Posted on Jan 23, 2014
SSG Cannon Crew Member
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People always have some pretty colorful excuses for not joining the military. What are your favorite/ most absurd?
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Responses: 347
SN (Non-Rated)
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"Made it half way through boot camp, it was way harder than I thought it was going to be so I left." And then my second favorite - "I'm too smart to join." - the 24 y/o making minimum wage with a bachlor's degree and thousands in student loans.
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SFC Recruiter
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I came out to recruiting shortly before president Bush left office. I heard the excuse, I dont support bush so I won't join while he's in office. Once president Obama took over, I heard that they didn't want to fight bush's war (same kid). I recruit in a different region now. I've heard someone say they don't support Obama and won't join while he's in office. They'll take any reason they can not to serve.
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SSgt Terry P.
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"I have heard how early the military gets up and i am just not a morning person"
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CPT Marc Serrá
CPT Marc Serrá
10 y
I can relate to that one. I've spent quite a bit of time in uniform (4 honorable discharges...so far) and that early morning thing is the number one reason I haven't gone back this time.
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SGT Avenger Crew Member
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"I'm not a bullet sponge" was one I found quite interesting. I told them I wasn't either, I was in the Navy and then an air defender in the Army National Guard. Some just aren't cut out for it I guess.
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SPC Brent Webster
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My favorite was actually from my father. I served in the Navy before joining the Army, and was attached to the 7th Fleet. We were Forward Deployed, I spent more time out to sea than in port (it seemed.)

Anyway, after being discharged my father made the bold statement "Son you were in the Navy, didn't really have to get your hands dirty. My father was in the Army and was a real man. Carrying a hundred pounds on your back, making your way through treacherous landscapes, that's a man, a real man."

Keep in mind this was the first time I've hung out with my father since I was 2 years old. I was discharged around the age of 23...

So I replied, "So if that's what 'real' men do, why didn't YOU join."

His face flushed red and the response he uttered was, " I would have but..."

Honestly I stopped listening to him after he mumbled those words. I spent my whole career overseas, and busted my tail doing my job. I didn't sit at a desk, I didn't work in communications, I worked one of the oldest rates in the history of the United States Navy. I was stationed away from everything and everyone I loved. To this day, I don't like celebrating holidays. I spent so many working, they just became another day to me. Like many other veterans, I didn't spend my 21st birthday doing what most did, celebrating it downtown and having an unforgettable night. Mine was spent deployed. On my birthday, I went to the mess decks, took a shot of water while facing the machine, and mumbled "happy birthday to me."

Needless to say, I joined the Army to appease my father and chose a respectable "real" man's MOS. After being discharged (Honorable) he had the same reaction, and showed his disapproval for me.

We no longer speak.
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PO3 Emergency Medical Technician (Emt)
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"I can't leave my bros back home."
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Sgt Packy Flickinger
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Canada is calling. But don't worry, I can still be president.
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COL Ted Mc
COL Ted Mc
11 y
Sgt Packy Flickinger Given what "we" now know about the genesis, conduct, and results of the Vietnam War, can you truthfully say that those people who left America for Canada BEFORE entering the military were not doing the right thing?

Please note - I make a BIG distinction between those who evaded the draft by leaving the country and those who deserted once sworn in (all you had to do was refuse to take the oath of enlistment to avoid that).

Please also note that I make a distinction between those who used family connections and money to obtain cushy, stateside berths with no realistic prospect of actually being exposed to harm and those who got sucked into (or volunteered for) the meat grinder.
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Sgt Packy Flickinger
Sgt Packy Flickinger
11 y
America called. Some ran like cowards twice or even 5 times as one politician. Most stepped up. Many stepped up on their own. I joined during a time of war willingly as many if not most here did.
I afford him no pardon. He's a liar, adulterer and a coward in my book.
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SPC Military Police
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They can't handle the change and if someone would yell at them they punch them in the face
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SPC Military Police
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11 y
They would punch them in the face.lol
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SGT Craig Northacker
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I joined the Army because the Navy recruiter was closed that day...then in basic I received a letter from the Navy offering to pay for my college through a masters program for their nuclear program. I went to my CO to respectfully show him the good news letter and ask for the opportunity to join that program. Being a good infantry officer, he snorted and responded the Army had just as tough a time getting infantry soldiers as the Navy did getting Nuclear officers. Needless to say...
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SFC Intelligence Analyst   Atl
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It is not a good excuse (an old CSM would say that none are), but the most common one I hear is, "I don't believe in war".

As if the only thing the military does is war.
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SFC Richard M.
SFC Richard M.
11 y
It may not be the only thing we do, but with very few exceptions, everything we do is to prepare for war
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PO1 Cameron Rhyne
PO1 Cameron Rhyne
10 y
If he doesn't believe in War, probably best that he doesn't join. Better they don't join then join thinking they're gonna do nothing but humanitarian ops or go to school.
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