Posted on Jul 12, 2023
Is it standard or even typical as a form of disciplinary action for an NCO to call a soldier's parents to complain about the service member?
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Hello Rallypoint Members!
I have a question regarding disciplinary actions that I have received from my detachment SFC. So I got myself into some trouble with an MP (argued with an MP after having a few beers), not gonna go into great detail (I own the mistakes that I made) but I am confused about one thing that my detachment sergeant has done regarding my disciplinary actions. The day after my altercation with the MP’s, my detachment SFC called me into her office, she informed me about what reprimands I could be facing (which I expected) but she also made me write down my mother and father’s phone numbers and she actually called them to tell them how much of a dirt bag I had been (which I did not expect). I am a grown man and can face the legal and moral repercussions of my own actions but was taken aback to find out that my NCO had called my family to inform them of the mistakes that I had made. Is this standard procedure in the military or even a typical form of disciplinary action for an NCO to make?
Any and all input is appreciated!
Thanks!
I have a question regarding disciplinary actions that I have received from my detachment SFC. So I got myself into some trouble with an MP (argued with an MP after having a few beers), not gonna go into great detail (I own the mistakes that I made) but I am confused about one thing that my detachment sergeant has done regarding my disciplinary actions. The day after my altercation with the MP’s, my detachment SFC called me into her office, she informed me about what reprimands I could be facing (which I expected) but she also made me write down my mother and father’s phone numbers and she actually called them to tell them how much of a dirt bag I had been (which I did not expect). I am a grown man and can face the legal and moral repercussions of my own actions but was taken aback to find out that my NCO had called my family to inform them of the mistakes that I had made. Is this standard procedure in the military or even a typical form of disciplinary action for an NCO to make?
Any and all input is appreciated!
Thanks!
UCMJ
Paralegal NCO
1SG
SFC
JAG
Posted >1 y ago
Responses: 217
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No, leave that decision to the chain of command; an NCO would be responsible for documenting everything, so non judicial punishment could be administered properly. In my experience, calling parents is never a good idea... depending on the situation, an NCO could direct the PV2 to call home (under supervision).
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No that’s not right at all. Shitty example of an NCO it should be between you and the NCO not mommy and daddy I personally would’ve been pissed and had a problem with them thinking that my parents influence my life like that I don’t know if it’s legal or not but I’d use this as an example of what never to do or act like when your an NCO
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I always handled my guys at our level unless they really screwed up. But WOULD never call mommy and daddy. It's the Army, not the boy scouts or girl scouts. All my time in service I've never seen any NCOs officers ever call a parent. Maybe no days with this soft army, they do it. But as an "old timer" I just can see that ever being done. Very unprofessional. I'm really mystified by her conduct. I guess it's the new modern scout detachment of the Army.
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No one, and I don't care if it's the CSM should be contacting anybodies parent for any type of UMCJ action, or company, battalion or Brigade level local punishment, unless the soldier is AWOL, and they are trying to track down the soldiers whereabouts. A soldier is at a minimum of 18 years of age, and considered an adult. Even if the soldier enlisted at 17 years old with a waiver, calling a parent is way out of bounds, regardless of the circumstance, unless it's a medical emergency, and the parent is on the contact list.
In all seriousness, what was the outcome of contacting the parent were they looking for. If they felt calling a parent was going to solve the issue, then they too need to remove themselves from their leadership position, because it's obvious they have failed as a leader to teach, coach, mentor, and motivate the soldier to operate within the core Army values.
In all seriousness, what was the outcome of contacting the parent were they looking for. If they felt calling a parent was going to solve the issue, then they too need to remove themselves from their leadership position, because it's obvious they have failed as a leader to teach, coach, mentor, and motivate the soldier to operate within the core Army values.
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The new military,????????????
I disagree, with all their new policy
I did 2 tours in the Marines, my opinion , it sounds like a power hungry woman , again my opinion, she's acting like a 2 year old, I'm telling, sad situation
I disagree, with all their new policy
I did 2 tours in the Marines, my opinion , it sounds like a power hungry woman , again my opinion, she's acting like a 2 year old, I'm telling, sad situation
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To have spoken with your parents proves beyond the pale; this, for 90+% of new recruits wherein such doing may be understandable and even warranted in some measure, yes, if the service member's responsible authority fancied that there proved merit in doing so; nevertheless, such proves most unusual, indeed, given that generally 100% of all new recruits' ages at the time of enlisting or commissioning are 18 years -- marking the legal definition of what in the USA constitutes adulthood, else all consequences that follow should rate this as at best a mockery; at worst, a needless chastisement.
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I have seen this work on a number of time in the army...because ...well the thought process would be that if you don't listen to your chain of command. You definitely listen to your mother and or father. Like the CSM said...a good majority of the young soldiers in the army have retired parents or brother- sister in the ranks. I new a 1SG who called a PFC older brother, be cause he was a 1LT.. Family has a unsuspecting big factor in the influence of soldiers.. you may not understand the system or yout punishment from the army side ..but your parents explaining army punishment from their POV ..is different.. My advice to you would be ...taken it with a grain of salt...no counseling is bad counseling....do you still face NJP. No doubt....but it may not be as bad as you think..and with the army helping you and your parents offering sustainable counseling on both side of the obstacle is not always bad
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As much as I challenged the patience of my NCOIC (he was an idiot) the one thing he did not threaten me with is a call to my parents! I know this was in the dark ages of the 1970’s, but still. Years later as a Squadron Commander my few disciplinary functions never even considered this. Not good, IMNSHO.
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I would oppose this under all circumstances. We are developing independent humans that need a value system instilled in them if one wasn't developed at home already. I have known many fine men who arrived in front of me as a result of "escaping" from their home. A bigger question for me is whether this was a legal order? My personal belief (which is worthless in a court of law, I know) is that this was not a legal order. While not the same as civilians, everyone has certain rights. Why couldn't I order someone reporting to me to give me the phone number of their kid sister (or brother)? Where is the legal line?
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At my NCO induction ceremony in Bagram (2012) the CSM who spoke said to do this. He specifically said that if your Soldier had a hard time making formation on time, to call his mom and ask why! I talked to Seniors after the fact and they were all on board. I was disgusted. That is not treating your Soldier like an adult.
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