Posted on Jan 16, 2015
7 “In-Uniform Rules” Service Members Wish Their Spouses Knew. Any to add?
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With how busy so many Service Members are due to their military duties, it’s sometimes tough to ensure that our spouses are fully up to speed on rules and regulations that may be relevant to them, or to the time we spend together on the installation. Below, we list 7 of the most common “in-uniform rules” spouses should know.
Which ones would you change, and why? What else would you add to this list?
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1. PDA is typically prohibited, except for certain special situations.
Military regulations take public displays of affection (PDA) more seriously than many spouses realize, due to high standards for professionalism. Special situations like a return from a deployment MIGHT be acceptable circumstances for a quick “welcome home” kiss, depending on your chain of command.
2. My right hand is empty for a reason!
While in uniform, Service Members are typically expected to keep their right hand empty while in conditions that would require a salute, which is done with the right hand only. This may seem obvious to SMs, but many spouses do not know this!
3. I can’t talk on my cell phone while walking.
Talking on your cell phone while walking in uniform on base is one of the easiest ways to get jacked up as of late. It’s like putting a target on your chest. We’ve heard countless stories of Service Members witnessing a Senior NCO sprinting across the street to make this correction! Epic.
4. Why I say “no” when you offer me a piece of gum.
Many military units prohibit chewing gum while in uniform, especially while stateside. We’ve heard reports that this may vary depending on the military branch or command policy of the SM, including the degree to which it’s enforced. But just in case, it’s important to know this!
5. I can’t use an umbrella when it’s raining. Seriously.
Uniformed SMs typically cannot utilize an umbrella when it’s raining outside. They have wet weather gear for that, even though that gear still allows them to get soaked most of the time. We’ve heard reports that some female SMs may be allowed to use an umbrella under certain circumstances, and we also can’t confirm how strictly a SM’s chain of command enforces this. But beware that SMs using umbrellas is as squared away as a football bat.
6. Wearing my uniform items could get me jacked up, or worse.
This is a sensitive topic for some SMs, but there have been countless situations where a spouse wears the SM’s uniform items in inappropriate ways and is perceived as casting the military profession in a negative light. Enforcement of this policy also depends on the SM’s chain of command or installation policy, but PLEASE be thoughtful and considerate if you ever decide to put on your SM’s uniform items while outside of the home environment.
7. I still need to salute and greet while we’re together.
This aspect of the military profession occasionally irritates spouses, but when a SM is uniformed and on the installation he is still required to greet and salute IAW regulations, even if the two of you are enjoying a nice private walk together. This issue occasionally catches “new” military spouses off guard – meaning those who are new to the military culture, perhaps due to recent marriage or their SM recently joining the military.
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Which of these would you change, and why? What else would you add to this list?
Which ones would you change, and why? What else would you add to this list?
//
1. PDA is typically prohibited, except for certain special situations.
Military regulations take public displays of affection (PDA) more seriously than many spouses realize, due to high standards for professionalism. Special situations like a return from a deployment MIGHT be acceptable circumstances for a quick “welcome home” kiss, depending on your chain of command.
2. My right hand is empty for a reason!
While in uniform, Service Members are typically expected to keep their right hand empty while in conditions that would require a salute, which is done with the right hand only. This may seem obvious to SMs, but many spouses do not know this!
3. I can’t talk on my cell phone while walking.
Talking on your cell phone while walking in uniform on base is one of the easiest ways to get jacked up as of late. It’s like putting a target on your chest. We’ve heard countless stories of Service Members witnessing a Senior NCO sprinting across the street to make this correction! Epic.
4. Why I say “no” when you offer me a piece of gum.
Many military units prohibit chewing gum while in uniform, especially while stateside. We’ve heard reports that this may vary depending on the military branch or command policy of the SM, including the degree to which it’s enforced. But just in case, it’s important to know this!
5. I can’t use an umbrella when it’s raining. Seriously.
Uniformed SMs typically cannot utilize an umbrella when it’s raining outside. They have wet weather gear for that, even though that gear still allows them to get soaked most of the time. We’ve heard reports that some female SMs may be allowed to use an umbrella under certain circumstances, and we also can’t confirm how strictly a SM’s chain of command enforces this. But beware that SMs using umbrellas is as squared away as a football bat.
6. Wearing my uniform items could get me jacked up, or worse.
This is a sensitive topic for some SMs, but there have been countless situations where a spouse wears the SM’s uniform items in inappropriate ways and is perceived as casting the military profession in a negative light. Enforcement of this policy also depends on the SM’s chain of command or installation policy, but PLEASE be thoughtful and considerate if you ever decide to put on your SM’s uniform items while outside of the home environment.
7. I still need to salute and greet while we’re together.
This aspect of the military profession occasionally irritates spouses, but when a SM is uniformed and on the installation he is still required to greet and salute IAW regulations, even if the two of you are enjoying a nice private walk together. This issue occasionally catches “new” military spouses off guard – meaning those who are new to the military culture, perhaps due to recent marriage or their SM recently joining the military.
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Which of these would you change, and why? What else would you add to this list?
Rules
Spouses
Regulation
Posted 11 y ago
Responses: 187
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If soldiers want to use their umbrellas, they can do so in ASUs (per 670-1). As for me, it's just water.
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PO1 Barbara Matthews
At one time in history an umbrella was considered to be feminine. Traditionally women carried umbrellas and parasols. This goes back a few generations. I guess because the military is make dominated they didn't want to appear effeminate.
Times and customs have changed and the military is slow to catch up. Men ave been carrying umbrellas for awhile now, but traditionally it is a woman's thing. Thinking about it I never remember by dad or grandpa using one.
Times and customs have changed and the military is slow to catch up. Men ave been carrying umbrellas for awhile now, but traditionally it is a woman's thing. Thinking about it I never remember by dad or grandpa using one.
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COL Mark Crowley
I grew up in the great State of Idaho and it is a tradition that real men do NOT carry umbrellas or they would forfeit their "man cards" and even at the ripe old age of 68 I still uphold that sentiment.
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CPT (Join to see)
PO1 Barbara Matthews - I'm sure your great-grandpa did though, if he was any sort of respectable Victorian gentleman. http://www.artofmanliness.com/2009/01/05/bartitsu-gentlemen/
Bartitsu: The Martial Art of Gentlemen | The Art of Manliness
Bartitsu was created by William Barton-Wright, an English railroad engineer. This is the history of that martial art.
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CSM Charles Hayden Passed 7/29/2025
COL Mark Crowley - Agreed Colonel, the umbrella atteched to the trunk lid of my last MBZ 550,was never used! The newer model does not have an umbrella. Just. audio speakers in the trunk and where the sunglass holder was before.
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Since this thread has also gotten on the "regs that no one follows" topic, how about consumption of alcohol is not allowed while on duty? Combine that with just about every formal Army event (including the injunction from commanders "this is your place of duty"). A good deal of what happens in the Army is not according to regulation, unwritten rules, and unwritten exceptions to regulations. It can be irritating at times, actually. I'd prefer if we just made some rules that made sense then stuck with 'em, but when that happens pigs will be flying and it'll be snowing in Hell, too.
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CPO (Join to see)
There is a rule for everything, an exception to every rule, and the rules constantly change. Not to mention that terminology and definitions are inconsistent from one reg to the next.
"A good deal of what happens in the Army is not according to regulation ... I'd prefer if we just made some rules that made sense then stuck with 'em" --- Amen to that! In addition to picking an choosing which regs to follow/ignore, how about the organizations that find it too difficult to officially revise a reg or form, so the command keeps everything in perpetual draft mode to avoid proper review and never need final signature (even though AR forbids it). Or various offices issue a memorandum that modifies the reg but those memos are never posted with the reg so everyone checking the official APD website reads the old AR that was superseded/modified by the memo that can't be found (or ALARACT, MILPER Msg, etc. that need to be found at other websites.)
"A good deal of what happens in the Army is not according to regulation ... I'd prefer if we just made some rules that made sense then stuck with 'em" --- Amen to that! In addition to picking an choosing which regs to follow/ignore, how about the organizations that find it too difficult to officially revise a reg or form, so the command keeps everything in perpetual draft mode to avoid proper review and never need final signature (even though AR forbids it). Or various offices issue a memorandum that modifies the reg but those memos are never posted with the reg so everyone checking the official APD website reads the old AR that was superseded/modified by the memo that can't be found (or ALARACT, MILPER Msg, etc. that need to be found at other websites.)
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MSG John Wirts
You had to bring up snowing in Hell, didn't you. When I was going through recruiters school, ,the instructor told of one very conscientious recruiter ho kept a log of all his counseling sessions. One of the most often heard phrases was "I'll reenlist when Hell freezes over! Well it happened, Hell Mi froze over, the Banner headline on the newspaper was Hell freezes over! He bought every paper he could find and mailed them out to every one who said I'll reenlist when Hell freezes over. I guess he got some takers though the instructor never did say how it worked out!
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CPO Harry Stearns
Regulations are for the guidance of Commanding Officers and Commanding Officers can make exceptions to those regulations. Mind you, if a higher level of command finds that exception to be objectionable then the Commanding Officer has to answer for it. Regulations were never meant to tie a CO's hands.
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another i would add to the list would be:
My military duty comes before anything. Deviations or exceptions are only made on the principle of my chain of command.
My military duty comes before anything. Deviations or exceptions are only made on the principle of my chain of command.
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SSG (Join to see)
Yes! Absolutely. Like when you have a vacation or just a weekend trip planned out and get told you have duty or training or just something comes up and you have to cancel. I'm sorry I couldn't come home for the beautiful dinner you made, I have to stay until 2000 to get all my counselings and online training done before tomorrow.
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GySgt (Join to see)
"I'm sorry was it her dad or yours? O' it was her's, well you can't go to the funeral - we can afford to let you go at the moment."
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Renee Steel
Agreed. I have no problem with any of that. However, when a clerical error was made to schedule my husband for work on our wedding day, I was upset and rightfully so.
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LTJG Edward Bangor Jr
May be carried when weather conditions warrant, provided safety regulations or practices are not violated (for example, FOD hazard). The umbrella should be carried in the left hand to permit saluting. The umbrella shall not be carried during military formations.
From http://www.public.navy.mil/bupers-npc/support/uniforms/uniformregulations/uniformcomponents/Pages/3501_99.aspx
So Navy actually allows them too.
From http://www.public.navy.mil/bupers-npc/support/uniforms/uniformregulations/uniformcomponents/Pages/3501_99.aspx
So Navy actually allows them too.
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"3. I can’t talk on my cell phone while walking."
The title there explains everything. I've seen too many people (military status has no bearing on this) who will walk in front of cars, into light posts or people, etc while blindly chatting away on their phone or worse texting.
This rule should be for everybody.
The title there explains everything. I've seen too many people (military status has no bearing on this) who will walk in front of cars, into light posts or people, etc while blindly chatting away on their phone or worse texting.
This rule should be for everybody.
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SP5 Michael Rathbun
SMSgt Lawrence McCarter - actually makes me sorta in favor of the self-piloting automobile.
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PO2 Joshua Shellenberger
SP5 Michael Rathbun - North Dallas Tollway? Why am I not surprised. North Texas has the worst drivers I have ever seen in my life.
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SP5 Michael Rathbun
PO2 Joshua Shellenberger when we moved here, I was convinced that it must have been all the Detroiters who had moved here when GM bought EDS. However, subsequent experiences have convinced me that no, it's just that a small but significant percentage of D/FW drivers are simply self-absorbed assholes.
On the other hand, driving on the roads north of 380, you meet people who have a more relaxed and cooperative attitude. You find yourself wondering why everybody is driving at or below the speed limit.
On the other hand, driving on the roads north of 380, you meet people who have a more relaxed and cooperative attitude. You find yourself wondering why everybody is driving at or below the speed limit.
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PO2 Joshua Shellenberger
SP5 Michael Rathbun - I moved to Denton from Virginia. I drove a UPS truck for 3 years in the mean streets of DC. I thought I had seen it all.....until I met I-35, the NDT, The George Bush, and University Drive. Apparently drivers ed in North Texas doesn't teach signaling, checking your mirrors, proper merge techniques, what stop signs are for, and just basic road etiquette.
I live in Tucson now and the drivers are better they just drive so slooooooooooooooow. All the retirees and snow birds from up north I guess.
I live in Tucson now and the drivers are better they just drive so slooooooooooooooow. All the retirees and snow birds from up north I guess.
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This is funny. I've been out 5 years now and my wife still doesn't know why I don't use an umbrella... We weren't married when I was in. I always told her I didn't need one (because that's what I was told). I never thought that it was actually regs. Hahaha! Guess they really brainwashed this jarhead with that one!
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Sgt Mike Jacobi
Yep. And to this day almost five decades since discharge, I rarely if ever put my hands in mu pockets or carry things in my right hand, (if I can avoid it) This USAF wingnut learned the hard way and never has forgotten the lesson.
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Do not be offended when someond calls you Sir or Ma'am. It is sign of respect.
I earned my rank. I wear the rank. It is my rank not yours. You cannot give my Soldiers orders.
I earned my rank. I wear the rank. It is my rank not yours. You cannot give my Soldiers orders.
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SPC Jesse Barber
While on active duty, I worked in a clinic in a hospital. One day a generals wife came in for an appointment, and was demanding to be seen right away because her husband was a general. There were several enlisted waiting to be seen when her husband walked inand saw the rant. He told her "Sit down and shut up. You do not wear the rank , I do, and these soldiers will be seen before you!" Still laugh about this one.
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Sgt Mike Jacobi
Sadly, in some cases dependents of higher ranking officers get preferred treatment. Its bad for morale and, in the instance I witnessed it, the Wing Commanders wife corrected the problem on the spot.
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AN Eric Lewis
My mother-in-law asked me to stop calling her Ma'am. She said it should only be used for the military, that she preferred to be called by her name. Old habits do die hard. So, I try now to only use it when talking to older people I don't know or people in obvious positions of authority. Younger people I don't know I still refer to as Ms. or Mr. unless invited to call them by their first names. I must say I am not comfortable with people I don't know calling me by my first name, though. I find it rude and disrespectful. But, I was raised in a military family and went straight into the military after high school, then attended a strict, formal business school for my undergraduate work after the military. So, all of my younger years were spent saying Sir, Ma'am, Mr., Mrs., and Ms., unless invited to use a different title or name.
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SPC Steve ChenRobbins
Where I grew up we didn't much use "sir" or ma'am" and it took me a little while to get used to using it smoothly. One thing that helped was when I realized that you can assign the meaning to a word internally that you thing best fits. Military courtesy was upheld and I still get a smile on my face when I think back to some of the times I used this concept.
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I wouldn't change them, I do like knowing the rules so that I don't accidentally get my husband in trouble
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I wouldn't change one. Suck it up dependasaurus. You chose these rules when you chose that BAH.
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