Did you get an Article 15? What was yours for?

Myself and a fellow Corporal were called to the company office. Captain "dumbass" started telling both of of us we were being NJP'd for having an affair, to which both of us starting laughing. He proceeded to tell us that our leave was being cancelled and neither of us were going anywhere together and the morning visits to my room were going to stop immediately. He asked "How would you feel if I called his wife and told her what was going on?" I said "Sir, I would be happy to call her and tell her - because she knows. I am donating eggs to them so they can have a baby. His wife's eggs aren't viable because she had chemotherapy at 13. We went on leave to go to the fertility clinic. He has been coming into my room to give me hormone shots and we are going back on leave to have to eggs harvested and he kinda need to be there to jerk off in the cup so his wife can get pregnant." The Captain was at a loss of words and could only get out the statement "very well- get out of my office." It was awesome lol... Side note- they have three kids now.

Mine was one where I should have got one (I deserved it). I was in the Guard and we were short a PSG and getting ready to deploy. The Guard had a full time SFC that was a dirtbag and they were trying to force him to retire. They told him he could retire or deploy with us. He showed them. He deployed with us.

When we got to Kuwait, waiting to head into Iraq, we had Platoon SGTs time. He proceeded to tell us that he was old Army and if we had an issue we would take off our blouses and handle it like men out back. He was a goof ball and we had to march everywhere together all the time. He had done some other stupid shit like waking everybody up in the middle of the night to practice mortar drills, but he was the PTL Daddy. One day along comes one of the worst sandstorms I had ever seen. I mean it was out of the movies bad. You could not see 2 feet in front of you. He wants to march to chow. I was like, "SGT this is not a good idea. We are going to lose people." It was almost a click to the chow hall. We made it about 100 meters before we lost our first person, by 300 meters we had lost about half the platoon. I had lost 2 of my soldiers and could not find them for about 6 hours. I was about to go into combat with this asshole and I was pissed. While I was out in this sandstorm looking for my troops the madder I got. When I finally got back I found that turd sitting on his rack. He was not even looking for his people and I was coming out of my blouse as I was coming at him. I was screaming like a crazy person, "You and me out back, I am going to kick your ass!" He wouldn't get up off his cot. He was scared and I could tell. I finally left and went looking for the 1SG. I found him and told him what happened and he was pissed. He sent me to my rack. I knew I was going to get a field grade over this one. I didn't sleep all night between being pissed and worrying about what the stockade was like.The next day a runner came and told me that Top wanted to see me in front of the TOC. When I got there he had a counseling statement waiting for me. He read it to me told me that I should never do that again and then he waded it up in his hand and walked off. The SFC got transferred to HHC and we got a new platoon daddy the next day. I never saw that counseling statement again.

Mine was in the late 70s on a submarine. I was working on an electrostatic precipitator (removes dust from the air using high voltages). I'd been troubleshooting it for a few hours. In the Navy, we put red Danger tags on the breakers of equipment we are working on so they are not turned on. Anyway, it has high voltage capacitors in it. I had discharged them and checked them all per procedure. Since I'd had my hands in there for numerous hours, it was obvious I'd done it right. I found the problem was a huge ass capacitor was cracked. This thing is the size of a large hot dog. Went and got a new one. Came back. Being the paranoid person I am, I went through the whole electrical safety procedure again. Reached in to put the new one in and BLAM!!!! I was blown back against the bulkhead by 15Kv. There was power in there. First I was very happy I was alive. I had my left hand clutched in my right and slowly opened it up and saw I had all my fingers still. I still wasn't feeling any pain. I got up, raced into the mess decks where the breaker box was and lo and behold a bleeeeep bleeeeep bleeeeeep cook had his hand on the RED TAGGED breaker with it turned on telling a roving watch he had no idea why it was turned off. The Chiefs quarters was right across from the mess decks on that boat and it took the entire off watch goat locker to get me off the cook.

Yep. I was put on report for assault.

And for some reason, even after the facts came out, the Chief of the Boat (Master Chief) who hated my guts, made sure it went all the way to Capt's Mast. (Article 15).

The Commanding Officer listened to everything. He asked me how I was medically after that. I still hurt. That hurts like hell for a long long time. Then he called the cook up there, who had NOT been put on report and said "Is this your signature on the muster sheet for safety training where you are told NOT to touch anything with a red tag on it?" The cook said yes. Then the Capt said that all charges against me were dropped and he chewed out the COB for pushing it up to him. Then he said to the cook "You are on report for attempted first degree murder. You will be court-martialed for this and spend a long time in prison."

Yes, he was sentenced to 15 years.

Sometimes they get it right.

Which one? From 1979 through 1982 I went up and down in rank so much they started calling me elevator. What were they for, my stupidity. 'Nuff said!

I love how so many of these stories are from senior NCOs. Like the lyrics to the song "How'm I ever gonna get to be old and wise if I ain't ever young and crazy?"

I had picked up a girl one night in a bar. We went back to her place and had, shall we say, a great time.

The next morning I woke up on time. Got in the shower and was about to get out when the shower curtain parted and she got in with me. Needless to say, I was late leaving.

I got to the company area as everyone was getting back from the PT run. Company policy was that anyone late for morning PT would get an Article 15 with a loss of two days' pay. Guaranteed. So I knew I was in for it.

About an hour into the day, my platoon sergeant comes up to me with a huge grin on his face (this guy hated my guts). "Whitfield. Report to the First Sergeant. Now." It was all he could do to not laugh as he said this.

I go to Top and he's behind his desk with the Article 15 all typed up just waiting for a signature. "Why were you late this morning?"

All sorts of excuses went through my mind. Flat tire. Dead car battery. But I knew that other guys had used those excuses and nobody - NOBODY - ever got out of an Article 15 for being late. So I said screw it, I'm telling the truth.

"I was getting laid, Top." This was the last thing he expected to hear because he kind of did a double take.

"You were what?" So I told him the whole story. How I picked up a chick the night before, went back to her place, how she got in the shower with me as I was about to get out.

Top picks up the Article 15 and says "Come with me" and leads me to the Captain's office. "Tell the CO what you just told me." So I did.

The Captain is trying not to laugh. "Is that his Article 15?" "Yes, sir." "Give it to me." He then tears it up, saying "Get out of here. I can't punish you for something I'd do, myself."

As far as I know, I'm still the only person ever to get out of an Article 15 for being late to morning formation and PT.

This should be an interesting thread....

*grabbing my popcorn now*

OK so my first was for being young and dumb, oh I guess they are all for that. I was the company commander’s driver, way back in 1979. So after catching me using his jeep to make runs down to the PX on a couple different occasions on the third time it was a company grade art-15. That was, needless to say the end of me driving for the commander. That damn Jeep about got me in trouble on at least one other occasion. We were on some training exercise, I drove the commander to a meeting he had and was to wait at a parking area down the hill from the meeting location. Well sat there for so long I got bored and decided to do a little off road driving with the jeep. I was going up and down these mounds of dirt, not sure what they were there for but the jeep ended up bottoming out and getting stuck on top of one. Took forever to get it off but I finally did and nothing became of that. Ok one more that I got lucky and didn’t get in trouble for. Was stationed out at FT Lewis, WA I was working in a S-1 shop with several young soldiers we would go out for Sergeants time training and get some drivers training done in some of the back woods areas. So after taking the youngers soldiers through the designated course several time myself and another Sergeant and a specialist went through the course. The course included a variety of terrain, hills, trees, mud and such. Well as I was hot rodding around the course we hit the muddy area, the specialist in the back seat stopped talking mid-sentence, the other sergeant and I looked in the back of the Humvee and both did a classic double take. The Specialist had been ejected from the Humvee when we slid sideways through the mud. After we stopped and made sure he was ok we all could not stop laughing. I was very lucky he was not hurt.

I didn't get one, but close. This is about the corrective training I received instead of an Article 15. I was stationed in Germany, given corrective training for excessive drinking (shocking, I know) and was sent to group counseling. The counselor was attractive, late 20's early 30's. The problem was that she would turn every possible situation into something about sexual dysfunction, I think she would get off on it. After about 8 months of listening to her doing this and still wondering why I was still having to go to those things, it was getting on my nerves. It was like she didn't take anything in group seriously. One day, there was about 8 or 9 others in the counseling session and one guy mentions he was dealing with some fucked up shit. I don't remember what it was, but on the problem spectrum, if sexual dysfunction is the extreme at one end, his issue was at the other end. I remember thinking, "finally, there is no way she can make the jump to sexual dysfunction on this one." I soon found out, I was wrong. She made the jump and I lost it. I went off on her and did a psychological profile on her in front of everyone. Said the guy's issue was as far from sexual as possible and shouldn't have even been though of as a sexual issue. Asked her if she has daddy issues or self esteem ones. Said how she is always wearing tight, form fitting outfits with low cut blouses that shows off ample cleavage. How she wears tight mini skirts and sits in a way to draw attention to her legs. Mentioned how she is always putting her pen in her mouth between writing notes and even flicks her tongue across it suggestively telling us all that she has an oral fixation. After a while, I shut up and sit back in my chair. Everyone is looking at me in shock. I apologize to everyone and said how this has been bothering me for months. A few minutes later, the session was over and we all left. The next week as I'm going to the room, the staff stop me and ask what am I doing there. I told them I was there for group. They in turn said that I am done with group that the counselor said I've come a long way and that there is noting more I can get out of the group. I looked at them and said, "That's it? If I knew that's all it took to stop wasting my time, I woulda psychologically profiled her in session 6 months ago."

In early '79, while the rest of the Bn. was gearing up for Jungle School in Panama, our Bravo Company was gearing up for a trip to what at the time was Camp Irwin, CA. This was at Fort Polk, LA Volunteers from the other companies filled the ranks of B Co. As I already had my Jungle Expert patch from going through Fort Sherman in '77, I volunteered for Irwin with B Co. The first formation I stood in with B Co, as we were doing a Dress Right Dress, a young Sp4 who I'd never laid eyes on, started yelling at me to move forward or some such crap. I responded by telling him not to get his panties in a knot to which he responded with "Fuck you Sergeant." I broke ranks, walked up in front of him so there would be no doubt that he would see the Sgt stripes and leadership tabs on my field jacket, and asked him what he had just said. He repeated himself and added something to the effect of me being a funny looking E-5. Meanwhile, we had been given At Ease, and I went up to the PSG, and explained what had just happened and the Sp4's name.
Later, after the Company returned from some ceremony, I was called into the 1SG's office and asked in front of the Sp4 what had happened. I explained the confrontation to Top. Top then proceeded to chew the Sp4's ass, and challenged him to say that to him so he could "put you through that wall". Top then told him to get the f..k out of his office. After the Sp4 left the office, Top told me that if the kid ever did it to me again, to grab him by the collar and shake the piss out of him. He even demonstrated on me how to grab him. He told me not to hit the kid as he couldn't protect me if I did.The whole time, I could see the young Sp4 standing out in front of the office waiting.
Sure enough, when I walked out of the HQs, the kid started in on me asking why I made him look bad in front of the 1SG or whatever. I told him to go away, and walked on to C Co's Barracks where I still resided with the Sp4 following. About the time we got to that building, the kid said it again. Once again, I got in front of him and asked him what he had said. When he repeated it, I did as Top had told me, but added a bit to it. I grabbed him by his field jacket collar, twisted it real good, and walked him back to the brick wall behind him where I lifted him off his feet and told him I would beat the crap out of him if he ever told me that again. I bounced him off that wall a few times to make sure he got the point.
About that time, the Bn XO walked around the corner so I let the kid go. He ran past the XO not even bothering to salute him. The Major walked up to me and after exchanging salutes, asked me what had just happened. I told him all that had happened except the part about Top telling me to grab the kid
. A short time later, I was called back in to the 1SG's office. When he asked me what had happened, I told him. When he asked how I'd grabbed the kid, after looking around to see if anyone was within hearing, I told him "Just like you showed me." The young Sp4 was given an AR-15 with a reduction to PFC, stockade time, and a hefty fine.
He must have thought he had grounds for an appeal and did so. I was called into the Bn Cdr's office where I once again related the story of the confrontations with the young soldier and once again leaving out the part about Top telling me to grab and shake the piss out of him. When I got to the part of him telling me for the fourth time "Fuck you", I said "I just filled my hands with his field jacket and started bouncing him off the wall behind him." When the Bn Cdr asked me why I had grabbed the kid, I told him that it was the fourth time he had uttered the words "Fuck you" to me and that I guessed I had "just snapped". Once again, I omitted that Top had told me to do so. He then told the new PFC that he should be glad that he had not heard about the matter sooner, and letting the sentence stand, he dismissed the PFC. He then told me that if he ever heard of me "filling your hands with another soldier's field jacket", he would have me standing in front of him facing charges. Now, I do not doubt that Top had informed the XO and probably the Bn Cdr about his telling me to grab the kid.
Several years later, while serving as a TAC NCO during an Army ROTC Advanced Camp at Fort Lewis, I happened to meet that same Bn Cdr who was then a Brigadier General and reminded him of that day in his office. He looked at my collar where my SFC rank was sewn on, and said that he figured his warning have been taken. I grinned and told him that I just never got caught giving "Wall to Wall Counseling" again.