Posted on Sep 22, 2014
SFC Public Affairs Specialist
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Growing as a leader, I've learned some of my most valuable lessons from making mistakes.

People are so afraid to get it wrong, they sometimes cover things up, or plan things to perfection, or worse... PRETEND to understand. What is this really teaching? I would like to hear what mistakes others have made and how they grew from it.

I remember as a private I was assigned the M249 during the field. My squad leader was right behind me as we were getting "attacked." I couldn't remember how to put the ammo in. I thought he was going to yell at me, I felt like a complete baboon, but he just waited quietly, until I figured it out on my own. I put the blanks in and returned fire. I learned so many things from that. He let me try all the wrong ways, until I got it right.

A little further in my career, we were doing convoy live fire training, and I just didn't get it. I was in a unit with bad leadership. They yelled at me and called me insulting names each time I got it wrong. So I pretended to understand and hoped no one would notice. A month later we went downrange. I still didn't understand the basic TTPs because the fear of being ridiculed was worse for me than not knowing. I could have killed people. I COULD HAVE KILLED PEOPLE. I still feel sick about this, 7 years later. I never want to be that leader I had. I never want Soldiers to be afraid to make a mistake during training. When my subordinate makes a mistake, it is a great time to explain how to do it better, and why... then the lesson will stick.
Posted in these groups: Ab5e0403 Lessons LearnedLeadership abstract 007 Leadership
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SGT Richard H.
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Simple answer: All of them. (I hope)
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MSG Wade Huffman
MSG Wade Huffman
11 y
My thoughts exactly! While I'm sure I didn't learn from ALL of them (at least not the FIRST time), I like to think that I have learned from the vast majority of them!
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MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca
MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca
11 y
I'm with ya on that one!
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SFC Mark Merino
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Edited 11 y ago
Never be afraid to ask for help. When leaders assume we have the knowledge it can be disasterous. There was a flight surgeon that died walking into a tail rotor because everyone asumed a flight officer knew everything about aviation. I was given the controls of an aircraft because the pilot didn't know I was a reclass E-5 and he always had NCO's who could at least keep the aircraft in level flight. What is worse? Not knowing and assuming, which can lead to disaster? Sound off. The life you save can be your own....or even theirs!
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SFC Public Affairs Specialist
SFC (Join to see)
11 y
@SFC Mark Merino. Thank you for sharing your story. It reenforces the fact it's OK to say you don't know! we can learn and go forward!
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MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca
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The list is long and distinguished (and all actual blunders performed by yours truly) but the key is I learned:

The star on the red plate for a general's vehicle points upwards. And 100 pushups later...

When the horn goes off at 0300, do not ask, "is this an alert" over an unencrypted network while on the Korean DMZ - and I'm a Signal Officer.

When your CO throws a smoke grenade into the Bde CDR's tent at annual training, run! - that is not the time to stand there and be honest while the boss is steaming.

Be sure the driver knows you are adjusting the antenna on the hmmwv before you do it and he decides to make a call. OUCH!!!

Get your promotion and advancement required schools done as early as possible so you don't have to attend one the week prior to deployment.

Do not let your non military spouse keep driving on and off post because they think its cool that the gate guards salute them. Getting a "don't let it happen again" speech from the Provost Marshal at any post is NOT a good experience.

ALWAYS, always, always do a 360 degree perimeter sweep prior to saying anything remotely derogatory about someone, but especially one senior in rank by at least 2 pay grades. I still have the ass scars from that little ditty.
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PO1 Disaster Survivor Assistance Specialist
PO1 (Join to see)
11 y
And did he mention ALWAYS by any chance? That last one hit me dead center MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca . BTDT - felt your a$$ scars all the way to Florida......OUCH!
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MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca
MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca
11 y
The teeth marks have faded PO1 (Join to see) but sometimes on those really cold winter days, I gotta get the inflatable donut out for some relief :-)
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What mistakes have you learned from?
MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca
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Never allude to PO1 (Join to see), officers and crayons in the same post, unless you want some really great E vs. O comebacks. Just did it again didn't I :-0
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1SG David Niles
1SG David Niles
11 y
I do, please share.
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MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca
MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca
11 y
1SG David Niles, PO1 (Join to see) and I have developed this friendly rapport and it usually involves commenting on one or two or all of my posts with his preference that Os sit in the corner and color with their crayons, preferably within the lines. F--king hilarious!
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PO1 Disaster Survivor Assistance Specialist
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SFC (Join to see) First of all, I think you have learned multiple lessons from the one single incident (convoy). (1) If you don't get it, ask questions until you do - even if it means you get yelled at. Lives can depend on whether you get it right or not. (2) You now have the absolute best answer why jacka$$ leadership that yells at you rather than the silent squad leader that allowed you to figure it out on your own is something YOU DO NOT WANT TO BE! (3) You need a thick skin in this business. Don't be put off by someone cursing you out, using profane or vulgar descriptive words. Use the anger you build up when someone curses you out as a motivator to do better, work harder, learn more and improve faster.

Kudos to you for recognizing your previous leaders correct approach (M-249) and wrong approach (convoy) - keep those lessons close, you will see those types again! When you see the wrong approach, use your knowlege and experience to show them the errors of their ways - you now have the rank to make that stick. If you see another like the squad leader (M-249), you now know which of these you can trust with someone that is having trouble and which you may have to put in your "trouble child" listing that requires a bit more training in how to work with people.

We all have our moments. Some take a bit longer to realize it.

I won't bore with my "lessons" - but I will tell you that leadership sometimes has it's price. Onboard ship I had a promise I made to my sailors - if you break something, tell me, don't hide it. If you hide it, and I discover you did it - I'll do everything I can to boot your sorry ass out of the Navy. If you break it and tell me and it's an honest mistake - there will be NO punishment. If you break it and tell me and you were being stupid (assuming proper training) - you'll pay a price, but not anything drastic or career ending.

One very early morning I was awakened by the duty watch - one of my smallboats was inoperative due to a fuel pump issue. I got up, stole a new pump from supply (I can admit that now) and grabbed the sailor responsible for that boat. I instructed him on the who, what, when, how and why - provided all the tools he needed and let him start the job while I went below to smooth things out with the supply pukes and the Cheng. Ten hours later I'm called up to the Captain's atsea cabin. It seems that the repairs had not gone so well, the new pump had exploded internally due to a single piece that was to have been removed prior to installation - a mistake I myself had made on other occasions. The CO wanted someones head on a platter and wanted a name. I refused to name the sailor, explaining why. The CO refused to accept my response and pressed hard - to the point of writing me up for dereliciton of duty. Now my career is on the line. What do you do? As the charge sequence continues up the COC, everyone in the chain, including the CMC is urging me to give up the name. I had some choice words for the CMC - leaving no doubt in his mind what I thought of him, his family heritage and his sense of honor. I probably would not be able to say the CMC was in my corner at that point. However, the Cheng, saw through what was going on and backed me. The XO was not happy but forwarded the charges. At CO's mast (article 15 for you non-Navy types) the Cheng instructed me to let him do the talking. End result; charges dropped but I could expect no medals and awards for the deployment. I changed into my coveralls, went down to the supply shack and got another fuel pump and handed it to the sailor - who apparently thought I'd dropped him under the bus. I told the sailor to install the pump, gently reminding him to remove the proper piece and call me when he was ready to do the optest. Two hours later at 2200, 20 hours after my day started with a shake on the shoulder by the watchstander, the boat was satisfactorily optested. I gave the sailor a thumbs up, went below to start paperwork for the next days work schedule.
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SFC Public Affairs Specialist
SFC (Join to see)
11 y
Exactly! In these moments I just hated life, but now I see the difference. I am glad you understand this post completely. I am motivated by your words!
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Cpl Dennis F.
Cpl Dennis F.
11 y
PO1 (Join to see) Good on ya, George!
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Cpl Ehr Specialist
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I have a great lesson learned not from failure but from success. As a Cpl. COG on duty during a weekend shift, one of my duties was to inspect off site secure warehouses containing mission gear. Because of the nature of the mission, deadly force was authorized in and around these locations. I was taking a junior enlisted with me on rounds, when I note that one of the doors to a secure building is unlocked and open. I go to check things out and try to radio down to the shack that we had an unsecured building. No response, radio is out of range. Next option is to call the shack, which would require entering the building. SO recalling SOP which I memorized upon joining unit, I instructed junior enlisted back-up to draw duty pistol, point down of course, finger off trigger, and act as my back up to clear the building. We get to the third floor and find an office with allot of people making allot of noise. Give furtive instruction to backup along the lines of "don't kill anyone" "don't point unless you intend to destroy" "Talk first fire second" stuff like that. We come to agreement and we make entry forcing everyone to the floor prostrate, spread eagle, palms up you know all that goofy stuff.

After collecting ID's and checking in with the Shack via land-line find out that these were all people who worked there during the week. No-one had checked the key out, so there was an illegal key floating around which I confiscated, and they did not sign in that they were would in on the weekend per regulation.

We let them go after taking all information.

Next Day their NCOIC was up in arms that his men where held at gun point and what was the world coming to. Essentially the sky was falling.

My NCOIC brings me up on office hours for dereliction of duty and excessive show of force. Of course I did not know this until I was standing before the man during office hours, at which point I recited my response was dictated by regulations, which could be located in SOP, Chptr X, Page Y, Section Z. The colonel looks at me, looks at the Cpt., Looks at the MGySgt. and asks "Is that right?"

A few minutes and a copy of the SOP validates my statement. I am dismissed to continue my day.

SO what did I learn from this what could be considered mistake if viewed from one angle, is that doing your job and knowing your job are two different things. I can do my job and without knowing it, would have been held accountable. Thereafter I have always "Known" my job.

As well, having successfully defended my honor I was now considered, the SME regarding SOP. At which point I was asked to review and re-write.

Always know your job before your do your job.
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Cpl Ehr Specialist
Cpl (Join to see)
11 y
As a Junior NCO, I found the Letter of the law was a better defense than my intent.
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SGT Mark Sullivan
SGT Mark Sullivan
11 y
I learned it's better to ask for forgiveness, than ask permission first, LOL
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Cpl Ehr Specialist
Cpl (Join to see)
11 y
Well I do not know if it is better, but it is certainly easier and with less paperwork.
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Cpl Dennis F.
Cpl Dennis F.
11 y
SGT Mark Sullivan I think the proper line is "beg forgiveness"
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Cpl Dennis F.
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With my private carbine training, I push my guys to 'shoot to failure'. Not shoot to fail, but until something, weapon, gear, or them does not work...and they need to understand how to overcome that failure, because something will ALWAYS fail. If you are having a good day of shooting, you are not learning anything!
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SFC Public Affairs Specialist
SFC (Join to see)
11 y
I love this! Thank you for sharing! I can imagine myself as an old crusty grandma telling my grandkids this.
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MAJ Robert (Bob) Petrarca
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If the posted question follows this pattern, "Should a (lower rank)_(action verb clause)_(higher rank)..." RUN!!!!!
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MSG Brad Sand
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SFC (Join to see)

I have learned more from my failures than I did from my successes. One of the most important things was that gravity is a law, not just a really good idea!
I think we should remember the basics, when we are asked a question and do not know the answer we are trained to say, “(______,I do not know the answer, but I will get the answer (______).” Then, get the answer. Not for them, but for you. The good thing is, and yes I do mean good, that you learned so much from poor leadership it makes you sick to do the same to others! How awesome a leader you growing in to?
Do not forget, sometimes are job is to kill people…hopefully not our own…but sometimes we could kill people
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SSG Jacob Wiley
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Lesson learned as a private: Don't marry her!
Lesson learned as a specialist: Dude, you didn't learn the first time??
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PO1 Disaster Survivor Assistance Specialist
PO1 (Join to see)
11 y
OUCH!
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Cpl Ehr Specialist
Cpl (Join to see)
11 y
Had to laugh at this...I am sorry... but I am laughing
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SSG Jacob Wiley
SSG Jacob Wiley
11 y
Looking back on it...I laugh as well. No sweat!
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