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As leaders, we should automatically respect our subordinates at all times. There is a stark difference between leadership and dictatorship. As soon as the leaders in the military figure this out, they will notice a peak in the retention rate of their Soldiers.
I have communicated with over 300 Soldiers who are eligible to extend their enlistment contract within the past few months and was shocked to hear the responses from some of them. One Soldier mentioned, “I would remain in the military but cannot understand why I’m getting cursed out when asked to do something. I am a grown man!” I asked this same Soldier if he’d discuss with his leaders the disrespect he feels and he said that he had spoken with them about it. My final question to him was, “So what did they say?” He replied, “They said that I am a Soldier and if I can’t handle it, get out!”
As a leader myself, I apologized to this Soldier and informed him that some leaders are called leaders because of their position or title, not because of their leadership. I then annotated in the retention book that he was not going to extend his contract but instead, leave the military because of the disrespect from his leadership.
Must a Soldier be a Chaplain to get respected? Can a Soldier who informs his or her chain of command that the speaking of profanity is against their religion be provided the same respect that a chaplain receives? Should fellow Soldiers respect these Soldiers? To me, the answer is quite simple. We should.
I am one of these Soldiers. I am a non-paid minister at a local church. The Soldiers who are aware of this duty respect the fact I am a Soldier and a minister. I've expressed to others that I would like for them to be themselves while in my presence, as I would perceive unrealism if they would change their talk, speech, or attitude just because I was standing around in the vicinity. Some disagreed but others said okay and would use profanity as if I’m not around. It didn’t then and doesn’t bother me a bit. However, there might be Soldiers that are affected by vulgar and demeaning language and I believe this should be respected.
If smoking a cigarette around a non-smoker is a sign of disrespect, I believe using profanity around a non-profanity speaker falls within the same guidelines if the Soldier speaks up. Leaders must understand that profanity can be damning to a lot of people. The “F” word has been known to cause havoc, begin fights, and unfortunately result in someone being killed. To tell a Soldier to deal with the disrespect because you're a Soldier is unacceptable.
This is not a new Army. Respect began when the Army began.
I have communicated with over 300 Soldiers who are eligible to extend their enlistment contract within the past few months and was shocked to hear the responses from some of them. One Soldier mentioned, “I would remain in the military but cannot understand why I’m getting cursed out when asked to do something. I am a grown man!” I asked this same Soldier if he’d discuss with his leaders the disrespect he feels and he said that he had spoken with them about it. My final question to him was, “So what did they say?” He replied, “They said that I am a Soldier and if I can’t handle it, get out!”
As a leader myself, I apologized to this Soldier and informed him that some leaders are called leaders because of their position or title, not because of their leadership. I then annotated in the retention book that he was not going to extend his contract but instead, leave the military because of the disrespect from his leadership.
Must a Soldier be a Chaplain to get respected? Can a Soldier who informs his or her chain of command that the speaking of profanity is against their religion be provided the same respect that a chaplain receives? Should fellow Soldiers respect these Soldiers? To me, the answer is quite simple. We should.
I am one of these Soldiers. I am a non-paid minister at a local church. The Soldiers who are aware of this duty respect the fact I am a Soldier and a minister. I've expressed to others that I would like for them to be themselves while in my presence, as I would perceive unrealism if they would change their talk, speech, or attitude just because I was standing around in the vicinity. Some disagreed but others said okay and would use profanity as if I’m not around. It didn’t then and doesn’t bother me a bit. However, there might be Soldiers that are affected by vulgar and demeaning language and I believe this should be respected.
If smoking a cigarette around a non-smoker is a sign of disrespect, I believe using profanity around a non-profanity speaker falls within the same guidelines if the Soldier speaks up. Leaders must understand that profanity can be damning to a lot of people. The “F” word has been known to cause havoc, begin fights, and unfortunately result in someone being killed. To tell a Soldier to deal with the disrespect because you're a Soldier is unacceptable.
This is not a new Army. Respect began when the Army began.
Religion
Respect
Values
Command Post
Edited >1 y ago
Posted >1 y ago
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MSG (Join to see) MSG, this is a great article which focuses on leadership and the message I received was derogatory leadership (while perhaps a style, even though not a good one) is still used in our professional military realm. That said, there is a time and a place for most things, but a lack of respect in any organization which is built and prides itself on respect is intolerable. Leadership is effecting change. If you as a leader are only able to effect change through yelling and use of profanity, perhaps you should re-visit your leader roots, regroup, and try again. Grant it, I have the foulest mouth of anyone, but I respect the persons around me and rarely use profanity in a setting where I do not know my audience will accept it.
Respect is reciprocal, the more I give, then more I receive. While I expect a new Soldier assigned to me to respect the stripes I wear, I also know through time, effort, and energy that Soldier will grow to respect me because of my professionalism, character, dedication to duty, and leadership. Ultimately for me, leadership was always summed up as "when we succeed the credit goes to the Soldiers, if we fail the responsibility rests with me."
Thank you for this interesting article and for bringing it up in this forum. (Oh and please tell SFC Ann Timmins hello for me)
SFC Joseph M. Finck USA (Ret)
Respect is reciprocal, the more I give, then more I receive. While I expect a new Soldier assigned to me to respect the stripes I wear, I also know through time, effort, and energy that Soldier will grow to respect me because of my professionalism, character, dedication to duty, and leadership. Ultimately for me, leadership was always summed up as "when we succeed the credit goes to the Soldiers, if we fail the responsibility rests with me."
Thank you for this interesting article and for bringing it up in this forum. (Oh and please tell SFC Ann Timmins hello for me)
SFC Joseph M. Finck USA (Ret)
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If I have learned anything from the time I have spent in the military thus far, it is that a good leader knows their troops and knows how to lead them from not only the front, but also the back. A good leader shows you what to do and trusts that you are able to do it well because they have taught you to the best of their ability and you have understood to the best of yours.
A good leader to me is someone that can not only show me what to do and how to do it, but knows without a doubt they have taught me in such a way that I would be able to lead in their absence if it ever became necessary.
A good leader to me is someone that can not only show me what to do and how to do it, but knows without a doubt they have taught me in such a way that I would be able to lead in their absence if it ever became necessary.
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Great article MSG Miles, you are correct in saying that the disrespect is now rampant in today's military. It's sad to see.
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MSG (Join to see)
SPC Buckalew, leaders will either get right or get left. LDRSHIP is the acronym for our Army values but yet some leaders want to skip over the "R."
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It is as simple as knowing your audience. Giving a range brief to my Battalion Commander requires a different speaking style than I'd use when I was out in the field on an exercise with my men. While I'd prefer not to curse at all, sometimes the situation definitely requires the use either as a motivator or a rebuke.
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MSG (Join to see)
1LT (P) Ahmed Faried, the problem isn't the use of profanity. Profanity doesn't bother me until it is directed at me and towards another. When I hear, "Get your fuc_ing a$$ over here Specialist Jones!" I always ask the question, Could I have received the same result If I said, "Specialist Jones, you need to get here now!" It only becomes and issue when one demeans a subordinate because they outrank them. Cursing at a Soldier doesn't make him or her follow orders. The power and influence of your rank and position compels the Soldier to move.
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I'm not really certain what this topic has to do with religion. I know of no theological prohibition against profanity. There is, however, a military prohibition against profanity. Indecent language is a specific subarticle of article 134, aptly titled indecent language.
This is a policy issue, and an enforcement issue, not a religious one.
This is a policy issue, and an enforcement issue, not a religious one.
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SFC Michael Hasbun
What is lewd, obscene, or indecent is completely up to that Commander. Profanity, by definition, fits that bill. Thats what profanity means, profane language.
Still, agreed on the barracks lawyers..
Still, agreed on the barracks lawyers..
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MSG (Join to see)
SSG Michael Hasbun and Tsgt Richard Miller, I respect your comments. I made the mistake by placing the word Religion in the subject line. It's not about religion. It's about respect. For those of us in the Army, it's the third letter of the acronym LDRSHIP. Don't demean junior Soldiers or subordinates just because you outrank them. Show them some respect. This should be automatic. No, don't appease them and baby them as someone said earlier. Cuss/Curse and use the language that we fight for you to use. Just don't demean another Soldier/service-member while doing it.
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1LT Nick Kidwell
It is a policy issue, indeed. However, in Christianity, there are numerous New Testament exhortations to refrain from unwholesome speech.
See the following:
Ephesians 4:29
1 Peter 3:10
James 3:9-12
Jesus Himself states that what comes out of your mouth reflects who you are inside (Luke 6:45).
See the following:
Ephesians 4:29
1 Peter 3:10
James 3:9-12
Jesus Himself states that what comes out of your mouth reflects who you are inside (Luke 6:45).
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SFC Michael Hasbun
Thats more a caution that your words are a reflection of you, which I agree completely with... Not really a prohibition on specific words. The UCMJ is a bit more strict and specific...
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Suspended Profile
Sure, using derogatory statements and cursing is not going to be an effective communication method. That said, the Army is built for a purpose, to kill an enemy during War, this means by default it will attract men and women who hold varying systems of belief. These beliefs differ, and as a result you get friction.
Leadership is surely a two-way street, and it does include mutual respect. So, if a soldier advises his superior that he/she does not like to be cursed at then that superior has a choice to make, either show mutual respect or ignore the request.
The reality of military service is such that many (not all) use a certain aggressive communication style, it gets built-in and as a result f-bombs and various other expletives are used in-place of more civilized forms.
My advice is this, for anyone truly wanting to be a senior Leader in today's military they should learn to adjust their communication style to reflect the more professional nature of today's military. An intelligent person usually senses when others' in their presence are agreeable to gutter-speak.
Frankly, I curse, but not around most people as I know how offensive most people find it.
Last, this will always be an issue, many individuals are emotionally sensitive to words, while this is not good for them it does not obviate the fact that a good leader should be aware of their own level of professionalism at all times.
It seems to me that any Soldier who "wants" to stay in the military and serve will find a way to adjust and do so. Any Soldier who "wants" to find an excuse to leave will do the same.
At the end of the day I simply do not have sympathy for anyone who cannot stand-up for themselves. I had my own woodshed event as a Private when I told my NCO to f-off, this was back in the day of course. It did however quickly teach me who I could and could not tell off...
Leadership is surely a two-way street, and it does include mutual respect. So, if a soldier advises his superior that he/she does not like to be cursed at then that superior has a choice to make, either show mutual respect or ignore the request.
The reality of military service is such that many (not all) use a certain aggressive communication style, it gets built-in and as a result f-bombs and various other expletives are used in-place of more civilized forms.
My advice is this, for anyone truly wanting to be a senior Leader in today's military they should learn to adjust their communication style to reflect the more professional nature of today's military. An intelligent person usually senses when others' in their presence are agreeable to gutter-speak.
Frankly, I curse, but not around most people as I know how offensive most people find it.
Last, this will always be an issue, many individuals are emotionally sensitive to words, while this is not good for them it does not obviate the fact that a good leader should be aware of their own level of professionalism at all times.
It seems to me that any Soldier who "wants" to stay in the military and serve will find a way to adjust and do so. Any Soldier who "wants" to find an excuse to leave will do the same.
At the end of the day I simply do not have sympathy for anyone who cannot stand-up for themselves. I had my own woodshed event as a Private when I told my NCO to f-off, this was back in the day of course. It did however quickly teach me who I could and could not tell off...
MSG (Join to see)
SGT S, well spoken. I do not like those who cannot stand up for themselves either but only if they're an E-5 and above. Sergeants by definition are leaders. I will get off in an E-5 through E-7's butt for using their rank to abuse a junior Soldier just because they can. Profanity doesn't bother me and I'm a minister. However, I will continue to state that we can leave the word religion out of the picture and just focus on respect. I'm not talking battlefield jargon. I'm speaking of respect when we're in Garrison.
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1SG David Spalding
Bingo MSG! It's a leader's job to look out for the welfare of his/her troops, PERIOD! There have been a hundred revisions of AR/FM/ADP etc for leadership, but BLUF, NCOs train their Soldiers, Lead their Soldiers, and Look out for their Soldiers - all else falls within those three directives.
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I think that there is a confusion between respect and, professionalism and leadership for some. Cursing and yelling are disrespectful, but more than that it is unprofessional.
As leaders we have a responsibility to lead by example. For me, respect is earned, but professionalism is required. We can reflect on certain aspects of respect as they pertain to our lives, but at the end of the day it comes down to this, as a member of the Armed Forces we represent not just ourselves, but the citizens of the United States, our behavior says a lot about who we are as a country, not just a soldier. Our unprofessionalism even among ourselves tend to carry to when we are away from the unit, and effects how our subordinates carry themselves.
If we want to be respected we need to be more than how want others to see us, but how we want people to treat us. I always far more respected leaders who were tough but professional than those that barked orders and cursed at me. While respect does go to rank and position, more powerful is that which is earned.
I think the best example I have of this is when I was stationed in Korea, our unit commander and 1SG would spend time talking with and getting to know the soldiers, they held challenges to give soldiers a chance show their skills and earn days off. The next unit commander came in yelling and demanding soldiers followed him, unit moral went down and soldiers begged to leave the unit. We are only as strong as our weakest link and if the weak link is the leadership we are in trouble.
As leaders we have a responsibility to lead by example. For me, respect is earned, but professionalism is required. We can reflect on certain aspects of respect as they pertain to our lives, but at the end of the day it comes down to this, as a member of the Armed Forces we represent not just ourselves, but the citizens of the United States, our behavior says a lot about who we are as a country, not just a soldier. Our unprofessionalism even among ourselves tend to carry to when we are away from the unit, and effects how our subordinates carry themselves.
If we want to be respected we need to be more than how want others to see us, but how we want people to treat us. I always far more respected leaders who were tough but professional than those that barked orders and cursed at me. While respect does go to rank and position, more powerful is that which is earned.
I think the best example I have of this is when I was stationed in Korea, our unit commander and 1SG would spend time talking with and getting to know the soldiers, they held challenges to give soldiers a chance show their skills and earn days off. The next unit commander came in yelling and demanding soldiers followed him, unit moral went down and soldiers begged to leave the unit. We are only as strong as our weakest link and if the weak link is the leadership we are in trouble.
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Currently, I have six soldiers under me. Of those six, one is 19, two are 20, one is 24, one is 26, and the last is 34. Despite the differences in their age, they are all legal adults. When I took over as their squad leader, I told each of them that they are adults and I will treat them as such. We have a job to do, and when that job is done properly and to standard we go home. They know that they can come to me in confidence and ask me questions anytime they want.
My philosophy that I have explained to my soldiers is this: Respect is earned, not given. Though they have to be respectful of my rank and position over them, I need to earn their respect as they need to earn mine.
Showing your soldiers a little respect will give them motivation and drive to move mountains for you, all you have to do is show them that you acknowledge them as adults and human beings. When I say this, I don't mean befriend them and treat them special, I mean establish a good soldier/NCO relationship and make your intentions for them clear, and have them inform you of what they expect from you as their leader. A little communication goes a LONG way when dealing with your subordinates.
My philosophy that I have explained to my soldiers is this: Respect is earned, not given. Though they have to be respectful of my rank and position over them, I need to earn their respect as they need to earn mine.
Showing your soldiers a little respect will give them motivation and drive to move mountains for you, all you have to do is show them that you acknowledge them as adults and human beings. When I say this, I don't mean befriend them and treat them special, I mean establish a good soldier/NCO relationship and make your intentions for them clear, and have them inform you of what they expect from you as their leader. A little communication goes a LONG way when dealing with your subordinates.
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Obviously respect for ones superiors is automatic and must happen at all times.. respect or at least professionalism should be treated down the chain of command and this is where a lot of people in positions of snco or officer power fail, there is a lot of "I'm "x" rank and your not so deal with how i feel that day.". This is a sad thing as leaders are suppose to be seen as people who are the height of military professionalism, not abusers of rank. Power and or position though seem to go to some peoples heads.
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