An actual police report from Camp Pendleton

I would almost have to say that this PO1 really shouldn't face too much NJP since the raccoon messed his world up enough. Let's face it, he is never going to live that one down. On top of the fact that he was creative enough to try and use an animal to bypass the machine, so I will give him points for that. Otherwise, just slap that "Dumbass" stamp on his forehead.

Not true:

https://www.google.com/search?q=navy+man+uses+racoon+&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8#q=navy+man+uses+raccoon

I've only seen this on Facebook up until now, so I doubt it actually happened.

Nothing is idiot proof; idiots are too ingenious.

I believe it! I loved working their as an MP because there was never a dull moment while working on patrol there. You also get to work with the Border Patrol, CHP and Ocean Side Police department.

Sounds like a scene from "tommy boy"... LMAO

No word on the condition of the raccoon...
Turns out next week's solution presented itself when the Petty Officer purloined one of the floating mats from the pool. Interlock starter in a bag... that should last him months.

I can't quit laughing

Kinda reminds me of the two guys in an old pickup that went off the road. The cop figured they were drunk, but no. Seems the headlights went out due to a blown fuse. They didn't have a spare but did have a 22 long rifle. The truck went a ways before the bullet blew into the driver's nuts, hence the accident.

Too funny to be true, but definitely a hilarious twist to beating the breathalyzer.