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Growing as a leader, I've learned some of my most valuable lessons from making mistakes.
People are so afraid to get it wrong, they sometimes cover things up, or plan things to perfection, or worse... PRETEND to understand. What is this really teaching? I would like to hear what mistakes others have made and how they grew from it.
I remember as a private I was assigned the M249 during the field. My squad leader was right behind me as we were getting "attacked." I couldn't remember how to put the ammo in. I thought he was going to yell at me, I felt like a complete baboon, but he just waited quietly, until I figured it out on my own. I put the blanks in and returned fire. I learned so many things from that. He let me try all the wrong ways, until I got it right.
A little further in my career, we were doing convoy live fire training, and I just didn't get it. I was in a unit with bad leadership. They yelled at me and called me insulting names each time I got it wrong. So I pretended to understand and hoped no one would notice. A month later we went downrange. I still didn't understand the basic TTPs because the fear of being ridiculed was worse for me than not knowing. I could have killed people. I COULD HAVE KILLED PEOPLE. I still feel sick about this, 7 years later. I never want to be that leader I had. I never want Soldiers to be afraid to make a mistake during training. When my subordinate makes a mistake, it is a great time to explain how to do it better, and why... then the lesson will stick.
People are so afraid to get it wrong, they sometimes cover things up, or plan things to perfection, or worse... PRETEND to understand. What is this really teaching? I would like to hear what mistakes others have made and how they grew from it.
I remember as a private I was assigned the M249 during the field. My squad leader was right behind me as we were getting "attacked." I couldn't remember how to put the ammo in. I thought he was going to yell at me, I felt like a complete baboon, but he just waited quietly, until I figured it out on my own. I put the blanks in and returned fire. I learned so many things from that. He let me try all the wrong ways, until I got it right.
A little further in my career, we were doing convoy live fire training, and I just didn't get it. I was in a unit with bad leadership. They yelled at me and called me insulting names each time I got it wrong. So I pretended to understand and hoped no one would notice. A month later we went downrange. I still didn't understand the basic TTPs because the fear of being ridiculed was worse for me than not knowing. I could have killed people. I COULD HAVE KILLED PEOPLE. I still feel sick about this, 7 years later. I never want to be that leader I had. I never want Soldiers to be afraid to make a mistake during training. When my subordinate makes a mistake, it is a great time to explain how to do it better, and why... then the lesson will stick.
Posted in these groups: 
Lessons Learned
Leadership
Lessons Learned Leadership
Posted 11 y ago
Responses: 16
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SFC (Join to see), my response comes from a slightly different angle. You know the old saying that bad news doesn't get better with time, so it's best to tell the truth, get it out there, and deal with the consequences as soon as possible.
I work in the security/counterintelligence field, and the biggest mistake I've seen others make is this: Trying to cover something up, hide it, make believe it never happened. That's very bad news when the information is (inevitably, it seems) discovered. It's always better to tell the truth from the start and to deal with the consequences ASAP.
In my personal experience, whenever I have done that - truth from the beginning - my leaders have been more understanding. As I said, I've seen people take the other route, and the consequences get worse and worse as time goes by. Plus, it makes that person look dishonest.
I work in the security/counterintelligence field, and the biggest mistake I've seen others make is this: Trying to cover something up, hide it, make believe it never happened. That's very bad news when the information is (inevitably, it seems) discovered. It's always better to tell the truth from the start and to deal with the consequences ASAP.
In my personal experience, whenever I have done that - truth from the beginning - my leaders have been more understanding. As I said, I've seen people take the other route, and the consequences get worse and worse as time goes by. Plus, it makes that person look dishonest.
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I was in Hanua Germany as an MP. Got a 'shots fired' call to one of the housing areas. The desk sergeant said this was probably BS but requested that I and my good buddy both go, we were specialist at the time. He gave me strict instructions, that I'm do whatever it takes to keep the situation calm and make her happy (but not that way, you perverts).
We get there and spoke with the 'witness'. She was a dependent and her husband was deployed downrange. We actually found shell casings from a starter pistol or other small caliber blank. I called the desk sergeant, after a few minutes I was instructed that no further action was to be taken. Once she was calm, we were to leave. She was so stressed but we managed to calm her down, my buddy who was a bit more tactful than I actually took a statement (wasn't needed, done for her benefit). Just when we thought we had her calm she started up again.
So, I thinking perhaps she would prefer an NCO, I called for the patrol supervisor. When he got there he proceeded to chew me out for wasting time, yelling and screaming about what a waste of time this was and on and on.
Well if anyone remembers the old VW vans the MP's used to drive, know there was a work station in the back for writing reports and taking statements and such... That's where she was, listening to all this...
I told the NCO, thank you for your assistance we will wrap this up and go as soon as the statement was done. He left without much more to say. She wrapped up her statement fairly quickly after that, thanked us for responding, and wished us a nice day.
We go back to the MP station, the desk sergeant 'talked' to us about it. He said we handled it well. That was that...
nooooo...
She apparently called my company commander directly. About two weeks or so later we are sitting in a briefing in the old movie theater on Fliegerhorst when my buddy and I were told to report to the captain, in the lobby.
As in "Specialist Fleming reporting as ordered, sir" (salute)... He says he heard good things about the two of us but wanted to know the full details of what had happened. My extremely nervous buddy says "it happened as you heard, sir"... there was a long awkward pause before the captain says "what did I hear?"
Well my buddy was now lost for words, couldn't speak... so I said, "If I may sir, what he meant was, that there wasn't much to the event and that it didn't require follow up actions" (or something along those lines). So the captain says ok, and asks about the NCO (patrol supervisor). My buddy still reeling from his earlier statement couldn't answer so, I explained the very basics of what happened (downplaying the sergeant's outburst). Then we get the professionalism and respect speech... {Why do officers always give that?} And he could talk (but I didn't see how it pertained to my buddy or I). Talk... talk... talk... silence. For a good 10 seconds or so there was not a sound. Finally my buddy and I both say "sir?"
To which he says "Come on Fleming I know you have more to say..." So, I proceed to explain how it was all a misunderstanding and she was upset by the events and that she misinterpreted his gruffness for disrespect, and that perhaps she made it out to be a bigger issue than it really was. (She hadn't, if we were deployed I would have smacked him in the mouth and still downplayed his inappropriate behavior).
Well, the captain was satisfied, proceeded to speak to us a bit socially, non-related to the topic. (In hindsight that bit was probably to calm my buddy more than anything...) Once he was done and dismissed us my lieutenant said "Fleming stop by my office, I'll be there shortly".
Being the good specialist I was, I went straight there. Inside was my platoon sergeant, he asked what I wanted and told him I didn't know, the Lt wanted me. We proceeded into idle chitchat about nothingness when all of sudden the door SLAMMED SHUT!
The platoon sergeant jumped to attention his eyes were the size of dinner plates (literally). It was all over the sergeant's face "what did you do?" He had a sign hanging behind his desk that said "I don't need any help getting in trouble" and his eyes darted towards it. Well I found this funny.
The Lt proceeded to rip into me about my behavior and that when you speak the 'man' it's yes sir, no sir and that's it. It found that amusing as I didn't know what I had actually done that was so wrong. His voice raised as he got madder, that made it funnier, the madder he got... the madder he got the funnier it seemed... I mean I could feel the heat in my face from holding back laughter. Then he called me a "dadgum numbskull" this was just too much and the look on my platoon sergeants face... I was about to burst! The Lt had gotten so mad that he began stuttering and couldn't speak except to say "get the hell out of my office" and "send in 'the patrol supervisor'" (name withheld).
I barely stepped through the door when I began to laugh. The long hallway was filled with people all looking to see who the LT was yelling at. The patrol supervisor was standing there and said "what did you do?" I replied "I don't know but your next..."
So of course I listened at the door. The Lt forced himself to calm down then said, "Specialist Fleming spoke with commander, the matter is dropped. Dismissed..."
Moral of the story... if your gonna cover for someone be prepared for the consequences.
We get there and spoke with the 'witness'. She was a dependent and her husband was deployed downrange. We actually found shell casings from a starter pistol or other small caliber blank. I called the desk sergeant, after a few minutes I was instructed that no further action was to be taken. Once she was calm, we were to leave. She was so stressed but we managed to calm her down, my buddy who was a bit more tactful than I actually took a statement (wasn't needed, done for her benefit). Just when we thought we had her calm she started up again.
So, I thinking perhaps she would prefer an NCO, I called for the patrol supervisor. When he got there he proceeded to chew me out for wasting time, yelling and screaming about what a waste of time this was and on and on.
Well if anyone remembers the old VW vans the MP's used to drive, know there was a work station in the back for writing reports and taking statements and such... That's where she was, listening to all this...
I told the NCO, thank you for your assistance we will wrap this up and go as soon as the statement was done. He left without much more to say. She wrapped up her statement fairly quickly after that, thanked us for responding, and wished us a nice day.
We go back to the MP station, the desk sergeant 'talked' to us about it. He said we handled it well. That was that...
nooooo...
She apparently called my company commander directly. About two weeks or so later we are sitting in a briefing in the old movie theater on Fliegerhorst when my buddy and I were told to report to the captain, in the lobby.
As in "Specialist Fleming reporting as ordered, sir" (salute)... He says he heard good things about the two of us but wanted to know the full details of what had happened. My extremely nervous buddy says "it happened as you heard, sir"... there was a long awkward pause before the captain says "what did I hear?"
Well my buddy was now lost for words, couldn't speak... so I said, "If I may sir, what he meant was, that there wasn't much to the event and that it didn't require follow up actions" (or something along those lines). So the captain says ok, and asks about the NCO (patrol supervisor). My buddy still reeling from his earlier statement couldn't answer so, I explained the very basics of what happened (downplaying the sergeant's outburst). Then we get the professionalism and respect speech... {Why do officers always give that?} And he could talk (but I didn't see how it pertained to my buddy or I). Talk... talk... talk... silence. For a good 10 seconds or so there was not a sound. Finally my buddy and I both say "sir?"
To which he says "Come on Fleming I know you have more to say..." So, I proceed to explain how it was all a misunderstanding and she was upset by the events and that she misinterpreted his gruffness for disrespect, and that perhaps she made it out to be a bigger issue than it really was. (She hadn't, if we were deployed I would have smacked him in the mouth and still downplayed his inappropriate behavior).
Well, the captain was satisfied, proceeded to speak to us a bit socially, non-related to the topic. (In hindsight that bit was probably to calm my buddy more than anything...) Once he was done and dismissed us my lieutenant said "Fleming stop by my office, I'll be there shortly".
Being the good specialist I was, I went straight there. Inside was my platoon sergeant, he asked what I wanted and told him I didn't know, the Lt wanted me. We proceeded into idle chitchat about nothingness when all of sudden the door SLAMMED SHUT!
The platoon sergeant jumped to attention his eyes were the size of dinner plates (literally). It was all over the sergeant's face "what did you do?" He had a sign hanging behind his desk that said "I don't need any help getting in trouble" and his eyes darted towards it. Well I found this funny.
The Lt proceeded to rip into me about my behavior and that when you speak the 'man' it's yes sir, no sir and that's it. It found that amusing as I didn't know what I had actually done that was so wrong. His voice raised as he got madder, that made it funnier, the madder he got... the madder he got the funnier it seemed... I mean I could feel the heat in my face from holding back laughter. Then he called me a "dadgum numbskull" this was just too much and the look on my platoon sergeants face... I was about to burst! The Lt had gotten so mad that he began stuttering and couldn't speak except to say "get the hell out of my office" and "send in 'the patrol supervisor'" (name withheld).
I barely stepped through the door when I began to laugh. The long hallway was filled with people all looking to see who the LT was yelling at. The patrol supervisor was standing there and said "what did you do?" I replied "I don't know but your next..."
So of course I listened at the door. The Lt forced himself to calm down then said, "Specialist Fleming spoke with commander, the matter is dropped. Dismissed..."
Moral of the story... if your gonna cover for someone be prepared for the consequences.
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I too have had my phase of pretending to understand. I have learned...repeatedly in the past...that it's way better to suffer the wrath NOW, and fix the issue NOW, before it gets out of hand. If you don't speak up now, the issue will get to a point that no one can do anything about it AND you get in trouble in addition with them being pissed you never said anything. Now I just say, "Hi I'm a dope. Here is what happened...." and then I hide around a corner while they yell haha
Ensuring BFT systems were ready for Annual Training (when I knew nothing about them but pretended I did so I can focus on other things) was among those experiences. Yep, they weren't ready, and it was too late :-)
Ensuring BFT systems were ready for Annual Training (when I knew nothing about them but pretended I did so I can focus on other things) was among those experiences. Yep, they weren't ready, and it was too late :-)
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"If you can't be smart or at least funny, quote someone who is..."
"It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so."
- Mark Twain
"It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so."
- Mark Twain
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Never, never, never, let an idiot clean the batteries below the turret deck of a M48 tank.
I had a gomer Pvt. loader in RVN that managed a short with an adjustable wrench that burned through the sides of three 90mm canister rounds causing a very brief turret fire and quite a mess. He was only allowed to run for cokes from that day on.
I had a gomer Pvt. loader in RVN that managed a short with an adjustable wrench that burned through the sides of three 90mm canister rounds causing a very brief turret fire and quite a mess. He was only allowed to run for cokes from that day on.
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I remember as a young private, and 11B. We were training for my very first ever live fire exercise. Squad level. They were going over everything and I made like I understood. Which I didn't. During the live fire when we "took contact" I took a knee in the open and started shooting. My team leader, a SPC at that time, looked at, got up, made me put my M4 on safe, grabbed me by the back of my LBV, and placed me behind cover and said, now shoot. From then on I learned, that If I didn't know, ask. That day I knew I could get my buddies killed if I didn't know what the hell I was doing. I took that and rocked with it. I try to be same with any Soldiers I train and teach now. There are other lessons I've learned in my 13 years, but this one immediately stuck out when I read this post.
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