How would you react to an E2 who "smart mouths" you in formation?

The Science of Assertiveness theory -- aka folk knowledge (trial and error science)

Assertive (Leadership) behavior by humans: Builds relationships

Will the long-term affects be worse than any short-term discomfort I may feel if I am assertive in the first place?

An angry and loud communication can be assertive if one is expressing feelings (Using the word "I", ( I am really god damn anger at you ...)

vs. HOSTILE behavior-destroys a relationship: for example, ... “You dumb ass, didn't your mother teach you to report to work on time, etc. etc. Why, didn't you do such and such.... You should do such and such”

If someone has a habit of saying, "Why, don't you do such and such..." we all understand this to mean "I want you" to do such and such. There seems to be some kind of a taboo in our culture against people saying straight up, that they want.
On the use of the word YOU:

...the use of the word "you" is assertive when a person is acting in the role of boss, parent, or leader, for example, a law enforcer, a teacher, the chair of a meeting.

"You are expected to" (follow the rules, etc) , then every time the other person comes up with excuses, sob stories, etc, repeating this phase again and again ("You are expected to" (aka using the broken record shows the other person that you are not afraid to stand your ground and they need for them to rethink their poor behavior.

But remember being skeptically silent is assertive. Meaning, if I try to get the last word.. will I get punched in the nose or some other bad result.

Speaking up in a group to speak is assertive because one is taking the "psychological space" of the whole group.


Hostile behavior: A person uses sarcasm and intimidation to get what they want. One may get what they want, but destroys the relationship afterwards.
It is easy to give up the benefits of hostile behavior when I value myself enough to avoid getting agitated over minor issues and when I am imperfect and incorrect.

Non-assertive behavior: (shy behavior) doing nothing about unpleasant situations and simply try to ignore ones feelings and desires. While it may prevent conflicts with others, one probably will wind up feeling helpless, exploited, angry, and disappointed with one’s self. Being “too shy” to do something.



For example, “I am sorry to bother you.” This is an example, of how being NICE sucks us into a non-assertive down-hill fall. vs. “I want to talk to you.” “ I need your help or I need or want to talk to you.”

or "It was nice talking to you." (when it wasn't and you didn't enjoy talking to them).

Basic Assertive Rights:

1. The right to act in ways that promote my dignity and self-respect as long as others’ rights are not violated in the process.
2. The right to be treated with respect.
3. The right to say no and not feel guilty.
4. The right to experience and express feelings.
5. The right to take time to slow down and think.
6. The right to change my mind.
7. The right to ask for what I want.
8. The right to do less than I are humanly capable of doing.
9. The right to ask for information.
10. The right to make mistakes.
11. The right to feel good about myself.
Must I always assert my rights?
No, I am always free to choose not to assert myself, assuming that I am also willing to take the responsibility for whatever consequences may then occur.
Source: The Assertive Option by Patricia Jakubowski and Arthur J. Lange
and NO TRESPASSING by Barker and Barker.

I would begin by dismissing the rest of the crew and have the LPO and the offender stand fast. Then I would lock heals and have a serious conversation about how to behave at quarters, what I expect from an LPO and then I would provide detailed instruction to both, loudly and distintly (so there would be no mistaking my intentions) on the meaning of lawful orders. I would include information on the UCMJ, and provide detailed description of the brig and the conditions there.Then I would dismiss both individuals and expect that the work would be completed.

Press charges for insubordination and get them out of the military ASAP. In the old days you may have been able to get that piece of crap inline by beating his ass. No more though.

Well guess I'm old Army. After I put him on the ground and on restriction for all to see. Prevents insubordination. When we are alone I would then explain harsh response and question him. Sorry, my time women were not in the ranks.

Have him report to the 1st Sargents office for a company grade

Lol! Anyone who has served,knows how this will work out,in the real world,disobeying a direct order,can lead to a very bad consequence!

If you're in the navy you have a private conversation and a counseling session. If you are army infantry you out this kid in the front leaning rest, re-assign his task to his team and make this kid do all manner of strength and conditioning exercises until such a time he is ready to re-join his team and take over those duties. He then gets assigned all of the crap details for the days, weeks or months ahead until he has proven to have corrected the error of his ways. The proof would be when his team approached me and to call off the fire or when his team started jumping in to help with his details.

Full On DI comes out. I'll would Darth Vader choke him out. "Since we cant touch them" then after ripping him a new asshole. Get him some nice EMI authorized by the CO.

I'd all over their ass. If they still didn't respond, he/she and I would have a discussion with the platoon sergeant, and i push for at least administrative action if not an article 15.

Lock up his heels in front of the C.O. and let him explain to the CO why he doesn't want to do the task handed down to him and explain that this task came from the CO