BREAKING: You need to report for a 'random' urinalysis

Ramdon my A**. At National Guard Bureau I was tested 5 times in 2 months. I made some great friends who like i guzzled water and waited for the moment. Odds that me and five others beyond random. We were all close to retirement, not going to screw up this late in the game. Went to the 1st Sgt, he said on it's random. Went i laid out the figures including soldiers who had been in unit over 6 years and had never been tested against 6 solider who had less than 3 years who had been tested 5 times his face turned beet red and he said...it's just random !

I get randomly selected on a regular basis. In the last 10-12 years I could probably count on one hand the number of times I haven't been part of the monthly random 10%. I can't remember the last time I ever went more than 2 months without being selected. It's a running joke in my unit. the lists come with my name already printed on them, if my name isn't on the list then it is invalid, when I retire they are going to put a plaque over one of the urinals with my name on it, etc.

In early 94 at Ft Lewis I was chosen for a random test. A few days later, I don't remember how long it was, the UA NCO came up to me with a funny look on his face and told me that my sample was "contaminated". I told him that I was not worried about it because I had a respiratory infection and was on about five different medications. My number kept coming up until they got a clean sample out of me. I was taking prescribed medication and I took them as ordered by the doctor.