With all the hardships and experiences of a deployment, what do you feel was the hardest part to cope with?

Cynthia Croft - Thank you Cynthia.

Sgt (Join to see), Lt Col John (Jack) Christensen, SMSgt Lawrence McCarter, Cynthia Croft, it wasn’t just the anti-war protesters, as bad as they were. It was also the shallowness of the nice people too.

In Viet Nam people had sufficient cause for a certain level of worry in their lives - would the V.C. kill their husbands and kidnap their sons; would the Americans catch them in the crossfire and destroy their villages, would they be able to feed their children, would they be able to get medical attention for their families, etc.

Back in the world, people had about the same level of worry, but since God didn't give them much to worry about, they had to make it up - "Mary said 'Good Morning' in a strange way, what did she mean by that? - Or "I have this squeak in my car that is driving me crazy" - etc.

I generally asked them to look out the window and tell me what they saw. Was the town on fire? Was there a bunch of soldiers with guns coming to surround their place? If not, count your blessings and quit your bitching.

For those who have fought, freedom has a taste the protected will never know.

Cynthia Croft, thank you - all soldiers share in that prayer.

SMSgt Lawrence McCarter - Your experience sounds like what I'd expect from New Englanders. I grew up in East Hartford Connecticut and expected reactions like you experienced, but that wasn't the case. Not sure which town was the exception, but hope it was mine. While there were many considerations this was part of the reason I never considered going back home when I retired.

I feel your pain brother. I have missed almost half of my son's life so far. It's one of the few regrets I have about the path I have chosen.

Sir, I've done both. Deployed myself (albeit during a quiet time in Bosnia) and was left behind three times when my husband combat deployed to Iraq. Hard to compare (impossible, really) as they were obviously different situations.

One of the only major disagreements my husband and I have had was similar to this discussion. After coming back from his third deployment, he said something like (I'm paraphrasing) "I don't understand why people say it's so hard to be the spouse left behind." I saw red. Boiling mad. The man had no idea what he's talking about.

He'd recently commented that he didn't want to go to the commissary if he had to take the kids with him. So I just reminded him of that comment, and filled him in on the million things I never brought up while he was gone. What good would it have been to share with him all the sibling squabbles or minor repairs or major problems I took care of when he couldn't have done anything about it? Nor did I want to distract him if he was going on a mission after our phone call or email.

Again, I wasn't on a combat deployment. I never got shot at. My deployment was my favorite year in the Army. I was damn good at what I did and was highly respected and recognized for it. Three *years* of solo parenting while my infantry husband *was* getting shot at? Terrified of a potential knock on the door? Not easy. Not easy at all.

I know they don't compare. It's not even apples and oranges - it's apples and pine cones. But when I was looking at going into law enforcement after I got out of the Army, my husband wanted me nowhere near it. How'd that shoe fit on the other foot, eh?

Anyway, enough venting. Sir, thank you for recognizing that those of us at home have it difficult as well.

SGT (Join to see) - My congratulations to you for getting through it. If it's any consolidation, realize that sometime in the future you and your husband will laugh when you reflect back on those times. My wife will never let me forget about having to go through a second floor window to get out lf the house after a snowstorm in the Michigan UP while I was flying B-52 missions out of Thailand.

Oh, we have already. But damn was I mad at the time!!