Army issues waivers to more than 1,000 recruits for bipolar, depression, self-mutilation

Well, CW5 Jack Cardwell, I'm sure that the Army has put their best medical minds to work prior to allowing these enlistments, but I personally believe that over time, the overall retention rate of this "batch" of recruits will prove to be poor and thus a costly error for the Army.

CO - 1stSgt, where is everyone this morning? 1stSgt - They're all still in bed sir, feeling depressed!. CO - Oh Shit.

What could go wrong?