Posted on Oct 30, 2014
SSG(P) Instructor
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What does one do when your spouse doesn't fully support your military career?
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Responses: 15
SCPO Larry Knight Sr.
23
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I can give you some insight on this. My first wife came up at the 17 year mark and gave me an ultimatum, if I were to stay one more term to get a lawyer ? So I didn't see any point in disappointing her, and I went to my CO and requested to reenlist for 6 more years. Then I proceeded to the legal department and they got me in touch with a divorce attorney and I filed for a divorce.
I then went back home and asked if she would like to have a ride to the airport, or take her fat ass and walk to the airport ? This was when I proceeded to tell her she was no longer a part of my standard issue of my "SEA BAG" ! I wasn't going to let a stellar career go down the tubes, just because she cant handle it anymore. My career was my choice and she came into the picture after the fact, My career also helped my children to grow into young adults.
Would have I done anything different , absolutely not and I stand firm with continuing my career regardless !
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Sgt Dale Briggs
Sgt Dale Briggs
7 y
It's sad you had to do that, but 17 years invested with 3 to go seemed like an only choice. She surely should have understand the long term financial implications to bailing early.
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SPC Steven Depuy
SPC Steven Depuy
5 y
Getting out after 17 years, I love my wife but would say so long as well. I will be 60 in 2 months. If I had finished my time in the Army, I could have retired in 1996. If I had finished my time in the PANG I joined after I got out of the army, I would have a pension in a few years. At this point, I have to work until 70 to have any chance of not being a burden on my kids, after getting wiped out financially in the recession in the late 2000's. If she could not deal with 3 more years so you didn't end up like me, good riddance.
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MAJ Dallas D.
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I have been blessed that my wife was a Soldier when I met her and we spent the first 4 years of our marriage stationed together, but she hated the Army. She just wasn't made to be in the military. She never learned how to be politically correct especially when dealing with her superiors. She is one who tells it like it is and if the Battalion Commander would have a stupid idea she would just say Sir that's stupid. It got her in trouble more than once.

Once she got out she loved the Army (LOL). She always supported me through deployments etc.
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SSG(P) Instructor
SSG(P) (Join to see)
>1 y
I appreciate your story, actually the tact part made me laugh. I actually like people that shoot fromantic the hip. Straight shooters, I call them. Sounds like she would of made a fine officer. Oo-rah, carry on.
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SSgt Network Engineer
SSgt (Join to see)
>1 y
MAJ Dallas D. Ha! Your wife sounds like how I was when I was in the service.
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CWO4 Gene A.
CWO4 Gene A.
7 y
Used to be what a good leader would expect from any level of the military. Unfortunately, P C seems to be ingrained in the modern services.
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2LT (Pre-Commission)
2LT (Join to see)
7 y
I'm afraid I have this issue when it comes to tact... I never thought bluntness would be problematic in the military.
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MSG Wade Huffman
7
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My wife fully supported my career the entire time I was in. As a matter of fact, she was extremely saddened when I decided to submit my retirement application.
Some just aren't disposed to a military lifestyle (true for some service members as well). Sounds to me like a serious kitchen table discussion is in order. A successful marriage is all about give and take, compromise, and understanding. Some kind of compromise is necessary, and only the two of you can decide what it will be.
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SSG(P) Instructor
SSG(P) (Join to see)
>1 y
Key word being *fully, she supports it, I just wish it was more. Believe me, there is no more table talk that will change her opinion.
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