How did you deal with separation for the first time?

A lot of great advice already. Before you go, set up a financial plan to pay bills and have "allowance" for each of you. For example, once you allocate your finances for bills and savings, you each have a set amount for whatever you want to spend it on. Staying on an agreed budget will SIGNFICANTLY reduce the amount of stress while you're gone. Second, if she isn't already involved in the Family Readiness Group (or service equivalent) please get her integrated; speaking with like minded spouses will also help. Third, write and SNAIL MAIL letters to each other. Email and texting is nice, but there is something intimate and loving about taking the time to hand write a letter or a card and sending it. Receiving actual mail is a morale booster like none other. Fourth, a pet can be the best friend to a single person; I adopted my dog before I met my husband (who is also a service member). When he's TDY, she's there to keep me company and someone who I can lavish my attention upon. And finally, communication is the key. You will miss each other terribly, but if you can routinely and openly communicate, mutual understanding and encouragement, your relationship will be stronger. My husband and I have been together for 6 years now, of which we have only been in the same place for 18 months. Its hard, but it can be done. Good luck,

For me I went back to marry my wife and it was still a year before we were even together in Italy. Then when she finally did come to live with me six months later I deployed. She will miss you. You will have stress. She will have stress. It will suck. But its not forever. Know that she is alone and misses you. I would say most of the problems we faces was really just missing the other. Always remind her you will be back and that you love her. Tell her to keep busy. School, work, volunteering, travel, etc. Encourage her to go out. In your mind think of it as a learning opportunity for her. Simple things around the house that she might not know how to do she will learn. Find the bright side to it all.

Kevin, I too was a newlywed when I had to leave for deployment again. The key to our success was a strong support group at home for my new wife. That includes good friends, close family and the knowledge she isn't alone. Make sure she's comfortable reaching out for help and knows who to reach out to. Also, be sure you leverage communications opportunities when they are available. Start now to establish a good friendship group at home with folks you know you can trust. There will be tough days in there and you shouldn't avoid talking about them up front and giving her the knowledge that you know she can handle it. Confidence in her and your support will go a long way.

I had been married 2 months before deploying to Iraq. Keep in contact, as mission allows. Let her know the menial crap you do daily, but keep in mind opsec. Let her go home to be with family and her support structure...

If the family support group is doing what it is suppose to do, then she will get some help. Before deployment, our FSG had some unit family events, BBQs and such to get family member together. Maybe try to get her focused on a job, hobby. Knowing she is doing well will make for a better deployment for you.

Needs something and/or somebody to occupy time; e.g., classes (education), hobby, sports participation and/ spectator, volunteer (schools, charity organizations), take local trips with another SM wife(s), visit relative, get a job (part or full time).

I didnt communicate a lot, rarely. My brother deployed the same time and talked all the time conversly. My advice is not to turn to alcohol when you get home. Both of us seperated. He has 2 kids with someone else and I never had relationship problems until returning so hope that helps

Keep yourself engaged in her life as much as you can while you are away! Also encourage her to find work, volunteer, join area Facebook groups to find friends, really anything that can keep her engaged in a positive manner while you are gone.

I started mentally separating about 5 years out...been studying Buddhism about 5 years before that...helped tremendously.